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Publisher's Summary

Is this the way love is supposed to feel?

  • Does the man you love assume the right to control how you live and behave?
  • Have you given up important activities or people to keep him happy?
  • Does he belittle your opinions, your feelings, or your accomplishments?
  • Does he withdraw love, money, approval, or sex to punish you?
  • Does he blame you for everything that goes wrong in the relationship?
  • Do you find yourself "walking on eggs" and apologizing all the time?

If the questions here reveal a familiar pattern, you may be in love with a misogynist - a man who loves you, yet causes you tremendous pain because he acts as if he hates you.

In this superb self-help guide, Dr. Susan Forward draws on case histories and the voices of men and women trapped in these negative relationships to help you understand your man's destructive pattern and the part you play in it.

©1986 Susan Forward and Joan Torres (P)2017 Tantor

Critic Reviews

"Very important and much needed.... This how-to book could be a lifesaver." (Abigail Van Buren, "Dear Abby”)

What members say

Average Customer Ratings

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Very uplifting

I listened to the sample and found myself in tears. I knew it was a book for me and after listening to it. It has already helped me understand my relationship more than ever. It makes you feel like you’re not alone and there’s a way to deal and understand that it’s not just you. I wholeheartedly recommend this book.

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

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FANTASTIC!!

This book makes sure to draw the line of healthy and unhealthy relationships. She makes sure to tell you that certain behaviors are expected and at what point they aren't normal. I loved the fact that she included exercises to help with your self esteem. I told my therapist about this book and he MADE me do the exercise and it was a HUGE eye opener. I have a much more open view of everything in my relationship and my self esteem had been boosted quite a bit. This book helped me change the way I view myself.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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Narration

Sounds like a robot reading. No feeling. Otherwise the effort was fine. Maybe I’d suggest to friends if it wasn’t for the audio.

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  • Mayra
  • AURORA, IL, United States
  • 08-20-18

100% me

This is my relationship in a nutshell. I was compelled by the title because my husband claims to love me, but he loves to hate me.

I'll read this again to do the quizzes and take note of the advice.

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  • B
  • 08-01-18

Helpful

After reading, I feel a lot better knowing why I feel the way I do, and I have the tools I need to prevent this from happening again.

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  • Zain A. Blade
  • 09-15-18

An absolute must read!

Very insightful and very helpful book. After listening to the audio book, I just had to buy a copy of the book for my sister who is married to a misogynist. Coming from a patriarchal society, there are so many misogenist around here that it is easy to assume that it's just the way men are. To keep a man, a woman must be prepared to give up her identity and be willing to endure all sorts of abuse at the hands of her husband, which only escalates over time. It's an epidemic and, sadly, it gets passed down to the next generation. I don't know what can be done to address this plague, but I'm glad that a book like this has been written to help people begin to address the problem at the individual level, it's especially helpful for women who live in developing countries and who do not have access to a psychologist's help. Thank you Dr. Susan for another masterpiece. I read your other book on toxic parents, and I think you are a very gifted psychologist, among the very best out there.