Everyday Cruelty

How to Deal with Its Effects without Denial, Bitterness, or Despair

By: Helen Kobek

Narrated by: Juliet Jones

Length: 4 hrs and 34 mins

Publisher's summary

Your guide to dealing with something we all experience: Everyday Cruelty.

Have you ever:

• Been bullied at school, home, or work?
• Been driven to the edge by an uncooperative telephone technical support employee?
• Had a medical appointment that was too short to be useful?
• Had to fight with an insurance company?

Everyday cruelty is everywhere there are people: in stores, on the street, in churches, at home, in doctors' offices, in schools, and at work. We experience the effects of everyday cruelty in our bodies, minds, emotions, spirits, and even in how we act in the world. It is no easy task to live with cruelty in our daily lives without falling into "the big three" of troubling responses: denial, bitterness, and despair.

Everyday Cruelty: How to Deal with Its Effects Without Denial, Bitterness, or Despair guides the listeners through the process of understanding how to deal with everyday cruelty while being fully aware of its power. By defining cruelty, examining how it affects us, delving into what makes it so painful, and then offering hundreds of strategies for dealing with it, Helen Kobek offers this promise: You can deal with the effects of everyday cruelty without pretending it is not happening, becoming resentful, or giving up.

©2014 Helen Kobek (P)2018 Helen Kobek

Inspiring analysis, inspiring strategies

The author of this book says she wrote the book she wanted to read, and that tracks with what she wrote. Everyday Cruelty is a well thought out presentation of intellectual ideas about what terrible things befall us, mixed with why these things haunt. But then there are the practical strategies for making it not all better, but much much better. I liked the narrator's voice, yet I'd have liked to have heard the writer's own voice.

This small book makes a big impact

If you pick up the print version of this book (and you probably should, so you can mark it up and dog ear pages) you might think it's light reading because it's so small. Not so. This is a packed full book that delves into things most of us don't want to think about: The cruelties of everyday life. As the author says, we drink our way away from this truth, we binge eat our way away, we yell our way away. None of that really works in the long run. So the author unpacks for the reader what cruelty, why it harms, how it harms, and then - yay, indeed - what we can do to deal with it better. She knows it won't always work, what any of us do, to try to keep ourselves from being harmed or corrupted by everyday cruelty, but it's shot, it's a start, it's a chance. I recommend this book to anyone who is alive.
The only drawback to the audio version is it's a bit hard to follow from chapter to chapter. But if you settle in and listen through, or know that you have to pay good attention (which you should anyway) you get the hang of it. The print book isbroken out into chapters more clearly. But the narrator's voice is awesome. A fine fit for the content.

Crispy clear guide book for this era of humanity

Sometimes it is important and necessary to obtain detailed description of reality instead of dancing around it, so that we have a good sense of what's going on and how to respond to it. Helen's writing and Juliet's voice transmit the clarity of wisdom and the attitude of courage to face up to this seemingly confusing and overwhelming modern day living. Worth listening!

FIGHTING CRUELTY

From the incisive opening sentence - 'Everyday cruelty is the hardest thing about being alive' - to the astonishing 303
practical strategies for dealing with everyday cruelty, this book is highly relevant and most welcome. Helen dismantles
false truisms. For example, the Nietzschean maxim 'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.' This pernicious cliche
permeates popular culture, including the title of a recent #1 pop song by Kelly Clarkson. Helen says the truth is 'What doesn't kill
you weakens you and kills you later.' Because, later, recipients of cruelty develop addictions.

In fact, Helen notes that almost everyone engages in at least one addictive behavior, much of it caused by cruelty. An
example is the heartbreaking widespread crisis of opiate addiction. We might say - contra Karl Marx who famously wrote
'Religion is the opium of the people.' - that today 'Opiates are the religion of the people.'

This and other addictions are caused by bullying, abuse, oppression, poverty and the quotidian malice that surges
through the body politic, much of it injected by masters of cruelty in the upper echelons of society. So find which of the 303
strategies you can use to cope with cruelty. From the physical - sleep well, eat well, take up activities like bowling,
archery, aikido - to the spiritual - meditation, visualization,
cultivation of gratitude - to the paradoxical - blame God/never blame God.

The vocal delivery of the narrator of this audiobook is clear, crisp and measured. I also have the hard copy in my
personal library. I highly recommend either or both versions of 'Everyday Cruelty' by Helen Kobek to all fellow
sentient beings.

Good, down-to-earth book

A good, candid review of how to deal with the problems of everyday life. this is a great book for students, of all ages, educators, parents and clinical professionals.

Much Needed For Anyone Trying to Improve Themselves

This book would be so truly valuable for everyone to listen to. It refers to many ways in which we are cruel, with or without intention. Some versions of cruelty are not blatantly obvious, and therefore, it was helpful to listen to examples made to raise awareness of how we can improve our behaviors. I do, sincerely, hope that anyone who would like to come to a better place in their lives, listen to Everyday Cruelty.

Gave me a lot to think about

This book is short in length but long on importance, for my life. Jam-packed with explanations about why cruelty hurts so much, and full of real ideas on how to got through what we exoerirnce, sometimes everyday. I can't say that I experience cruelty everyday, but when I do, I now have a book to guide me along.

Hope and great practical advise

This book is a jewel, that sheds light on the many facets of everyday cruelty. It was comforting to realize that many of the "little things" that happen to us daily are not just sensitivity but cruelty .
Helen Kobek's strong suit is the amazing variety of antidotes to these experiences . Strategies from different mindfulness practices, philosophies, spirituality, religions and psychology. Literally hundreds of short offerings - you will surely find what is fitting for you.
In addition, beautifully read by Juliet Jones.
Thank you both!

such a wonderful audio book!

I thought this title was wonderful. Full confession: I know the author (met her at my gym). I write this because I know she is the "real deal"! This book was a great read and the audio version was wonderful to listen to as well! A++++++++++!

This Book is Important to Hear Especially in Today’s Times!

This book does a huge service to those of us who are trying to figure out why cruel interactions are so very difficult and ubiquitous. Not only does it define what everyday cruelty is, but it gives concrete and compassionate strategies to deal with he ways that is affects our bodies, minds emotions, spirits and action. In fact, given the overwhelming claim ate of hate and moral destruction, I think it is a “must read” for anyone with a conscious and we need to share these concepts and ideas with our children as they make their way.

Juliet Jones’ voice is soothing and pleasant as a reader, although some of the pronunciations are slightly different than standard American English. (She is South African.) I did not find it distracting though, just noticed that it was different.