Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay

A Step-by-Step Guide to Help You Decide Whether to Stay In or Get Out of Your Relationship

By: Mira Kirshenbaum

Narrated by: Adriane McNeely

Length: 8 hrs and 33 mins

Publisher's summary

To make up or break up? Whether you’re just getting serious or have a long-term commitment, no other question causes so much heartache and self-doubt. Many other books tell you how to fix your relationship. This groundbreaking best seller is the first one to help you choose whether you should try—or you need to go.

Psychotherapist Mira Kirshenbaum draws on years of research and her work with real-life couples to help you make the right decision. She shows you how to diagnose your unique situation with self-analysis and questions like these, which get to the very heart of your problems:

What sins are forgivable and which ones unpardonable?

Is your partner questioning your opinions to the point where you doubt yourself?

What is your sex life really like, and how important is it?

Is there real love left between you, and how does it stack up against all that you find unlovable?

Mira Kirshenbaum provides expert guidelines that are the key to making all your choices, concrete steps that you can implement right now, and the ultimate way to determine your personal bottom line—what you need to be happy. This remarkably insightful and probing guide offers advice that lets you see the truth about your relationship—and with wisdom and compassion, it helps you act with the confidence of knowing that, whether you decide to go or stay, you are doing the very best thing.

©1997 Mira Kirshenbaum (P)2010 Brilliance Audio, Inc.

Critic reviews

"[T]hreaded through the book, which is written in a sympathetic, chatty, accessible style, are validating anecdotes that dramatize how other people have experienced and responded to the same problems the reader is going through." ( Publishers Weekly)

Insightful

I enjoyed this book because it did not try and tell me what to do. It just gave me things to think about, and put some things in perspective. It is a good way to get out of the vicious cycle of thinking too much, because it sets a path for you to find your own answers. Just because you're ambivalent doesn't necessarily mean that things are bad OR good. It just means you need some clarity, and I think the author's questions are a good starting point for that clarity.

Really helped me resolve my relationship ambivalen

I have been ambivalent for years about my marriage. This book helped me understand that my marriage is too good to leave, and the reasons behind that logic. Now I can focus on making the marriage better for both of us in a more wholehearted approach.

Helpful guide to answers

Found this book to be a great guide to finding my own answers! Narrator was spot on in her delivery!

poor audio

The audio goes up and down too much with the performance, making it difficult to follow quite often. When it goes up, it is pitch you, and when down, it is lower bass sounds that can be hard to hear.

Finally someone who tells you what to do!

Read this if you want clarity about life, about love. Honestly what an amazing work. I read this book as part of a homework assignment. Im glad I did. So, well written, organised and above all the value of the content in this book is in the fact that finally a therapist tells you with facts and certainty what to do. Only someone with solid experience and outstanding skills can summarise a topic and give clear advice the way Mira Kirshenbaum has done. Brilliant book. Thank you!

Will recommend to anyone in a relationship

This book is soooo helpful!

Very clear, wise, and caring for the most common relationships diagnosed problems and solution.

I found this book incredibly helpful

It is a very detailed account of diagnostic questions to clarify the value of staying or going. It was illuminated by many clinical examples. I appreciate this author’s perspective and highly recommend this book.

Amazingly helpful

Yes this book helped me a lot. I loved how it was structured and provided so much guidance and useful detail.

Well done. Useful. Definitely worthwhile.

If you are plagued by the go or stay question, this book cuts through your own tortures and quickly gets to the point. It is fair to both staying and leaving. I found it very helpful.

Helped me feel SOLID in my decision to stay.

I was struggling in my marriage of 10 years, with a hum drum kind of attitude toward the relationship and to my husband. I felt like we were having the same fights over and over and changes would be temporary if at all. It was a good solid trip to check off and also reflect on the GOOD things in my marriage. I no longer feel up in the air. I'm in.