Regular price: $24.49

Free with 30-day trial
Membership details Membership details
  • A 30-day trial plus your first audiobook, free
  • 1 credit/month after trial – good for any book, any price
  • Easy exchanges – swap any book you don’t love
  • Keep your audiobooks, even if you cancel
  • After your trial, Audible is just $14.95/month
OR
In Cart

Publisher's Summary

What makes stepmothering so hard? And why are we, as people and a culture, so hard on stepmothers? How can we make it easier?

Stepmonster is a truly unique and groundbreaking book for women with stepchildren, men with kids who repartner, adult stepchildren, and anyone who cares about them. It is a comprehensive, cross-cultural, research-based reconsideration of stepfamily dynamics - from the perspective of the stepmother. How does she think, act, and feel, and why? Part no-holds-barred memoir of stepmothering in the trenches, part analysis of why stepmothering is tough and steps women with stepkids can take to thrive, Stepmonster has been hailed as "the thinking woman's guide to stepmothering" and "life altering", igniting conversations, controversy, and changes in how we perceive and experience stepmothering.

©2009 Wednesday Martin (P)2015 Tantor

Critic Reviews

"[Martin's] well-researched work delves into the animal world, fairy tales, psychology, and sociobiology...." (Library Journal)

What members say

Average Customer Ratings

Overall

  • 4.6 out of 5.0
  • 5 Stars
    63
  • 4 Stars
    13
  • 3 Stars
    7
  • 2 Stars
    4
  • 1 Stars
    0

Performance

  • 4.5 out of 5.0
  • 5 Stars
    59
  • 4 Stars
    10
  • 3 Stars
    2
  • 2 Stars
    5
  • 1 Stars
    2

Story

  • 4.5 out of 5.0
  • 5 Stars
    53
  • 4 Stars
    14
  • 3 Stars
    6
  • 2 Stars
    5
  • 1 Stars
    0
Sort by:
  • Overall
  • Performance
  • Story
  • Sloan
  • Elkview, West Virginia United States
  • 04-07-16

A must for stepmothers or those thinking about it.

A book of validation and understanding for the hard feelings you'll have as a stepmother.

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
  • Performance
  • Story

Downer

I wound up stopping this book about half way because I was getting about 90% doom and gloom and 10% actual advice on how to navigate new waters.

  • Overall
  • Performance
  • Story

Literally the best stepmom book ever.

If you're like me, you have had it up to here with unhelpful stepfamily advice that amounts to "Just love them like your own. You knew what you were getting into." This book is the antidote to that sort of thing. It's actually helpful. It talks about all the things we stepmoms have often learned the hard way that nobody else wants to hear about.

Have you ever made the mistake of trying to tell your husband honestly what you think of his kids' behavior, thinking he might care that they're driving you nuts in some very fixable ways? I have. I thought I was being really constructive and solution minded. He blew up on me. I was so confused by that until I read this book. Have you ever thought to yourself, "How can I be expected to love these kids who are so completely spoiled and lawless in my home? I don't even like them! I just want them to go home!"? If you have, please read this book. You're not a horrible monster. You're a normal human being who is in an extremely difficult situation. You can do it.

Even if you're one of those rare gems who actually likes your stepkids and thinks this is a really cool gig, you would get something out of this book because it explains so much about why society perceives us the way it does, and really what we're all up against, as well as a ton of historical and anthropological context that nobody else has ever explained so clearly. This book is really for every stepmom, whether you are enjoying yourself, or like me, you're struggling.

  • Overall
  • Performance
  • Story

A must read for anyone with step kids!

My wife and I have been married for four years.
I came into the marriage with two children from a previous marriage.
This book has been an incredibly eye opening glimpse into the struggles of being a step parent.
A must read for anyone considering taking on the responsibility of step children.

  • Overall
  • Performance
  • Story

An absolute must read!

If you are anywhere on the step family spectrum you should sincerely read this book! I feel that it has changed my life!

  • Overall
  • Performance
  • Story

A must read

Anyone who finds themselves single and even contemplating dating and anyone who is contemplating dating someone with children. There are more than 2 people who play a role in the success of such a relationship and knowing how to manage expectations in advance had got to help.

I only wish that I had this book years ago.

  • Overall
  • Performance
  • Story

Glad I am not alone

Where does Stepmonster rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?

It list pretty high. Mainly because it pertains to my own life and what I am dealing with.

What did you like best about this story?

That I learned that I am not alone in what I feel and what I deal with as a stepmother. I don't even like to be called stepmother. I am way more comfortable being called a step-parent.

Which character – as performed by Cris Dukehart – was your favorite?

Not sure this matters for this book.

What’s the most interesting tidbit you’ve picked up from this book?

That many woman feel the same way I do and that it is ok to not love or even like your stepchild(ren). You do have to be fair, responsible, and kind...which I am. I just don't have to feel bad that I don't have a bond or feelings for the child. Like the book says...you fell in love with the man. You did not fall in love with his children. Some get luck and can develop a bond and even love (maybe), but it is nice to know that it isn't as popular as society makes us think. Being a good parent is important. Having feelings for "said" child is not a requirement. It lifted a lot of pressure/guilt.

Any additional comments?

If you are a step-parent... especially a female and struggle with your feelings about your stepchildren....get this book. Good for men too who are in the same situation. If you can get your spouse to listen with you that is even better. It will help them understand better too.

1 of 2 people found this review helpful

Sort by:
  • Overall
  • Flora Di Medio
  • 06-12-16

Stepmonster

I urge all Step Mothers to read this book. It saved my Sanity and give me tremendous relief knowing the hell I was going through was normal. Wednesday Martin has done us all an incredible service writing this book.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful