Sample
  • Mating in Captivity

  • Reconciling the Erotic & the Domestic
  • By: Esther Perel
  • Narrated by: Esther Perel
  • Length: 8 hrs and 8 mins
  • 4.7 out of 5 stars (9,979 ratings)

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Mating in Captivity

By: Esther Perel
Narrated by: Esther Perel
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Publisher's summary

Esther Perel takes on tough questions, grappling with the obstacles and anxieties that arise when our quest for secure love conflicts with our pursuit of passion. She invites us to explore the paradoxical union of domesticity and sexual desire, and explains what it takes to bring lust home.

In her 20 years of clinical experience, Perel has treated hundreds of couples whose home lives are empty of passion. They describe relationships that are open and loving, yet sexually dull. What is going on?

In this explosively original book, Perel explains that our cultural penchant for equality, togetherness, and absolute candor is antithetical to erotic desire for both men and women. Sexual excitement doesn't always play by the rules of good citizenship. It is politically incorrect. It thrives on power plays, unfair advantages, and the space between self and other. More exciting, playful, even poetic sex is possible, but first we must kick egalitarian ideals and emotional housekeeping out of our bedrooms.

While Mating in Captivity shows why the domestic realm can feel like a cage, Perel's take on bedroom dynamics promises to liberate, enchant, and provoke. Flinging the doors open on erotic life and domesticity, she invites us to put the "X" back in sex.

©2006 Esther Perel (P)2006 HarperCollins Publishers
  • Unabridged Audiobook
  • Categories: Erotica

Critic reviews

"As revelatory as it is straightforward....Perel sanctions fantasy and play and offers the estranged modern couple a unique richness of experience." (Publishers Weekly)

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What listeners say about Mating in Captivity

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  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

Every adult should listen to this one!

There are so many ways to be happily married AND happy sexually, and in this book Esther Perel lays them open for examination. It's about as far from a one-size-fits-all approach as you can get. and it treats everyone's preferences with respect. I deeply appreciate this book.

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10 people found this helpful

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    4 out of 5 stars
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    3 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

All the insight is at the end

I got this book because her Ted talks are done if the best I've ever seen. I was not as impressed with the writing early on in the book, but the sophisticated and respectful insight she gets to in the last two chapters made it all highly worth it.

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2 people found this helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Fascinating

The dichotomy that is created when love and sex of commited relationships combine as opposed to passionate sex and desire when one is single, have been addressed here. Her great experience as a therapist was enlightening to me. Her perspective had me thinking in ways I had not before. Worth your time!

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

A balanced and comprehensive discussion of eroticism

The author is an excellent source for exploration of the needs of couples who desire a robust physical life and deep commitment without ignoring one of the two. She states explicitly that she is addressing couples who desire long term commitment and seek to live a relationship to the full in both years and level of mutual trust.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Great read for those in long term relationships

A wealth of knowledge for those who want to better their relationships. The case studies are honest and Esther's expert guidance will make you see your relationship in a whole new light.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Very interesting and very real way to look at today's love and relationships

If you want a new more truthful way of loving and enjoying yourself and your partners. Please read or listen.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Got so many insights out of this book

Esther with her depth of understanding, wit and lovely accent opened so many doors to understand myself and my wife. Highly recommended.

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    5 out of 5 stars

Absolutely incredible!

I feel that anyone who both loves their significant other and is possessed of a desire to rediscover that which attracted them in the first place will find this book revelatory.

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Excellent insight...

Esther gives us a real time and real world peek into the nature of relationships, how they are evolving, how we can discover what is best for us and our partner - or partners.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Great book, great insights

Its a different sort of book, probably because it is not american. It does not give you a step by step approach to solving your problems, or the how to relationship manual. It engages you in a open ended discussion about couples, fidelity and how we view sex and attraction inside couples.

I love that the author has opened up this discussion, something that I believe we need to talk about and think more. This is the second book of its kind I read, and plan to read more, as it is such an important and interesting subject.

The only fault I find in this book are the French words. It is meant to make it cooler and sexy, but really, the book is in english! I knew some of the words as I do have some basic french, but each time I heard one I though to myself "not cool!" as on an audiobook, you don't even get the spelling to be able to go and look for it!

The narration was good for a author narration, but of course a professional narration is always better.

All and all, a great and fun read!

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