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Paddle Your Own Canoe Audiobook

Paddle Your Own Canoe: One Man's Fundamentals for Delicious Living

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Publisher's Summary

Parks and Recreation actor Nick Offerman shares his humorous fulminations on life, manliness, meat, and much more in his first book.

Growing a perfect moustache, grilling red meat, wooing a woman - who better to deliver this tutelage than the always charming, always manly Nick Offerman, best known as Parks and Recreation's Ron Swanson? Combining his trademark comic voice and very real expertise in woodworking - he runs his own woodshop - Paddle Your Own Canoe features tales from Offerman's childhood in small-town Minooka, Illinois - "I grew up literally in the middle of a cornfield" - to his theater days in Chicago, beginnings as a carpenter/actor and the hilarious and magnificent seduction of his now-wife Megan Mullally. It also offers hard-bitten battle strategies in the arenas of manliness, love, style, religion, woodworking, and outdoor recreation, among many other savory entrees.

A mix of amusing anecdotes, opinionated lessons and rants, sprinkled with offbeat gaiety, Paddle Your Own Canoe will not only tickle readers pink but may also rouse them to put down their smart phones, study a few sycamore leaves, and maybe even handcraft (and paddle) their own canoes.

©2013 Nick Offerman (P)2013 Penguin

What Members Say

Average Customer Rating

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Performance
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  •  
    Justin NEW PORT RICHEY, FLORIDA, United States 10-23-13
    Justin NEW PORT RICHEY, FLORIDA, United States 10-23-13 Member Since 2016
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    "Ron Swanson"
    If you could sum up Paddle Your Own Canoe in three words, what would they be?

    Funny nonstop listen


    What did you like best about this story?

    It was narrated by nick offerman


    Have you listened to any of Nick Offerman’s other performances before? How does this one compare?

    Just as entertaining as his well written character.


    Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?

    I laughed and felt his passion for life.


    Any additional comments?

    Please narrate more books nick. Genius.

    7 of 11 people found this review helpful
  •  
    ChrisC 01-02-14
    ChrisC 01-02-14
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    "Don't listen while operating heavy machinery"
    Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?

    Yes, any friend with a sense of humor. I've never seen Parks and Recreation before, but this was the funniest [audio]book I've consumed in years. Even my grandmother would probably spit her drink out laughing.


    What was one of the most memorable moments of Paddle Your Own Canoe?

    Nick discussing his high school sweetheart, who happened to be an evangelical Christian.


    What about Nick Offerman’s performance did you like?

    He's telling jokes designed for a deadpan delivery, so it's he'll do a better job of delivering them then you could with your own internal voice if you had read the actual book.


    Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?

    Not necessary.


    2 of 3 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Bradley Chattanooga, TN, United States 10-14-13
    Bradley Chattanooga, TN, United States 10-14-13 Listener Since 2008
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Nick Offerman isn't Ron Swanson"
    Would you listen to Paddle Your Own Canoe again? Why?

    Yes. It's an enjoyable listen.


    What did you like best about this story?

    The 'fake proposal' story


    Any additional comments?

    Don't expect this to be a bio of Ron Swanson

    2 of 3 people found this review helpful
  •  
    chris 06-20-15
    chris 06-20-15
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    "Dissapointing"
    What disappointed you about Paddle Your Own Canoe?

    I was really hoping for this to be comedic/inspirational but instead it was a pretty boring walk through of his life. Most of it was him talking about how great his family is, with no comedic value. Also, he rails Christians for being narrow minded and hurtful to society because of their judgments. His whole point was believe what you want but don't push it on others. All the while, he is insulting and making fun of sacred Christian practices. I'm not a crazy Christian but I was pretty offended. The hypocrisy was very disappointing. If you don't want me to push my beliefs on others why are you shoving your atheism down my throat and insulting my chosen belief system? Poor show.


    Would you ever listen to anything by Nick Offerman again?

    no


    25 of 43 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Bo T. Eriksen Oslo, Norway 04-06-15
    Bo T. Eriksen Oslo, Norway 04-06-15 Member Since 2014
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    "Fun and inspiring!"

    A fun and wellwriten book on how to enjoy life more inspiring than most self help books. Let's eat them steaks and head fore the woodshop y'all!!

    3 of 5 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Jorge Ecuador 02-24-15
    Jorge Ecuador 02-24-15
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    "Nick Offerman comes off as pedantic"
    Would you try another book from Nick Offerman and/or Nick Offerman?

    Niet, I thought this would be fun, much like Tina Fey's, but this is, I guess, for hardcore Offerman fans. This is the first audiobook I didn't finish because I didn't sympathize with the author.


    3 of 5 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Sean Houston, Texas, United States 02-05-15
    Sean Houston, Texas, United States 02-05-15 Member Since 2009
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    "He keeps referring to it as a humorous book"

    I'm a fan of Parks & Rec. Loved Amy Poehler's book "Yes, Please". Am generally a fan of the Ron Swanson caricature Offerman has played.

    But in the first hour, this book is nothing but is Offerman lecturing the listener about organic foods (he's in favor of them), the joy of meat, and religion (keep your fictional stories to yourself) in a fairly condescending why-isn't-this-obvious-to-you manner.

    All of which would be forgivable if the book were funny. It's not. Not so far, anyway, and my patience is running out.

    3 of 5 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Paul 08-07-15
    Paul 08-07-15
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    "Not for Ron Swanson fans"
    What disappointed you about Paddle Your Own Canoe?

    Nick spends the first 8 chapters on a diatribe against God and Christians. It's really too bad because he's lumping all Christians in with the Westboro Baptist fundamentalist types and it's not accurate or fair. Most Christians I know are humble honest folks who are just trying to be better people and live lives of devotion to God. Hardly the types to deserve this rant. Nick then goes on to recount numerous adolescent antics he and his college buddies did while suffering from various degrees of inebriation. This is paddling your own canoe? Sounds like running with the pack, Nick.


    What could Nick Offerman have done to make this a more enjoyable book for you?

    He could have spent more time with his encouraging young people to give more consideration to hands-on occupations. He can serve as a really good example here.


    4 of 8 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Juli glendale, CA, United States 06-15-15
    Juli glendale, CA, United States 06-15-15 Member Since 2015
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    "Two hours unto it and I had to stop "

    I want my credit back. Which is sad to say because I really like Nick Offerman as Ron Swanson in p and r but this book was waaay too preachy. Oi! After a while the shock value looses it's shock and in my opinion is regarded as just a tad arrogant. :( I'll still watch him in parks and rec but I just can't finish the book.

    5 of 8 people found this review helpful
  •  
    W Perry Hall 12-17-13
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Ron Swanson, Just Another Hollywood Smarta.."

    I thought "Paddle Your Own Canoe" would be funny. The book may have been funny had Nick Offerman omitted his pompous lecture in which he laughs that the faith/beliefs of the religious of the world are purely founded on fairy tales.

    The primary point of all this hilarity is his understandable detestation of self-serving politicians and charlatans who quote the Bible as if it were law, who attempt to force upon the public their religious beliefs as a part of political platforms and positions and who otherwise profit in the name of their higher power.

    I agree with what appears to me to the chief *point* of his mini-lecture; these religion-profiteers, panderers and politicos also sicken me. I don't need an actor/comic to point out the obvious by laying a sermon on me (ironically) mocking religious faith as nothing but bullshit based on fairy tales, chuckling that the Christian religion (mine) is composed of legions of mindless sycophants to a sort of comic-book superhero Son of God (Swanson's label).

    Why would Megan Mullally's husband need to ruin his big-shot book by taking potshots (near the book's beginning) at an almost certain majority of his target audience (white males, age 25-54)?

    Apparently it's true: no matter where you come from (be it Oklahoma City or Minooka, IL), initiation into the Tinseltown fraternity/sorority of "acting" intellectuals includes learning to loathe religion and God-fearing people and to ridicule them and their institutions by brandishing biased generalizations in service to a "high-minded" bigotry, Hollywood-style.

    6 of 11 people found this review helpful
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  • Holly Robertson
    4/9/16
    Overall
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    "Awesome for ladies and gents alike."

    I'm a big fan of Nick from parks and recreation, as a woman I wasn't sure if this book was going to be for me though. I was wrong. It's great, yes he talks about manliness, but it's much more than that. Well written and actually genuinely thought provoking. I'm off to craft my own canoe.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  • Nick Sherratt
    2/3/16
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    "Ace!"

    "You've never heard anyone scream like a one year old pig screaming for its balls." Offerman
    need I say more?

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  • Ian W.
    9/17/15
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    "Nick Offerman. Top notch."

    Worth a listen, a truly fantastic story. Exquisitely read by an exceptional artist. Nick Offerman, top notch.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  • M. B. Walker
    UK
    7/21/15
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Great Storyteller"
    What did you like most about Paddle Your Own Canoe?

    Offerman's approach to the book as a whole, lighthearted with real knowledge and passion about what he's talking about.


    Who was your favorite character and why?

    Mr Offerman himself of course, particularly as a child.


    Any additional comments?

    A fun, interesting listen for fans and newcomers alike.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  • david
    7/20/15
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    "A fantastic listen"
    What made the experience of listening to Paddle Your Own Canoe the most enjoyable?

    Nick has a great voice, soothing and intriguing.


    What did you like best about this story?

    The story about his wife's breasts


    Have you listened to any of Nick Offerman’s other performances? How does this one compare?

    No yet


    If you made a film of this book, what would be the tag line be?

    The lucky bastard


    Any additional comments?

    Very similar to his stand up show, which is great. But Nick needs to branch out for my money.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  • Hand Springs
    7/18/15
    Overall
    Performance
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    "Offerman takes the boring idea of a memoir and turns it into something delicious"

    This is a great read about a fascinating life. Offerman's perspective on life is delightfully uplifting and as a creative person who has fallen off the horse somewhat, Offerman's words have encouraged me to get back on.

    Offerman's performance is fantastic and takes full advantage of the medium, it very much feels like he is telling you a story rather than just reading it aloud. Something I would expect from a professional actor.

    I would recommend to anyone who enjoys comedy, aspiring creative types, or anyone who enjoys working with their hands and getting dirty. Delicious.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  • Rory Buckley
    6/11/15
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    "Excellent delivery of a solid book"

    The best audiobiography I've listened to as yet - really enjoyed it. Highly recommended to any budding Swansons

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  • Physics Geek
    Scotland
    5/31/15
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Great stuff"

    Great stuff. Sound advice. Many laughs. Wonderfully read by the author. I may seek out his other work.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  • Angelique
    4/22/15
    Overall
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    "Pure Briliance"
    What did you like best about this story?

    Nick Offerman narrating is just the greatest. He really brings his book to life and gives it an added dimension. Already a fan of his after watching him in Parks and Rec, my husband and I just loved the whole thing.


    Did you have an emotional reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?

    Oh we laughed out loud a lot!


    Any additional comments?

    Everyone needs this book in their life, Nick Offerman is an amazing person and it was so wonderful to hear him talk about his life and his experiences. He has some interesting views on religion, food..all sorts. It's excellent from start to finish!

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  • Milkslice
    London, UK
    4/3/15
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Great stuff from a humble man"

    Enjoyed it thoroughly. Even if you aren't w parks and rec fan I'd still recommend it as it's an interesting tale of Nick's life

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful

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