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Insults! Insults! The Best 400 Insults/Jokes on the Planet
- Uncensored & Censored
- Narrated by: Millian Quinteros
- Length: 50 mins
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Publisher's summary
Gone are the days when formality and manners were mandatory. Today, a person's communication skills and charisma are highly dependent in his sense of humor. It may sound crazy, but jokes and insults are effective ways to gain control of social situations, but they must be used with responsibility.
With this being said, there has to be a reason why you want to learn insults, but remember that your reason should never be to make someone else feel miserable - at least not for a very long time.
People use insults and jokes all the time. There are even social events arranged specifically so that people can throw insults at each other for entertainment. You may not necessarily be aiming to participate in such events, but insults can still be used to shut someone down. They can also lighten up dull and boring situations - if used properly.
You'll have access to every type of insult: insults for arrogant people, insults for stupid people, ugly people, and more and much more.
Here are a few:
- Did you know that your birth certificate is an apology letter from a condom company?
- I bet your brain is expensive, since it was hardly used
- You're so stupid that you got hit by a car; it was parked.
- Your face is something only a mother could love.
- Dude, your teeth are so yellow that when you smile, cars slow down.
Download now to receive over 100 more jokes!
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- Length: 5 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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After 68-year-old David Granger crashes his BMW, medical tests reveal a brain tumor that he readily attributes to his wartime Agent Orange exposure. He wakes up from surgery repeating a name no one in his civilian life has ever heard - that of a Native American soldier whom he was once ordered to discipline. David decides to return something precious he long ago stole from the man he now calls Clayton Fire Bear.
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Kinda like Gran Torino..
- By H Harris on 06-02-18
By: Matthew Quick
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I Don’t Care about Your Band
- What I Learned from Indie Rockers, Trust Funders, Pornographers, Felons, Faux-Sensitive Hipsters, and Other Guys I’ve Dated
- By: Julie Klausner
- Narrated by: Julie Klausner
- Length: 6 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
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In the tradition of Cynthia Heimel and Chelsea Handler, and with the boisterous iconoclasm of Amy Sedaris, Julie Klausner's candid and funny debut I Don't Care about Your Band sheds light on the humiliations we endure to find love - and the lessons that can be culled from the wreckage. I Don't Care about Your Band posits that lately the worst guys to date are the ones who seem sensitive. It's the jerks in nice guy clothing, not the players in Ed Hardy, who break the hearts of modern girls.
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Shopping for Men at the Wrong Mall
- By Pamela Harvey on 01-02-13
By: Julie Klausner
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BRAVE
- By: Rose McGowan
- Narrated by: Rose McGowan
- Length: 6 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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In a strange world where Rose McGowan was continually on display, stardom soon became a personal nightmare of constant exposure and sexualization. Rose escaped into the world of her mind, something she had done as a child, and into high-profile relationships. Every detail of her personal life became public, and the realities of an inherently sexist industry emerged with every script, role, public appearance, and magazine cover. The Hollywood machine packaged her as a sexualized bombshell, hijacking her image and identity and marketing them.
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I always wondered what it was like to be Rose
- By Bobbie J Daniel on 03-01-18
By: Rose McGowan
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Dave Barry's Complete Guide to Guys
- By: Dave Barry
- Narrated by: John Ritter
- Length: 3 hrs and 18 mins
- Abridged
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The American guy is not to be confused with a husband, father, hunk, or intellectual, says guy expert Dave Barry. Published just in time (the American guy faces extinction due to feminism, the men's movement, and stricter sanitation laws), this guide gives women helpful advice for understanding Him (or It) and offers men useful tips on remembering the names of their children and other dilemmas of life.
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I laughed all the way through
- By Alan Rither on 08-10-04
By: Dave Barry
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Dirty Thirty
- By: Asa Akira
- Narrated by: Veronica Worthington
- Length: 5 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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As she contemplates turning 30 years old while still being in the adult film trade, Asa Akira, author of the best-seller Insatiable, delves into her past, present, and future, exploring the events that brought her to where she is now and the surprising and insightful plans she has for her future. Internationally known as a porn star, Akira's perceptive, funny, and straightforward writings on love, sex, death, marriage, and celebrity come together in a surprising book of essays.
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this was fun I'm going to buy her other book 2
- By Sir Lawrence on 01-09-19
By: Asa Akira
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A Practical Handbook for the Boyfriend
- By: Felicity Huffman, Patricia Wolff
- Narrated by: Shelly Frasier
- Length: 4 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Most dating books are written for women - what a mistake that is. Women know how to date....It's men who need the help! At last: a blithe, bold, and bawdy guide to building a better boyfriend.
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Can't Stop Laughing
- By Marshall on 06-13-07
By: Felicity Huffman, and others
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Does This Baby Make Me Look Straight?
- Confessions of a Gay Dad
- By: Dan Bucatinsky
- Narrated by: Dan Bucatinsky
- Length: 5 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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In 2005, Dan Bucatinsky and his partner, Don Roos, found themselves in an L.A. delivery room, decked out in disposable scrubs from shower cap to booties, to welcome their adopted baby girl - launching their frantic yet memorable adventures into fatherhood. Two and a half years later, the same birth mother - a heroically generous, pack-a-day teen with a passion for Bridezilla marathons and Mountain Dew - delivered a son into the couple’s arms.
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A Parenting Book with Humor and Heart
- By The Reading Date on 02-05-14
By: Dan Bucatinsky
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This Is Gonna Hurt
- Music, Photography, and Life Through the Distorted Lens of Nikki Sixx
- By: Nikki Sixx
- Narrated by: Nikki Sixx
- Length: 3 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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This Is Gonna Hurt: Music, Photography And Life Through The Distorted Lens Of Nikki Sixx, is all Nikki Sixx. It is a collection of compelling photography and stories that capture the rage, love, optimism, darkness, and determination that shape his work.
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MUST HAVE!!
- By Yvonne on 05-28-11
By: Nikki Sixx
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Easy for You to Say
- By: John Melendez
- Narrated by: John Melendez
- Length: 6 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Easy For You To Say is "Stuttering" John Melendez's memoir of his childhood being bullied in school for his stutter; his years as an on-air personality with The Howard Stern Show; and his subsequent 10-year career as a writer and on-air announcer for Jay Leno's Tonight Show. It details his famously acerbic relationships with celebrities he interviewed/insulted (Raquel Welch once punched him in the face). In the audiobook, Howard Stern emerges as a surprisingly mean, stingy, and megalomaniacal boss - and Jay Leno as a seeming sufferer from OCD.
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Was expecting more
- By Amazon Customer on 10-25-18
By: John Melendez
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Ask Wendy
- By: Wendy Williams
- Narrated by: Wendy Williams
- Length: 5 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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On TV, Wendy only has a few minutes to respond to each audience member, but in Ask Wendy she goes deeper, answering questions sourced from viewers across the country. No question is off-limits and no situation is too outrageous for her to take on. Wendy shoots straight from those womanly hips of hers to help you manage all the crazy that comes into your life - keepin' it real by drawing on the personal experiences that have shaped her unique perspective.
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HIlarious
- By Shelley Thomas-Robinson on 10-24-17
By: Wendy Williams
What listeners say about Insults! Insults! The Best 400 Insults/Jokes on the Planet
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- J B
- 04-13-18
Mostly I've heard these before
Would you say that listening to this book was time well-spent? Why or why not?
This book served its purpose as a bit of a refresher on common insult material.
What do you think your next listen will be?
A book on joke development theory.
What do you think the narrator could have done better?
The narration was ok they did a decent job.
Did Insults! Insults! The Best 400 Insults/Jokes on the Planet inspire you to do anything?
I think a good next step would be to look into insult/joke development theory more than just examples.
Any additional comments?
I think younger people especially teens would like this as they may not have heard these insults before.
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- Shiba Lover
- 07-09-16
Awesome
This book gave me a full case of weaponry for all the people who suck in my life
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1 person found this helpful
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- Lauren
- 07-10-21
It's dull
I've heard other joke books and the narrator isn't too bad. The jokes are lame and some are just mean and not funny.
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- Benito
- 07-19-16
Nothing new
What was most disappointing about The Moma Factory’s story?
This book is full of lame, weak and cliched insults.
don't waste your time with it.
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- Holly
- 01-10-24
Unoriginal
This book is nothing more than a regurgitation of every lame joke you would expect to hear from your weird unemployed uncle. My grandmother has come up with more savage insults. If anyone in real life ever used these jokes they would come across as creepy, or mentally deficient. That was a waste of time and money.
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