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Editorial Reviews

Steven Carter and Julia Sokol's seminal relationship book offers a thorough, penetrating examination of the complex behavior and psychology of commitment-phobic males who, as stated in the book, can go from "attentive and caring to distant and hurtful for apparent reason".

Kevin Young's accomplished, measured performance reflects the high esteem with which these groundbreaking interviews and case studies are held in the field of relationship therapy, and his genial, conversational tone keeps the listener interested throughout this thought-provoking work.

Publisher's Summary

The million-copy New York Times best seller and classic relationship book.

Featured on Oprah and Sally Jesse Raphael, this definitive look at the dynamics of male-female communication gets to the heart of the all-too-common phenomenon: women who are ready and willing to commit, and men who back off just as the relationship moves toward the next level.

This audiobook can help you:

  • Recognize early warning signs of the commitmentphobic man
  • Determine the extent of his fears - and his willingness to change
  • Analyze your own role in the situation
  • Avoid unnecessary stress and heartache

©1987, 1996 Steven Carter and Julia Sokol Coopersmith (P)2012 Audible, Inc.

What members say

Average Customer Ratings

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  • Overall
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Best audiobook I have ever listened to!!!!

Would you consider the audio edition of Men Who Can't Love to be better than the print version?

I have never written a review on any book before, however, I highly recommend this book for anyone that has a habit of getting involved with men that come on very strong in the beginning to win you over and then decide that they don't want a serious committment. If you have been left confused by this in the past, believe me, this book will help you to see the signs of a committment phobic man from the very first date and help you to set the ground rules for the relationship right from the start. No more confusion or broken hearts for me. Now they play by my rules. And I can finally say that I can spot a player a mile away and know now what a healthy relationship is.This is seriously the best audiobook I have ever listened to and I am now buying the second book....He's Scared She's Scared. I will write a review on that one when I finish it.

7 of 7 people found this review helpful

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This book restored my sanity!!!

If you could sum up Men Who Can't Love in three words, what would they be?

Set me free.

What did you like best about this story?

This book helped me to put together all of the pieces of the puzzle. The puzzle being, I just ended a relationship with a commitment phobic. A man that treated me so badly, but that I was sitting around crying for. I thought I was going crazy. How could I yearn to be with someone that treated me so badly. Someone so mean and cruel and heartless. But this book helped me to understand it all. The beginning, the middle, the end and the bitter end. It helped me to understand what to look for in the future so that I never become involved with a commitment phobic man again.

Which character – as performed by Kevin Young – was your favorite?

I related more to the stories in "The Bitter End".

What insight do you think you’ll apply from Men Who Can't Love?

I will be much more cautious of a man that comes on so strong in the beginning. I will never allow the relationship to proceed too quickly. I will never compromise my needs for the needs of any man again. I will never allow a man to treat me badly again. I will love myself enough to trust my instincts. Instincts that I know God gave me, but I didn't listen to with this man. If I had listened to my instincts, I could have saved myself a great deal of pain and heartache.

Any additional comments?

I can't begin to tell you how much this book helped me. Being in a relationship with a commitment phobic created so much confusion, and self doubt. I got to the point where I couldn't even focus on my own needs. It is a paralyzing relationship. But this book restored my sanity and it restored my belief in myself and my self worth. I don't think I would have ever have found closure without this book. Also, I found the narrator's voice to be so caring and soothing. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for writing this book.

4 of 4 people found this review helpful

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  • Deborah
  • WEST COVINA, CA, United States
  • 01-05-14

Sound Advice for Every Single Woman

Would you listen to Men Who Can't Love again? Why?

Yes, I am on my second listen.

What other book might you compare Men Who Can't Love to and why?

Attached. These books explain the personality traits of men who are incapable of loving truly and genuinely

What’s an idea from the book that you will remember?

Stay independent and don't trust too quickly or easily.

Any additional comments?

I wish I had heard this book sooner!

4 of 4 people found this review helpful

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Lifesaver!!

15 unique words it's a good book it's about my boyfriend I learned a lot I'm going to break up with him this will be a lifesaver he's making my life miserable

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

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  • Cecilia
  • Volcano, HI, United States
  • 01-21-14

The contents of this audio book is excellent

What made the experience of listening to Men Who Can't Love the most enjoyable?

True to life. To the point and helpful.

What did you learn from Men Who Can't Love that you would use in your daily life?

It served as preventive medicine for me and it was also healing.

Any additional comments?

Highly recommend it.

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

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Excellent book

It is so crystal clear now. I was so confused. I was reading everything I could to try to understand what was happening. Still hurts but now I can start healing

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

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Very helpful

Tells it like it is, point by familiar point. Clear, no nonsense. I appreciate the emphasis on saving one's self. I will be listening to this audio book many times. Thank you.

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

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WOW!!

This book is a must read for all women regardless of the stage you are in in your relationship!! Complete eye opener on what goes on in a mans mind through REAL men testimonials.. Women have got to be careful and we must take care of ourselves and not rely on a man to create and support our emotional well being!! The narrator was awesome in his ability to take you on a journey through the many scenarios and stories throughout the book.. I definetely recommend this book to ALL women!

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

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Perfectly described my situation

I purchased the book & became so intrigued by its context I couldn't put it down. That's when I looked into audio version & am I glad I did.
I'd love it even more if I could gift this to a few men in my life. I felt I was going crazy with different emotions, mixed signals, I even broke up with my boyfriend of 6 yrs. when my friend of 20+ yrs. strongly pursued me....
Not realizing he's commitment phobic. I wish I'd know sooner. Now our friendship has suffered tremendously, I regret getting involved with him. Honestly this. Book was a huge and complete eye opener. I'm going to follow my instincts and to & pay attentions to a man's behavior patterns, their attitude, and their engagement.
Definitely recommend this to women out their going through a relationship where you feel your giving more than you are receiving, allowing a man to disappear and reappear with no questions asked, any woman feeling like she's always walking on egg shells afraid to say anything when mistreated, a guy that never called you back when he said he would. A guy that said he'd change & beg for another opportunity. Even someone going through a breakup. It will definitely give you fulfillment after listening/reading this book that we the women did nothing wrong. Loved it. Now want to get into reading "he's afraid, she's afraid "...

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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Wish I would have read 4 years ago

This books offers several helpful tips for a woman struggling with a undiagnosed commitmentphobe. Funny is this book was recommended by my boyfriend at the time - now ex - and I now have a much more eyes wide open approach to relationships.

Highly recommend!

1 of 1 people found this review helpful