The Cow in the Parking Lot

A Zen Approach to Overcoming Anger

By: Leonard Scheff, Susan Edmiston

Narrated by: Bill Mendieta

Length: 4 hrs and 48 mins

Publisher's summary

Imagine you're circling a crowded parking lot. Just as you spot a space, another driver races ahead and takes it. In a world of road rage, domestic violence, and professionally angry TV and radio commentators, your likely response is anger, even fury. Now imagine that instead of another driver, a cow has lumbered into that parking space and settled down. Your anger dissolves into bemusement. What has changed? Not just the occupant of the space but your perspective on the situation.

We're a society swimming in anger, always about to snap. Using simple, understandable Buddhist principles, Scheff and Edmiston explain how to replace anger with happiness. They introduce the four most common types of anger (Important and Reasonable, Reasonable but Unimportant, Irrational, and Impossible), then show how to identify our real unmet demands, dissolve our anger, and change what happens when our buttons are pushed. We learn to laugh at ourselves, a powerful early step, and realize that others don't make us angry. Only we can make ourselves angry.

©2010 Leonard Scheff and Susan Edmiston (P)2010 HighBridge Company

A Zen Review

Would you try another book from Leonard Scheff and Susan Edmiston and/or Bill Mendieta?

yes

Would you be willing to try another book from Leonard Scheff and Susan Edmiston ? Why or why not?

yes

Did Bill Mendieta do a good job differentiating all the characters? How?

no

If this book were a movie would you go see it?

no

Any additional comments?

Although the zen method for handling anger was presented the actual application seemed to be missing.It would be better to give actual ways to use this method.

Good principles but poor performance

This books material is well written, offering good insight. However the narration includes strange stereotyped voices when relating quotes from individuals who are of diverse backgrounds. It is the same voice as the rest of the book but with an affected accent.

I had issues with the reader

The reader was distracting from the very important message. Here’s why. His attempt at “ accents” for the people he was quoting was horrible and was racist at best. However, I looked past that and found the message important and helpful.

Mostly a compilation of others teachings.

Would you recommend this book to a friend? Why or why not?

No, unless they had zero knowledge and had no intent in further studying Zen Buddhism.

What was the most interesting aspect of this story? The least interesting?

The most interesting was the authors approach to breaking down the fallacies behind the way we justify our anger and choose to be angry at certain situations.

The least interesting was the authors attempts at humor that I found to be first, not funny, and second somewhat disruptive to the flow of the book.

How could the performance have been better?

The narrator used corny accents while reading quotes in the book. It sounded almost comical. I imagine this was a sort of cue to the reader that he was reading a quotation. But it just came across as needless.

If this book were a movie would you go see it?

No. But that doesn't take away from my opinion of the book. It's not that type of book.

Any additional comments?

If you know anything about Zen Buddhism and the practice of realizing the nature of your anger through self-contemplation and clearing out your wrong perceptions and mental formations - then this book is going to be a rehash of other material you've already encountered. The best information in this book is information taken and quoted from Zen masters and other authors.

Simple but effective

I listened to this book in 1.35x mode. The voice and speed were spot on. I am starting it again for the 2nd time.

Obnoxious narrator, great content

The way the narrator gives other people voices might just be a test to see if you’ve mastered the content in the book. Otherwise, great principles!

Extremely helpful

This is the best book on anger management that I have listened to. Highly recommended!

gives you a different perspective!

one technique if not all should be helpful if you have not heard of them before. and its taught with great examples too.

Well… I got angry.

The book is fine. I picked up some useful tips but good sweet lord could that narrator have been any more annoying? His regular voice was annoying and wow his other voices were even worse! Couldn’t he just read the script and not added his embellishments? Sheesh.

Good, not great

Makes a good case for—if you are willing to put in the work—awareness as a way to understand and conquer anger.