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Publisher's Summary

If you think you need to change your marriage, think again. It may well be that your marriage is trying to change you. In Secrets of a Passionate Marriage, Dr. David Schnarch shares a revolutionary approach thousands have used to take their relationships to new and lasting heights of sexual ecstasy and intimacy. Emotionally committed relationships, he teaches, are people-growing machines, and sexual difficulty and other challenges are actually signs of a healthy, maturing relationship. Moving beyond traditional therapies that work a little bit, Dr. Schnarch brings straight talk and humor to his three decades of expertise and offers insights into:

  • Emotional gridlock - why this critical phase is necessary for the healthy evolution of all relationships
  • How to "self-soothe" your anxieties and open to the full range of human eroticism
  • The psychology of sex - how to make an ally out of what you're really thinking during sex, and much more

With many proven exercises to "electrify" your sex life, heighten passion, and renew commitment, Secrets of a Passionate Marriage is sure to help your relationship reach its full potential, both in and out of bed.

©2007 David Schnarch (P)2007 David Schnarch

What members say

Average Customer Ratings

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  • 4.5 out of 5 stars
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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    4 out of 5 stars

Good book, less than good production value

This was a great book. It was pretty annoying to hear the engineers/production staff snickering in the background when the author said something funny. It felt like I was being spied on while listening.

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

The best marriage book ever written

On the face of it, Dr. Schnarch's Passionate Marriage approach (especially the part where he connects sex therapy to marital therapy) is philosophical, complicated, fluffy, and unclear. There is no step by step training in communication or negotiation. There is now teaching on understanding the differences between men and women. There's just a topography of what the lay of the land really looks like and some clues on how to get there. The prize at the bottom of the Cracker Jack box is not just great sex, or a great marriage, but discovering that what one has within themselves is a great self and that marriage is the dojo wherein that person grows and develops into all that God intended them to be. In reality it's a profoundly simple approach, that is also very very difficult to pull off, but well worth the effort and sacrifice. I imagine that most people won't have the courage to go there but I hope that I can and will. No pain, no gain; no thorns, no throne; no gall, no glory; no cross, no crown.

6 of 7 people found this review helpful

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    4 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

A good companion to Passionate Marriage

What made the experience of listening to Secrets of a Passionate Marriage the most enjoyable?

The author presented a good overview of his book of the same title.

What other book might you compare Secrets of a Passionate Marriage to and why?

This is not an audio version of the book, but it offers a broader perspective to its content.

Which character – as performed by David Schnarch – was your favorite?

Himself

Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?

The idea that our hunger for intimacy in my marriage can lead us to grow in our love and knowledge of each each other in profound dimensions.

Any additional comments?

Listeners still need to read the book. I was hoping this would include more of its content. I read the book a a few years ago, and I hoped an audio book would make it easier to share it with my wife. Car travel presents a good opportunity in this regard.

4 of 5 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

This is a life raft

I listened to this book today and it was like a healing balm. Now it's time to share it with my husband. Thank you hardly seems enough

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Must read for singles & coiples alike...

Takes you on a much needed at least these days ride through healthy exchange of disagreements and copaceticly expressing your thoughts and desires.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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    2 out of 5 stars
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    2 out of 5 stars

Here's my issue with this recording...

This was not a book. It was a lecture.. a rambling lecture. It was like a stream of conscious thought.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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  • JC
  • Brooklyn
  • 08-07-18

Amazing Value and Powerful Lessons

This was a surprisingly powerful book that really hit on some very interesting and useful ideas on love, sex and marriage. The cases were right on relevant and gave some great tools that can really help anyone have a better relationship. Great value for the time and money. Definitely a worthwhile read. Check it out.

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    5 out of 5 stars

great book!<br />

Really true and real stuff. thanks for the enlightenment. Snarch...you do great work! Keep going!

  • Overall
    1 out of 5 stars

Awful

So, the gist of the audio book is this: in order to be happy in your marriage and have a great sex life, ignore your need to connect with your partner. He describes marriage as a push-and-pull between the need for self autonomy/independence and desire to connect and be vulnerable. To me, and to most psychologists and marriage counselors, both of these desires are normal and healthy. I spent years in an abusive, neglectful household where one of the running themes was "we don't connect with or support each other, and those needs are immature and silly." Obviously I am not going to insist on connecting with my partner during his business meetings, but I refuse to be told that I need to "learn to self soothe" instead of sharing a moment with my partner or talking and feeling close. Literally all the research on healthy attachment in partners points to the exact opposite of this man's advice. "Spend more time apart" is peculiar advice for couples trying to maintain that spark, but if it works for you, that's great. As for me, my husband and I stopped listening after the first 40 minutes because it was that upsetting and illogical to us both.

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    4 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

interesting look at relationships.

it took me a couple times to understand what he was saying. once I really understood, then I was about to make some changes.

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  • Avani
  • 01-12-17

A daring approach to relationship growth

This book gave me a fresh new perspective on conflict, communication, sex and self development and How it's all connected. The biggest ahah I got was ...the biggest mistake we can make is avoiding conflict because we can use it to learn how to manage our own anxieties instead of needing our partner to sooth us, this setting them free and this can create fundamental change. Keeping the peace is actually risking the future of our relationship.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Cherie
  • 08-18-18

Truly life changing material

Loved this book - should be a must read for every couple if they want to transcend their relationship with not just their partner but themselves as well.