I am the narcissist. I suffer through my moods and my emotions. But they are not the same moods that you suffer through as an empath. I don’t suffer the same range of emotions that you suffer through. I don’t feel the depth of the love, the joy, the happiness, the satisfaction, the gratefulness, and the compassion. No. I suffer dark moods. Much darker than I will ever let on to you when you first meet me.
After you get to know me for six months or longer, you will begin to see the depth of the dark moods that I feel. You will begin to realize just how dangerous, hot, and explosive I can be. You will begin to see the light side and the dark side of me. You see much more than I am willing to show others, because you are the closest one to me. This means that you are the chosen one to be the scapegoat for my anger.
If I disperse my anger and rage to you, that means that I won’t have to do it to anyone else. I will be able to hold it together and be calm, cool and collected when I am out in public. You get to see a dark side of me that people outside of the home don’t get to see.
If I have children, they are witness to my dark moods, too, but for a different reason. I must pass on my legacy. I must teach them to be touch and untouchable in society. I must teach them that I am the king, that they are to respect me at all costs. Otherwise, they will be subjected to the same beatings and sharp tongue that I am subjecting you to. They will choose the higher ground and be my minions rather than be victims of my anger and rage.
It is safer for any children of mine (or even your children who are not mine biologically) to follow me than to butt heads with me. If any of them argue with me the way that you do, I might maim, hurt, or kill them. They know this, and thus they don’t challenge me. You challenge me, and thus I must show them that you are a peon to me and that I control you. If I don’t, I will lose control of my own household.