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Publisher's Summary

This is a self-help book for people who don't usually buy self-help books. Instead of offering cognitive-behavioral techniques for dealing with anger, or affirming strategies to boost self-esteem, this self-help book adapts the basic methods of psychodynamic psychotherapy to a guided course in self-exploration, highlighting the universal role of defense mechanisms in warding off emotional pain. Even the best self-help books tend to stay on the surface. Why Do I Do That? instead probes deeply into the unconscious. With easy-to-understand explanations, the first part teaches you about the unconscious mind and the role of psychological defenses in excluding difficult feelings from awareness. Individual chapters in the longer middle section explore the primary defense mechanisms one by one, with exercises to help you identify your own defenses at work. The final part offers guidance for how to "disarm" your defenses and cope more effectively with the unconscious feelings behind them. Psychological defense mechanisms are an inevitable and necessary part of the human experience; but when they become too pervasive or deeply entrenched, they may damage our personal relationships, restrict or distort our emotional lives and prevent us from behaving in ways that promote lasting self-esteem. Why Do I Do That? promotes self-help for listeners who want to improve their relationships, manage their emotional lives more effectively and develop authentic self-esteem that will last. If you find that even the best self-help books lack depth and fail to instigate lasting change, this psychodynamic self-help book may be for you.

©2012 Joseph Burgo (P)2016 Joseph Burgo

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  • Overall

Your mental habits matter

Great book that covers the mind games we use on ourselves and others to cope. However these habits can work against us and cause us to repeat the same maladaptive patterns over and over.

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

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Eye-opening information

I do not usually write reviews, but this book explores our defenses and why we do what we do and how it came to be. I was so excited when learning from this book; it could not wait to share the information with someone else.
I would highly recommend this book to anyone regardless of educational background or the understanding of psychology.
This is not you everyday self help book.
Eye-opening of myself, acquaintances, and those that I choose to surround me.

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

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Very useful information

A lot of terrific information, some of which many people may already know, but none the less even those of us who "know" it still need to be reminded from time to time. I would definitely recommend this book to anyone looking for insight into their own behavior and also think that everyone (regardless of their interest in growing) should read it.

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  • Jodi
  • Texas
  • 11-04-16

I'm SO GLAD they finally did an audible for this!

Would you listen to Why Do I Do That? again? Why?

Yes, and you SHOULD! Its thick. There is a lot to learn; as well as, you will find that your own defense mechanism will be on high alert. The first time I read this book, my defenses were so high I couldn't even categorize my primary struggle (need/dependence, difficult emotions or self-esteem/shame). It's such a good book!

1 of 2 people found this review helpful

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  • o. Hodgkinson
  • 05-10-17

Really open your mind to who you are

Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?

Yes. If you want to understand how and why you react negatively to some situations it helps you understand your behaviour. Well written, not at all patronising, real life examples make it accessible and helpful.

Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?

no. Although I wanted to you needed to take breaks and digest what you'd heard.

Any additional comments?

I listend to it twice, straightaway. Very interesting and helpful.

4 of 4 people found this review helpful

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  • Miss S Lopes
  • 11-07-17

Incredibly relevant and informative

I found this audibiook to be so helpful and informative!! It really helped me gain a greater (and more compassionate) understanding of myself and others, and the way the fear driven ego tries to defend itself. I highly recommend this this book to anyone wanting more insight into the ways you are holding yourself back.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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  • deirdre OSullivan
  • 04-25-17

excellent book! inspiring and comforting!

excellent book! inspiring and comforting... I want to read it again. thank you for writing x

5 of 7 people found this review helpful