• It Didn't Start with You

  • How Inherited Family Trauma Shapes Who We Are and How to End the Cycle
  • By: Mark Wolynn
  • Narrated by: Mark Wolynn
  • Length: 8 hrs and 16 mins
  • 4.4 out of 5 stars (2,430 ratings)

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It Didn't Start with You  By  cover art

It Didn't Start with You

By: Mark Wolynn
Narrated by: Mark Wolynn
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Publisher's summary

A groundbreaking approach to transforming traumatic legacies passed down in families over generations, by an acclaimed expert in the field.

Depression. Anxiety. Chronic Pain. Phobias. Obsessive thoughts. The evidence is compelling: the roots of these difficulties may not reside in our immediate life experiences or in chemical imbalances in our brains - but in the lives of our parents, grandparents, and even great-grandparents. The latest scientific research, now making headlines, supports what many have long intuited: that traumatic experience can be passed down through generations.

It Didn't Start with You builds on the work of leading experts in post-traumatic stress, including Mount Sinai School of Medicine neuroscientist Rachel Yehuda and psychiatrist Bessel van der Kolk, author of The Body Keeps the Score. Even if the person who suffered the original trauma has died or the story has been forgotten or silenced, memory and feelings can live on. These emotional legacies are often hidden, encoded in everything from gene expression to everyday language, and they play a far greater role in our emotional and physical health than has ever before been understood.

As a pioneer in the field of inherited family trauma, Mark Wolynn has worked with individuals and groups on a therapeutic level for over 20 years. It Didn't Start with You offers a pragmatic and prescriptive guide to his method, the Core Language Approach. Diagnostic self-inventories provide a way to uncover the fears and anxieties conveyed through everyday words, behaviors, and physical symptoms. Techniques for developing a genogram or extended family tree create a map of experiences going back through the generations. And visualization, active imagination, and direct dialogue create pathways to reconnection, integration, and reclaiming life and health. It Didn't Start With You is a transformative approach to resolving longstanding difficulties that, in many cases, traditional therapy, drugs, or other interventions have not had the capacity to touch.

PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.

©2016 Mark Wolynn (P)2016 Penguin Audio

Critic reviews

"Mark Wolynn does a masterful job of illuminating the ways in which our ancestors' unresolved suffering, often unknown to us, disables us and binds us painfully to them. He gives us the tools and skills - an approach that combines understanding, imaginative dialogues, and compassionate reconnection - to free and heal ourselves." (James S. Gordon, MD, author of Unstuck: Your Guide to the Seven-Stage Journey out of Depression)
" It Didn't Start with You takes us a big step forward, advancing the fields of trauma therapy, mindfulness applications, and human understanding. It is a bold, creative, and compassionate work." (Sharon Salzberg, author of Lovingkindness and Real Happiness)
"This groundbreaking book offers a compelling understanding of inherited trauma and fresh, powerful tools for relieving its suffering. Mark Wolynn is a wise and trustworthy guide on the journey toward healing." (Tara Brach, PhD, author of Radical Acceptance and True Refuge)

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What listeners say about It Didn't Start with You

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I was a little skeptical at first however this is a very interesting book and really should be listened to.However I feel that not everyone will be messed up because their grandfather was...it's a bit generalized and a bit far fetched at times.I feel that a percentage of the population will repeat the patterns of their relatives but not everyone.Hes basically talking about intergenerational trauma.

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Must read

Excellent read! Very informative and helpful in understanding ourselves. This book not only points out our teams responses, but teaches how to release them.

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Best book I have ever listened to I would read it 15 times ....

This book is a major eye opener for parents, parenting , kids , trauma it’s break taking 🙌🏽😇 extremely helpful

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good concept long story

good concept but tooo many examples for the same point. not really a good way to use it on yourself. he uses examples and examples but didnt help me.

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A deep therapy session, if you allow it

The book presents an interesting way to look at our familiar constellation. At the middle of it I felt it got a bit slow, but specially the last chapters nailed some of my issues. I would totally recommend to whoever's interested in self knowledge subjects. And make sure to do the exercises, it makes a big difference in the experience.

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Good read

This book makes you think and consider things you may not have previously. Recommend to anyone struggling with mental health issues.

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Helpful

Very helpful. Will definitely have to come back to this book periodically. Easy to understand.

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Mindblowing!

Opened my mind to the real issue stopping me from living my life to the fullest.

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Great book, but a little too extended.

I definitely reccomend sharing this book with friends and family members. The exercises in the book are relative and helpful

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Healing for Everyone

This should be required reading for everyone, since every family tree carries layers of inherited trauma. I felt
elated after reading the book and doing the exercises. It is a liberating journey, through understanding and empathy. Thank you to a wonderful author.

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