The Five Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts

By: Gary Chapman

Narrated by: Gary Chapman

Length: 4 hrs and 46 mins

Publisher's summary

Dr. Gary Chapman identifies five basic languages of love and then guides couples towards a better understanding of their unique languages of love. Learn to speak and understand your mate's love language, and in no time you will be able to effectively love and truly feel loved in return. Skillful communication is within your grasp!

Download the accompanying reference guide.

©2005 Gary Chapman (P)2005 Oasis Audio LLC

Critic reviews

• 2005 Audie Award Winner, Personal Development/Motivational

" "Whether your marriage needs a tune-up or a major overhaul, these are powerful prescriptions delivered by a genial, wise man." (AudioFile)

must read book for EVERYONE

story isn't great and it's longer than it needs to be but the information and examples are relevant to and important for application in daily life

Could be even shorter

This book could be boiled down to "figure out what your partner likes, and do more of that for them".

No, seriously, that's essentially it.

The author suggests that people like to receive love in one of five main ways: words of affirmation, quality time, physical touch. acts of service, receiving gifts.

I had heard of this concept years ago and thought it a reasonably good idea, but saw no need into reading the book. and honestly, the book doesn't add a whole lot. The concepts are pretty easy to explain. But just to clear up a few misconceptions:
1) to some extent, these can apply to other interpersonal relationships, not just romantic ones
2) everyone likely needs a minimum amount of each of these love languages, to some extent. Most people would be unhappy if they never spent time together or never had any physical contact, for example. But the question is, beyond a moderate amount of each language, which does someone really thrive on?
3) gifts aren't about being greedy. It's about attaching a lot of sentimental value to physical objects. Someone who has gifts as their primary love language would treasure a handmade card from their child, or the necklace grandma passed down, or that cheap souvenir their partner bought in the airport.

I'm not certain five love languages is comprehensive or nuanced enough. And the author speaks only to the way people like to RECEIVE love - not how they like to show affection. This is because the author doesn't care how you like to show affection. If your partner needs something that you are uncomfortable giving - too bad, suck it up and do it. I think that's unfortunate. I feel people can benefit from understanding how they and their partner enjoy sharing affection. It could also be useful when considering potential partners, to make the most optimal matches.

I don't care for the author's overly religious viewpoint. And he hints strongly at the disturbing belief that people should never, ever get divorced, even in the case of abusive relationships. He doesn't come right out and say that, but from reading between the lines I feel that's his opinion, especially in the part about mending a relationship with someone who hates you.

So again: talk to your partner. Figure out how they like to be treated. Do those things for them. If the five love languages give you some talking points to start with, great. Beyond that, I'm not confident this book adds value.

Amazing

I gained so much from this book! I highly recommend it! I think every person who reads it will walk away with a sense that everything is going to be okay, because you now have the knowledge to love people in their love language.

Mind blown

I can’t wait to listen to the next editions.. I felt like I was getting helped and healed definitely listening to this again.

eye opening

loved thia book so much. i discovered my love language. worth buying it
so much wisdom.

Wish I had found this book sooner!

I enjoyed this book and the experience so much. I found it to be incredibly insightful and have already started applying what I’ve learned. I recommend it to everyone

Great listen

Lots of knowledge though the stories are all of older couples. I feel it just need more younger couple scenarios and situations. Maybe needs a revision.

Love again!

I have already implemented some of the things I learned from this book, as has my husband. We are loving it! I am so excited to reread it and catch things I didn’t before so I can try them. I also loved hearing about how far forgiveness goes in a relationship. I feel confident we can get through anything!

By the way, we are only in our early twenties, but have experienced a very traumatic event together. It caused a lot of shifts in our relationship and patterns that were difficult to break. We are now unraveling those patterns and rebuilding stronger than ever.

Great advice.

There's a lot of great info in this book. I wished I would have read before getting married.

Awakening to love ❤️

This book has taught me a very simple lesson - love people how they want to be loved and tell them how you want to be loved.