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I’m Glad You’re Dead
- Preternatural Chronicles, Book 1
- Narrated by: Luke Daniels
- Length: 8 hrs and 39 mins
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Publisher's summary
My name is John Cook, and my life began the day my heart stopped beating.
You meet the most interesting men in medieval prisons. This one time, I met a guy who offered me immortality for the low, low price of changing my diet. I didn’t read the fine print. Because, he wasn’t talking about a gluten-free diet. More like hemoglobin-full.
And now, I’m a friggin’ vampire with five centuries of pop culture references.
Granted, at the time, I was listening to the dying screams of my mother and father being burned and eviscerated alive just outside the rusty bars of the prison cell, and my new best friend was offering me my only real chance at saving my own life and avenging my parents’ murderers - some day.
Except, my first chance at vengeance took about 500 years, and I had to wade through oceans of sin and violence, blackening my soul - and my already dark sense of humor - beyond redemption until I met Father Thomes, a Roman Catholic priest, in present-day Houston.
Papa Thomes taught me how to use my dark curse to fight for the good guys. Like Alfred and Robin did for Batman - except we straight up murder Jokers and Two-Faces.
Biteman and Pope’n.
We stand up for the downtrodden, the forgotten, and the neglected.
By ex-sanguinating the wicked in horrific, truly imaginative ways and having a grand ol’ time doing it. You know what they say about doing what you love...
But our party is soon cut short when we learn the End of Days is just around the corner, and that the fine print of my contract might have hidden a few other tidbits. Like the fact that I was central to kicking off the apocalypse and that the archdemons will stop at nothing to make sure the dude abides by the terms of his contract.
I guess I need a lawyer.
Get ready to laugh at extreme violence. I know I will. If you’re not laughing, you’re learning.
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Why does the author make it so hard to like the main character
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By: D. J. Molles
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High Steaks
- Freelance Familiars
- By: Daniel Potter
- Narrated by: Jonathan Waters
- Length: 10 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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When the dice are loaded, the claws come out. Rudy and Thomas have landed in Sin City, but not on all four paws. The Talking Animal Union is determined to trip up the Freelance Familiars and entangle Thomas in a game where Death holds all the cards. But Thomas can’t focus merely on saving himself. A vampire stalks the refugees of Grantsville, and to save his friends - and his own neck - Thomas has to put more than just himself on the line. The odds are raw and bloody in Vegas.
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Enjoyable series so far
- By Ross on 01-10-21
By: Daniel Potter
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The Bar at the End of the World
- The Watchers, Book 1
- By: Tom Abrahams
- Narrated by: Jonathan Davis
- Length: 10 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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Zeke is a bad guy. He didn’t choose to be. It’s just who he is. It’s who he has to be to survive in a post-apocalyptic world where trust is as scarce as water. He's got nobody. No family. No friends. And he left behind the woman he loved for her own good. But it's time to change. After a brush with death far out in the wasteland, he decides he's done risking his life to help his greedy bosses control who gets to drink water and when. Now, he's stranded in a bar in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by the perfect kind of ruffians who can help him go back and make things right.
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Meh story, great narrator.
- By ILikePizza on 04-30-20
By: Tom Abrahams
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Black Dog Blues
- The Kai Gracen Series, Book 1
- By: Rhys Ford
- Narrated by: Greg Tremblay
- Length: 8 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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Ever since being part of the pot in a high-stakes poker game, elfin outcast Kai Gracen figures he used up his good karma when Dempsey, a human Stalker, won the hand and took him in. Following the violent merge of Earth and Underhill, the human and elfin races are left with a messy, monster-ridden world, and Stalkers are the only cavalry willing to ride to someone's rescue when something shadowy appears.
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Not the story for me.
- By Heather K (Dentist in my Spare Time) on 06-08-15
By: Rhys Ford
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Dawn of Chaos
- Age of Madness - A Kurtherian Gambit Series
- By: Daniel Willcocks, Michael Anderle
- Narrated by: Emily Beresford
- Length: 7 hrs and 25 mins
- Unabridged
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Performance
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Story
Caitlin finally gets the chance to explore what's outside of the walls of the town she's been trapped in and finds vampires, werewolves, and zombie-like creatures.
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disappointed
- By me.. on 01-10-23
By: Daniel Willcocks, and others
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The Scarlet Dragon Saga, Books 1-3
- An Urban Fantasy Adventure
- By: J.P. Rice
- Narrated by: Liz Brand
- Length: 19 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
The slumbering dragon has awakened. Ten years ago in a demonic underworld, my enemies almost killed me. With the help of a disguised demon serving his own agenda, I survived. Barely...After a decade off the supernatural grid, I needed to sip from Goibniu's Chalice of Agelessness to restore my eternal youth. What started as a quick trip changed dramatically when Goibniu uttered those two magic words...Retirement was fun while it lasted.
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Good Series
- By Daniel Delgado on 04-23-20
By: J.P. Rice
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Widow Town
- By: Joe Hart
- Narrated by: Jay Snyder
- Length: 10 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
A breakthrough research project has detected an active gene present in all known psychopaths and developed a vaccine to make it completely dormant. Society has rejoiced the extinction of the sociopathic mind. There hasn’t been a serial killing in America in over 40 years. Sheriff MacArthur Gray resides in the future but lives in the past. His world views have chased him from a large metropolis to his home town, but there is no sanctuary to be found after he arrives. Because people are dying and only he can see the truth. A psychopath has somehow survived and is thriving.
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widow Town
- By Michelle on 07-25-19
By: Joe Hart
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interesting
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When they hanged mage Baron Homburg and his family for treason, they missed one of his sons. The fourth son, ten-year-old Dale, witnessed the execution of his family, and something inside him broke. Two things happened that day: one, Dale became a borderline sociopath, and two, his mage abilities manifested at almost full strength, especially his wood or forest magic. That night he used his new wood magic to hang the earl who ordered the killing of his family.
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Loved it
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The gods are dying. But for one man, death is only the beginning. Murdered as a ritual sacrifice, amateur thief and professional charmer Dustin Graves mysteriously survives, finding himself gifted with strange, dark magic. Then more dead bodies turn up. Some are human, but one is a god of the old world, slain at his own doorstep.
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Great narration. Story fell short for me.
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Great Story Ruined by Awful Cartoonish Narration
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I really wanted to like this…
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Great narration. Story fell short for me.
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A tragic event called Violet Rain, or Purple Rain led to billions of deaths, civilization collapsing, and monsters roaming the planet. The danger of myths, legends, monsters, and portals to other worlds appearing on Earth has resulted in a surge of magical understanding and technological advancement.
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An awesome new direction for Blaise Corvin’s writing.
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Return of the Runebound Professor
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Lives are a currency, and Noah Vines is rich. With countless variations of runic magic to discover and with death serving as only a painful soul-wound rather than a final end, Noah finally has a chance to wander the lands of the living once more. This time around, he plans to get strong enough to make sure that he never has to wait around in the afterlife again.
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Bit disappointing
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Besieged
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In ancient Egypt, Atticus agrees to raid a secret chamber underneath the library of Alexandria, dodging deadly traps, only to learn that on-site security includes two members of the Egyptian pantheon.
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Short or full-length, Hearne & Daniels OWN it all
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I want to be honest but not hurtful
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Engines. Genetically modified warriors that keep the great Nova Alliance war machine churning against the enemy Coalition. Most days, Engines are all that stand between salvation and chaos. Led by legendary Engine Captain Akira Hayashi, Shadow Squad has fought on the frontlines for a decade. They are on the brink of victory when the Coalition launches a series of desperate and devastating attacks that cripple the Nova Alliance restoration sites vital to save the dying planet.
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Kicking New Series Opener! Wow!
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Son of the Black Sword
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After the War of the Gods, the demons were cast out and fell to the world. Mankind was nearly eradicated by the seemingly unstoppable beasts until the gods sent the great hero, Ramrowan, to save them. He united the tribes, gave them magic, and drove the demons into the sea. Ever since, the land has belonged to man, and the oceans have remained an uncrossable hell, leaving the continent of Lok isolated.
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Woo'd & Won
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Ball Lightning
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Overall
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When Chen’s parents are incinerated before his eyes by a blast of ball lightning, he devotes his life to cracking the secret of the mysterious natural phenomenon. His search takes him to stormy mountaintops, an experimental military weapons lab, and an old Soviet science station. The more he learns, the more he comes to realize that ball lightning is just the tip of a new frontier in particle physics. Although Chen’s quest provides a purpose for his life, his reasons for chasing his elusive quarry come into conflict with soldiers and scientists who have motives of their own.
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if you loved the three body problem . a must
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Silvers
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Overall
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Performance
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Humans have been pushed to the brink of extinction by an ever-evolving demonic threat. Portals are opening faster than ever, Towers are bursting into the skies, and Dungeons are being mined below the last safe havens of society. The demons are winning. Quest Academy stands defiantly against them as a place to train the next generation of Heroes. The Guild Association is holding the line but is in dire need of new blood and the powerful abilities they could bring to the battlefront. To be the saviors that humanity needs, they need to surpass the limits of those that came before them.
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Okay premise, well written, poorly thought out.
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Mark of the Fool
- A Progression Fantasy Epic
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Story
After his parents died, Alex Roth had one desire: become a wizard. Through hard work, he was accepted into the University of Generasi, the world’s greatest academy of wizardry.... Fate, however, had another plan. On his 18th birthday, he is Marked by prophecy as one of his kingdom’s five Heroes, chosen to fight the Ravener, his land’s great enemy. But his brand is "The Fool". Worst of the marks.
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Finally a Mc that’s not dumb or overpowered
- By Anonymous User on 09-22-22
By: J.M. Clarke
What listeners say about I’m Glad You’re Dead
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- richard henney
- 06-26-20
warning do not eat while listening to this book
This book is amazing,funny and beyond entertaining. Half way through book 1 I went and bought the rest of Hunters book.
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5 people found this helpful
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- chris
- 01-26-22
6 STARS
MC is a vampire who fights for good. MC has cool magical powers, that are more than most vampire types have, but are still in line with a vampire: NO SPLOILERS.
Setting: our modern world, but with daemons, vamps, etc.
LOTS of action & smart assz comedy. Fast paced story, but it also has depth. GREAT performance, with MANY different voices / accents.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Bennah
- 03-13-20
Vampire Deadpool
This was a fun story that grabbed my attention right away. There were some very laugh out loud moments as well as some "get ya in the feels". Going to look for hook 2 now
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1 person found this helpful
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- J.Guys
- 02-04-22
This book is for all Vampire Nerds!! It’s Solid Gold!!
Spectacular!!! A fun new look at The Vampire Nerd!! Luke Daniels brought these characters to life in the best way possible!! I’ll be spending time with the funny and sarcastic “Jon” as I devour this series. This is the Male Version of Betsy the Vampire Queen in all the best ways!!
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1 person found this helpful
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- Surgecj7
- 01-03-21
Refreshing
I loved this book and am hooked. The “wit” of John gets a little much at times, but I can look past that. It was refreshing to read a book with almost as much foul language that I use on a daily basis. Lol!!! I can’t wait to delve further I to this new universe I have stumbled across!!!
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- ken
- 10-05-23
gave it a shot
so glad I did.....absolutely one of the funniest books I have listened to yet.....one to the next one in the series
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- spicyringlets
- 10-08-20
Entertaining and Exciting
This book was fun with its sarcastic and sometimes spastic main character. Even in the most serious moments, he added a little humor. There was plenty of excitement and intrigue to keep me interested the whole time.
The narrator did a perfect job! I usually gravitate toward female main characters and stories with a little romance, but I thoroughly enjoyed this book! I'm interested to see what happens next!
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2 people found this helpful
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- Ryan
- 03-02-21
Luke Daniels’ Best Work
I’ve always been impressed with Mr. Daniels voice talent. But here we get the full range across the spectrum. If you’re a Luke fan, sink your fangs in and indulge your self on this sweet sexy morsel.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Ron
- 06-11-20
Not your Sparkly Vampire
This is a fun light hearted series set in a world where all kinds of supernatural creatures exist. If you like Kevin Hearne’s Iron Druid Chronicles then I would say this is must read. This series has lots similarities in that the characters are sassy and full of life. Plus it has Luke Daniels who has quickly become one of my favorite narrators on audible. So far there are 4 books and 2 novellas in the PRETERNATURAL CHRONICLES series.
Book 0.5 DELIVERANCE
Book 1 I’M GLAD YOU’RE DEAD
Book 2 DAWN AND QUARTERED
Book 3 SHADOW OF A DOUBT
Book 3.5. MOONLIGHT EQUILIBRIUM
Book 4. MOUTH OF MADNESS
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1 person found this helpful
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- ssaraga123
- 03-30-20
EXCELLENT!!!
loved the story!
the narrator is perfect for this book!
love the movie reference and smartass!
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1 person found this helpful