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Publisher's Summary

Harville Hendrix has illuminated the paths to healthy, loving relationships in his New York Times bestsellers Getting the Love You Want and Keeping the Love You Find. Now, he and his coauthor and wife, Helen Hunt, bring us to a new understanding of the most profound love of all -- by helping parents nurture their own development as they encourage emotional wholeness in their children.

In Giving The Love That Heals, Harville Hendrix and Helen Hunt help us explore:

Maximizer and Minimizer parents -- the defensive styles that internally shape what we say and how we interact with our children.

Safety, Support, and Structure -- how to give children what they really need from us.

Modeling Adulthood -- recovering our innate wholeness to provide a model of adulthood for our children that will preserve their innate wholeness.

In this profound, groundbreaking audiobook, Harville Hendrix and Helen Hunt lead us through an extraordinary process of growth as we help our children to become healthy, responsible, and caring people.

©1997 Harville Hendrix (P)1997 Simon & Schuster

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Adaptive Capacity Parenting

If you could sum up Giving the Love That Heals in three words, what would they be?

What made the experience of listening to Giving the Love That Heals the most enjoyable?

Perhaps the learning resonated with me, personally, because I feel it expanded my mind. I think, perhaps the author’s perspective evoked, in me, a deeper understanding, of the positive and negative communication styles, in parenting, that parents, I included, typically use, to communicate with our children.

What was one of the most memorable moments of Giving the Love That Heals?

What other book might you compare Giving the Love That Heals to and why?

I would compare the book to Janice Benson's book entitled, Black Children: Their Roots, Culture and Learning Styles. In Dr. Benson’s book, she takes the nurturing skills parents inherently bring into the parenting relationship and profoundly expand that knowledge base, into a sharper, richer, surgical application of parenting skills.

Which character – as performed by Harville Hendrix – was your favorite?



The repetitive dialogue between parents and children were most instrumental to me; there was not a particular one that blew me away over another. However, the consistent interactions kept reminding me of the positive and negative experiences, with my own child; and these examples, individually and collectively, were journeys into my reflections with my daughter and offered me a one-on-one classroom with myself, for examination and correction.

What did you learn from Giving the Love That Heals that you would use in your daily life?

Henceforth, the vision that I will bring to parenting my daughter is perpetuity. I have resolved in my mind to always look prospectively at my daughter and always to see her as the infinite life span, that she is.

Any additional comments?

Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?

Most of the book was challenging to absorb, namely because, with each conviction, there was a realization, that maybe there were times when, the absence of those parenting skills, in me, perhaps, caused me to bring grief, to my own child; and this is a thought that gives me much grief. For me, it was impossible to think that I may have caused my child pain, without causing pain, to myself.

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learning to love my children

thank you for giving us a guide in which we learn to love our children for who they are.