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Publisher's Summary

Do you feel like you are talking and talking, and your partner is never listening?

Do you feel like you keep saying the same thing over and over again?

Does your partner make promises, only to break or betray your trust repeatedly?

Is your partner controlling or just plain mean?

Have you read every relationship book out there, practiced your communication skills, and still feel unheard or neglected?

Are you done with second chances?

Should you stay or should you go?

We live in a world of romance and rescue - where everyone believes love will conquer all, and the more we put up with, the more loving we are being. It doesn't work that way. Sometimes we choose mean people, and before long we are in so deep, we don't know whether we are coming or going. One day you want to fight harder, and the next day you are ready to pack it in, and the next day you want to fight harder.

Should I Stay or Should I Go? is a survival manual, a guidebook, and a shot of reality. Some people will never change, and kissing frogs is the stuff of fairy tales, not real life. The Beast never turns out to be a nice guy (or gal). This is a book that breaks down what mean people do to us, how they do it, and what we can do to survive.

©2015 Post Hill Press (P)2015 Post Hill Press

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What members say

Average Customer Ratings

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Wake up call !

This audio book really hit home for me. It was like it was a story about my life, literally. I now realize how and why I have been suffering for decades. I knew something was wrong but didn't realize the extent of it. Listening to this book on audio was more powerful than reading it because hearing Dr Durvasula beautifully explain herself really was empowering for me. Also, listening to this book in the privacy of my car while driving about was much safer than being caught by my narcissist with such a book in my possession. Thank you!

9 of 9 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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This should be your Primary Guide dealing with a Narcissistic Relationship

If I were to purchase one book to deal with this subject matter, this would be the book. It is clear, concise, and very accurate to all other information I have researched in this field.

For me this book is the Bible for trying to figure out how to recover from a soul destroying relationship with a narcissist. It has been incredibly helpful and I will refer to it again and again. I cannot recommend it enough.

9 of 9 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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Helped me immensely

I had already read at least 5 books on narcissistic personality disorder but none were as clear as this one. I love that it is based on research but still very interesting. I also love that she does not come off as judgmental in any way. It's very well-organized facts that make so much sense. The book is written with compassion as well. I can't say enough about it.

4 of 4 people found this review helpful

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Most Helpful Book On This Topic

I can't say enough about how helpful & both reassuring and informative this book was for me.

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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Only book that breaks down BOTH options!!

Great book, I loved that it gave both options, & so true what you'll face if you stay in "survival mode". I think it would literally kill me, it almost has. I pray one day soon I'll be grateful he's gone. It's fear of failure, but he eventually always tore me down anyway, no matter how hard I tried. I've come back a lot already, & I'm guessing within the next year I'll be grateful I'm out of the decade & a half of hell. To a better life!

6 of 7 people found this review helpful

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narcissist survival

Provides great insight on making it or breaking it with a narcissist. Detailed overview of traits and behavior needed to deal with around a controlling person.

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

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She is spot on. I both laughed/cried listening2her

I married my long time (from long distance relationship) fiancee a couple of years ago. I am so frustrated and angry because I tried everything and gave in-numerous chances to her, forgave her multiple times because I was in love. There were so many questions in my head, that I could not figure out answers for many years. Why is she like this.
After watching one of Dr. Ramani's video on youtube (thanks to the recommendation section) I found sense in her talk. Quickly purchased her book and listened to it non-stop.
Man, She is spot on. I both laughed and cried while listening to her because my past 10 years were passing through my eyes and head all this time. I got my answers and I feel relieved now.
I wish I would have found it earlier when it was released, as that was the exact time i got married.
But its OK now, as she told; let everything happen to you, beauty and terror, just keep going; no feeling is final. And the main justice is that you got your life back.
I hope she writes a followup book, especially if you decide to leave; how to keep in touch with your children and save them.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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RalphyNovotney's Best Pick!!!

It's more detailed, more informative than ANYTHING else I've read on the subject.

3 of 4 people found this review helpful

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    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

Good content, poor narration

Authors should not always read their own books for audiobook and if they do, should always use professional equipment.

The book is excellent in terms of the content but the poor audio and self-narration make it difficult to listen to. Still worth it but, yikes.

3 of 4 people found this review helpful

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Fantastic

Clear, direct, easy to apply, fantastic book. Worth a reread every so often to those it applies to

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  • Dr A Arfan
  • 04-01-17

Very useful audio book, thank you Dr Ramani

Very useful audio book, thank you Dr Ramani, especially for recording this yourself! One minor comment; as a male 'reader' coming out of a relationship I struggled a little as you refer to the male as the narcissistic partner throughout the book!

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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  • Natalie
  • 01-26-17

Definitely worth the read

This book is well set out, meaningful and in depth. I'd highly recommend to anyone in a relationship with a narcissist.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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  • ao
  • 06-21-16

An absolute insight into the mind of a narcissist

..and an arsenal of advice on how to survive them. This book is a must-read.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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    3 out of 5 stars
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  • Abdul Ghani
  • 10-01-18

The book sounds like a glorified Buzzfeed article

She sounded emotionally involved in the story and I could sense a lot of anger. Many of the expressions used sounded opinionated in a repulsive manner. The book honestly did not sound like it was written by a Psychologist.

I believe the author's role would have been better off if it focused on observation and analysis rather than presenting advice as religious doctrines and placing narcissists in a place of someone with a personality disorder rather than someone who is deemed a bad person

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  • Peta H.
  • 07-16-18

A very insightful book!

This book provides helpful insights of the relationships with narcissistic partners. Great work! Thanks for helping people who are confused and struggling.

  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Mr R Kenny
  • 06-25-18

Hard to hear.

If you want a reason to leave listen to this, if not don't. One person's narcissist is another's life partner.