Things I Wish I'd Known Before We Got Married

By: Gary Chapman

Narrated by: Chris Fabry

Length: 3 hrs and 44 mins

Publisher's summary

Before you plan your wedding, plan your marriage! Wish you could know what you’re getting into when you say “I do”? Now, with Things I Wish I’d Known Before We Got Married, you can. Dr. Gary Chapman, #1 New York Times best-selling author of The 5 Love Languages™, has spent the last thirty-five years counseling couples. In Things I Wish I’d Known Before We Got Married, he shares what he and these couples have learned from experience. Among the twelve things you should know: that being in love is not enough to make a successful marriage, that romantic love has two stages (and how to make the transition), that mutual sexual fulfillment is not automatic, and that personality profoundly affects behavior. The stakes on marriage are high, but the rewards of preparing are even higher. Whether you’re single or dating, this audio can be your relationship blueprint and help you decide if and when you’re ready to tie the knot. If you’re engaged, even recently married, it will help you examine your relationship foundation and learn the skills necessary for building a successful marriage. Things I Wish I’d Known Before We Got Married was written to help you realize your goal of marital happiness. But don’t just listen to it - experience it. Grapple with the practical tips and ideas discussed, honestly share your thoughts and feelings, respect each other’s opinions, and find workable solutions to your differences. The more you do so, says Chapman, the more you will be prepared for marriage.

Download the accompanying reference guide.

©2010 Oasis Audio; 2010 Gary Chapman

Useful and Practical!

What made the experience of listening to Things I Wish I'd Known Before We Got Married the most enjoyable?

It contains real-life issues and real-life experiences. I'll listen over and over again.

What’s an idea from the book that you will remember?

1. That being in love is not an adequate foundation for building a successful marriage

2. That romantic love has two stages

3. The saying: "Like mother, like daughter" and "Like father, like son" is not myth

4. That forgiveness is not a feeling

5. That toilets are not self-cleaning

6. That we needed a plan for handling our money

7. That mutual sexual fulfillment is not automatic

8. That I was marrying into a family

Useful only for the most sheltered

This book assumes three things about you: 1) that you are so inexperienced and naive about relationships, that you aren't aware that euphoric infatuation doesn't last forever, you haven't had sex with your partner, and you are oblivious to your parnter's true personality and habits; 2) that you have never lived on your own and are oblivious to the basics of paying bills and cleaning a house; and 3) that you are Christian and are willing to accept answers like "turn to God to resolve conflicts" as legitimate solutions.

If you don't qualify the above, this book is rudimentary at best, and had little to say that simple experience of being in a few relationships hadn't already taught me. It also seems to skip over important issues like how much together time to ask of your partner when you live together. I'd return it if I could.

I wish I knew

I wish I'd know these things while dating before I got married. This would have changed the course of many relationships!!! I would have been equipped to successfully be able to deal with such a serious commitment! Trust me singles when I say, "don't take this information lightly or for granted. You will be so much further along in your relationship so it can be a successful one or prevent you from being in an unsuccessful one. YOU WILL ALWAYS NEED TO LEARN. This book is good for married couples to review who have had no training!!! Like the majority of those I know. People get married and just go day by day. They don't enjoy their marriage to the fullest by building it up. What a waist! I'm sure that the keys topics that are touched here have a great amount to do about it. I know it did for me. It's not enough to just be married. We are still alive so it's not too late. Equipping your marriage to be successful is PRICELESS! Great book for singles to prepare, engaged to equip and married couples to review and reconstruct some damaged or undeveloped areas. God bless you for an awesome tool, each chapter is like a little teaser!

Must read for singles, dating and married couples

I found the book very enlightening and I am 100 percent certain that you will learn something. I liked the book so much that I am going to purchase the actual book. This book is worth every penny and should be read by singles as well as dating and married couples. I hope you enjoy and learn as much as I did.

So glad I read it.

I'm in a serious dating relationship, not yet married. We're thinking of engagement and I think this book helped us iron out a lot of our reservations with regards to marriage or readiness for marriage. Highly recommend it!

Fantastic Book

Although I had listened to the book after I was married, I found the book very enlightening. My favorite part was the five love languages. I recommend that everyone reads his book to have a clue on relationships.

Best Marriage Advice Book

I have read quite a few marriage prep books and this book had the most real life advice not just the fluffy or the in theory stuff. My fiance and I talked a lot after each chapter. I definitely recommend it!

Awesome!!!

This is a must read book, even if you are not getting married anytime soon. Everybody that believes will get married in the future will benefit greatly by appying the concepts of this book. It's great! I was so hooked I read it in one day!

Some Common Sense, Some I Never Thought About

Would you listen to Things I Wish I'd Known Before We Got Married again? Why?

I do plan to listed to this again, I think that by listening to it again, I will get even more out of the book

What did you like best about this story?

I think what I like best about it is going back into the early married life, the stories he shared and the lessons learned. It was a mix of humor and stories told.

What insight do you think you’ll apply from Things I Wish I'd Known Before We Got Married?

Not to take everything so seriously, talk about things/issues before they fester.

More for younger, Christian couples.

I don't fall into the demographic I think this book is for, but I did find a couple of his points useful - particular regarding finances. I wish he had gone more in that direction. Most of his points can be solved with good communication and living together before the marriage to make sure you're compatible. i know that goes against the Christian narrative, but it might be a nice move considering the enormity of the decision.

A must for every engaged couple

Where does Things I Wish I'd Known Before We Got Married rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?

This is a book to be listened to over an over again

What did you like best about this story?

Its practicality is mind-blowing.

What does Chris Fabry bring to the story that you wouldn’t experience if you had only read the book?

The fact that what I am going through is not peculiar to me.

Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?

All aspects of the book are relevant

must read

It was an easy book to comprehend straight to the point eye opening to things you wouldn't consider it will make a big deal later
definitely will read again

much needed.

just what the young and new generation needed. A book to own for life.

Awesome Book

A must read for both those planning to be married and those that are married too.

Useful guides

Every person who are dating and considering marriage should read this! Very organised analyses and useful guides!

Really helpful insight into the world of dating

Discusses a variety of topics that people who are dating/married struggle with, with the perspective that it is better to sort out differences between the man and woman prior to marriage. If the issues are insurmountable then the mature and wise decision to make is to the end the relationship whilst it is in the dating phase. Book also gives a really helpful set of questions to ask your dating partner which I will personally be using to assess whether I can survive marriage with a prospective person.

Loved it so needed

The book gives great inside to a lot of things that one can work on before getting into a relationship even whilst getting getting ready for marriage and during

An absolute must for any couple to be

This book along with the 5 love languages were eye openers. I highly recommend them to singles dating and couples looking to get married. These two books will highlight things and areas of your relationship you might not have considered. I strongly plead to all looking to get married or dating to take advantage of these two books. Take it from me, your future self will thank you.

Fantastic listen!

So very insightful even for those who are already in a Marriage! It just goes to show you that you are not alone in your thinking around the contentious and not so contentious issues a marriage will bring and most importantly, the way in which we resolve these. Mr Chapman - you have done it again!

Excellent Insight

This audiobook offers an excellent insight in preparing for a marriage. This book not only embraces the difference between partners but at the same time lets you reflect of what are the non-negotiable things that you can't compromise on.