This Is How Your Marriage Ends

A Hopeful Approach to Saving Relationships

By: Matthew Fray

Narrated by: Rob Shapiro

Length: 9 hrs and 15 mins

Publisher's summary

A thoughtful, down-to-earth, contemporary guide to help partners identify and address relationship-killing behavior patterns in their own lives.

Good people can be bad at relationships.

One night during his divorce, after one too many vodkas and a call with a phone-in-therapist who told him to “journal his feelings,” Matthew Fray started a blog. He needed to figure out how his ex-wife went from the eighteen-year-old college freshman who adored him to the angry woman who thought he was an asshole and left him. As he pieced together the story of his marriage and its end, Matthew began to realize a hard truth: even though he was a decent guy, he was a bad husband.

As he shared raw, uncomfortable, and darkly humorous first-person stories about the lessons he’d learned from his failed marriage, a peculiar thing happened. Matthew started to gain a following. In January 2016 a post he wrote—“She Divorced Me Because I left the Dishes by the Sink”—went viral and was read over four million times.

Filtered through the lens of his own surprising, life-changing experience and his years counseling couples, This Is How Your Marriage Ends exposes the root problem of so many relationships that go wrong. We simply haven’t been taught any of the necessary skills, Matthew explains. In fact, it is sometimes the assumption that we are acting on good intentions that causes us to alienate our partners and foment mistrust.

With the humorous, entertaining, and counterintuitive approach of The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck, and the practical insights of The 5 Love Languages, This is How Your Marriage Ends helps readers identify relationship-killing behavior patterns in their own lives, and offers solutions to break free from the cycles of dysfunction and destruction. It is must-read for every partner no matter what stage–beginning, middle, or even end—of your relationship.

©2022 Matthew Fray (P)2022 HarperCollins Publishers

good but..

the ending was really confusing. I couldn't tell if he was really sad or not about hurting his wife? I almost recommended it to my spouse, but he'd ignore everything else and focus on that.

One of the most informative and real marriage books ever

This book was life changing. I have never identified more with a book in my life. Every married or going to be married couple and those who have divorced would greatly benefit from reading this engaging, gritty and emotional book. Five stars

Really insightful

I am so in love with this book. I feel so seen and feel as if this offers a clearer explanation of my feelings to others. Highly recommend to anyone. The author truly lends you a wonderful opportunity to gain empathy skills.

Best book, ever

Best book ever. Even if your relationship isn’t salvageable, you’ll learn a lot about why it was or wasn’t. This was worth every cent and I recommend it to every single couple

my adolescent sons will be listening to this!

not sure if I can get my husband to listen to it and take it in, but I'm going to be making sure that my son's internalize this message. hopefully it will prevent them from having issues in their future relationships since they are all single right now. I am so tired of being the supplier of empathy and not getting consideration and empathy in return. I saw so much of my family's Dynamics in this book. I have told my sons repeatedly that they cannot count on finding a life partner that is as patient and tolerant as I am with their father so it is upon them to do what they can to make their relationships work with other flawed human beings.

Great book about communication

This book is a good reminder of how comfortable you can get in a marriage and how quickly you can come resentful because of that. I read this when I came to a rough path in my marriage and this book shed some light on some of the issues we were facing.

Hit it right on the head in the first 5mins

Extremely eye-opening. Literally changed my marriage immediately. After reading the first chapter, I asked my wife to read it as well. Very relatable

Great story and very realistic.

Excellent book with great advice. Funny and informative. Really enjoyed his journey. Tells real life and believable stories.

Most relatable marriage book yet!

From the opening of this book to the closing, I felt as if the author was writing from direct inspiration of my own marriage. It was funny in just the right spots and vulnerable throughout. Finally a book that explains why I feel the trust and safety has been stripped from my marriage even though my spouse has never engaged in an affair or as the author suggested, “gambled away our family’s resources.” It’s the first book I’ve shared with my husband in hopes there is a chance to salvage our relationship with the help of this book and counseling.

Awesome!!

Awesome Read! I highly recommend to all married people past that honeymoon phase! Thank you