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How to Become the Primary Narcissistic Supply to Your Narcissist: Covert Tactics to a Better Relationship in a Narcissist Epidemic
- Transcend Mediocrity, Book 122
- Narrated by: Valerie Clark
- Length: 34 mins
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Publisher's summary
Many people who have dated or chosen to marry narcissistic people come to me for help. They need to know how to relate to their narcissists. They must learn how to stay out of the lines of fire of the narcissists. They are stuck in cycles of abuse and manipulation, with seemingly no end in sight. They are distraught at the possibility of continuing the relationships, but they are also at a loss as to how to continue on without their partners.
A relationship with a narcissistic and self-absorbed person doesn't have to end. Despite the person being extremely immature and deficient in social, cognitive, and communication skills, he often still deserves to be loved and to belong. After all, acceptance and belonging are two of the most basic needs of human beings. Most humans deserve to feel some sense of acceptance and belonging, even if they have made mistakes or are immature in how they relate to others.
Narcissists make many mistakes, and they often don't know how to relate to other people. The more mistakes a narcissist makes in regard to relating to others, the bleaker and more dismal his outlook on life becomes. It is no wonder a narcissist will begin to have a conduct disorder, an adjustment disorder, or mental health issues. Even if narcissists want to relate in positive ways to others, experiences have shown that they cannot do so without a great deal of pain and frustration. And thus they might give up on relating positively with anyone at all.
But how does one begin to have a healthy relationship with a narcissist? Don't narcissists generally destroy any ability to have safe and healthy relationships by their very narcissistic natures? Doesn't their self-absorbed behavior conflict with the very acts of giving and intimacy that are necessary in an intimate relationship? Most of the time, a relationship with a narcissist cannot reach levels of personal security and freedom that are experienced in healthy relationships.
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The identity comes first: Evie Porter. Once she’s given a name and location by her mysterious boss Mr. Smith, she learns everything there is to know about the town and the people in it. Then the mark: Ryan Sumner. The last piece of the puzzle is the job. Evie isn’t privy to Mr. Smith’s real identity, but she knows this job will be different. Ryan has gotten under her skin, and she’s starting to envision a different sort of life for herself. But Evie can’t make any mistakes—especially after what happened last time.
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What’s The lie?
- By Luke Schafer on 01-13-24
By: Ashley Elston
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Maybe This Time
- By: Cara Bastone
- Narrated by: Zoë Chao, Noah Reid, Josh Hurley, and others
- Length: 5 hrs and 45 mins
- Original Recording
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Romance can be a little complicated when you get sucked into a wormhole. Just ask high school English teacher June Flint. One little solar flare happens and suddenly you find yourself 85 years in the future. Eighty-five years from your dream job. Your ailing mother whose only companion in this world is you. Your favorite stuffed-crust pizza from DeLucia’s on Sunday nights. But when June’s cell phone inexplicably picks up a signal, she’s able to call back to the present—more specifically, four weeks before she accidentally time traveled.
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Clean comfort romance
- By GeriatricMillennial on 05-03-24
By: Cara Bastone
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The Anxious Generation
- How the Great Rewiring of Childhood Is Causing an Epidemic of Mental Illness
- By: Jonathan Haidt
- Narrated by: Sean Pratt, Jonathan Haidt
- Length: 10 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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There is no bigger public health story now than the collapse in youth mental health. The numbers are terrifying and dominate our headlines. There has been much debate over how we got here, and what to do next, and bestselling author and social psychologist Jonathan Haidt is at the white-hot center of that discourse. Haidt has spent his career speaking wisdom and truth into the most difficult landscapes—communities polarized by politics and religion, campuses battling culture wars, and now the perfect storm contributing to a public health emergency for Gen Z.
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Empower parents, Not governments
- By Vance V. Ginn on 04-14-24
By: Jonathan Haidt
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48 Laws of Power
- By: Robert Greene
- Narrated by: Richard Poe
- Length: 23 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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Amoral, cunning, ruthless, and instructive, this piercing work distills 3,000 years of the history of power into 48 well-explicated laws. This bold volume outlines the laws of power in their unvarnished essence, synthesizing the philosophies of Machiavelli, Sun Tzu, Carl von Clausewitz, and other infamous strategists. The 48 Laws of Power will fascinate any listener interested in gaining, observing, or defending against ultimate control.
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You don't have to be a psychopath to like this.
- By Gaggleframpf on 02-25-16
By: Robert Greene
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Just for the Summer
- By: Abby Jimenez
- Narrated by: Christine Lakin, Zachary Webber, Abby Jimenez
- Length: 11 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
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Justin has a curse, and thanks to a Reddit thread, it's now all over the internet. Every woman he dates goes on to find their soul mate the second they break up. When a woman slides into his DMs with the same problem, they come up with a plan: They'll date each other and break up. Their curses will cancel each other’s out, and they’ll both go on to find the love of their lives. It’s a bonkers idea… and it just might work.
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Good but heavy
- By Maria on 04-04-24
By: Abby Jimenez
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The Accidental Dating Experiment
- By: Lauren Blakely
- Narrated by: Andi Arndt, Jacob Morgan
- Length: 6 hrs and 55 mins
- Original Recording
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Eight years ago I fell into a secret summer fling with my best friend’s little sister before our lives went in different directions. Now, I’m the grumpy to Juliet’s sunshine on a popular dating podcast we host, and when a wealthy fan gives us a charming coastal cottage as the biggest thank you ever, we head to the town where I grew up to give it a makeover. And find the house has only one bed. Located under a mirrored ceiling.
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The kind of Romance everyone needs in their collection!
- By M. Santos on 04-11-24
By: Lauren Blakely
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George Orwell’s 1984
- An Audible Original adaptation
- By: George Orwell, Joe White - adaptation
- Narrated by: Andrew Garfield, Cynthia Erivo, Andrew Scott, and others
- Length: 3 hrs and 27 mins
- Original Recording
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It’s 1984, and life has changed beyond recognition. Airstrip One, formerly known as Great Britain, is a place where Big Brother is always watching, and nobody can hide. Except, perhaps, for Winston Smith. Whilst working at the Ministry of Truth, rewriting history, he secretly dreams of freedom. And in a world where love and sex are forbidden, where it’s hard to distinguish between friend and foe, he meets Julia and O’Brien and vows to rebel.
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A Revelation!
- By wotsallthisthen on 04-07-24
By: George Orwell, and others
What listeners say about How to Become the Primary Narcissistic Supply to Your Narcissist: Covert Tactics to a Better Relationship in a Narcissist Epidemic
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- LeighAnn
- 04-21-19
Life changing
This book has just changed my life. I understand now I needed this, if you know someone like this..You must read this book. She makes it simple and easy to remember for when you need it most.
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3 people found this helpful
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- Dana
- 07-06-16
Its saying to be a doormat to the narcissist abuse
Basically you would have to endure all of the narcissist abusive behavior toward. you. Impossible! Without becoming messed up yourself is that really LOVE
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8 people found this helpful
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- Kathy Ensminger
- 10-16-21
Immensely helpful - short and sweet
Despite opinions of others- sometimes there really are good reasons to remain in a relationship with a narcissist. The tips in this book are super helpful and feel intuitively accurate in my soul. This will help me very much to not sink to his level as I have many times in the past.
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- T. Scryer
- 07-17-18
How to Avoid being abused by your NARC...
1st real hope I've found of surviving, even thriving, in a NARC relationship. Thank You!
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1 person found this helpful
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- MostlyHarmless
- 03-06-22
Realistic/practical advice
I have read dozens of books on the subject and the common approach to ‘how does one stay in a relationship with a narcissist’ is ‘here is some stuff you can try if you insist of being stupid and not leaving immediately, but really - nothing works and we know eventually you are going to want to leave anyhow’.
This is the first book that has an approach that doesn’t assume you are only interested in temporizing the situation and ‘surviving’ and has advice that assumes you want to have as much of a quality relationship as is possible in the situation.
Readers who complain that this suggests you ‘accommodate’ the narcissist do not ultimately understand narcissism. A relationship with a narcissist will NEVER be fair. Or emotionally rewarding/reciprocal in a ‘traditional’ sense. They are completely incapable of that for many reasons.
The consensus opinion is that ‘managing your expectations’ is key. This is all this book is suggesting. This is not martyrdom. It is simply that as a more emotionally mature person you will have to recognize what your narcissist’s buttons are and learn to work with that.
This is also one of the few books that doesn’t treat a narcissist like an unsalvageable dumpster fire and recognizes that under all the lashing out and blaster there is a hurt little boy/girl who has never felt loved, understood and supported.
Do you have to be the person to try to make up (and you never will) for years of emotional damage your narcissist has internalized so deeply it is now an integral part of their personality? Of course, not. But if for whatever reason this is a relationship you value and want to maintain - this is the best advice I have read. Just remember to manage expectations and expect to take care of most of your emotional needs yourself/elsewhere outside of this particular relationship.
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- Salina
- 04-01-18
Helpful, but frustrating
The content itself was alright. Unfortunately there is not really a super sweet, fair way to navigate a relationship with a narcissist. The reader of the book did a good job, but the quality of the sound was not very good. It sounded like she was moving close then moving away from the microphone.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Bethany l Bartlett
- 04-28-16
helpful
can't wait to implement with my husband as I am at a loss in my marriage..
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- SF
- 04-14-16
Interesting
Not only did this list help me figure out why my narc keeps coming back to me time and time again, but it is also helping me figure out how to create a smoother life with him going forward.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Parrish Moore
- 10-03-19
Not that convinced based on my experience..
Wasn't convinced based on my experience with my narc for 4 years ago in my life
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- Jennifer
- 12-20-16
the narrator has a easy, pleasant voice
the infrormation in the book was very helpful. most ebooks are hard for me to listen to. but this woman was calming and matter of fact in her delivery. thumbs up.
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