And Then You're Dead

What Really Happens If You Get Swallowed by a Whale, Are Shot from a Cannon, or Go Barreling over Niagara

By: Cody Cassidy, Paul Doherty

Narrated by: Dennis Boutsikaris

Length: 4 hrs and 59 mins

Publisher's summary

A gleefully gruesome look at the actual science behind the most outlandish, cartoonish, and impossible deaths you can imagine.

What would happen if you took a swim outside a deep-sea submarine wearing only a swimsuit? How long could you last if you stood on the surface of the sun? How far could you actually get in digging a hole to China? Paul Doherty, senior staff scientist at San Francisco's famed Exploratorium Museum, and writer Cody Cassidy explore the real science behind these and other fantastical scenarios, offering insights into physics, astronomy, anatomy, and more along the way.

Is slipping on a banana peel really as hazardous to your health as the cartoons imply? Answer: yes. Banana peels ooze a gel that turns out to be extremely slippery. Your foot and body weight provide the pressure. The gel provides the humor (and resulting head trauma).

Can you die by shaking someone's hand? Answer: yes. That's because, due to atomic repulsion, you've never actually touched another person's hand. If you could, the results would be as disastrous as a medium-sized hydrogen bomb.

If you were Cookie Monster, just how many cookies could you actually eat in one sitting? Answer: Most stomachs can hold up to 60 cookies, or around four liters. If you eat or drink more than that, you're approaching the point at which the cookies would break through the lesser curvature of your stomach, and then you'd better call an ambulance to Sesame Street.

©2017 Cody Cassidy (P)2017 Penguin Audio

Critic reviews

“As someone who is averse to flying, elevators, and a catalog of other things I’d rather not admit to, I found this book strangely cathartic. A great read, full of interesting anecdotes and funny commentary.” (Ali Almossawi, author of Bad Choices and An Illustrated Book of Bad Arguments)

“Arch, brainy...[with] vivid, engaging, and utterly fascinating scientific explanations. This merrily macabre compendium playfully offers lessons in basic human physiology, nuclear fusion, quantum physics, and fluid dynamics, among other things, and at every turn, the authors explain the concepts cogently and with gleeful enthusiasm.... With bite-size morsels of astonishing science and the perfect combination of smart-alecky writing and black humor, this page-turner will surely debunk any misapprehension that science is dull.” (Booklist)

“Entertaining - if harrowing.” (The New York Times Book Review)

Grossly informative and entertaining

If you have an abundance of morbid curiosity, you'll find this fascinating. It discusses a variety of hypothetical situations and what science tells us would happen - sometimes from the experiences of other people, usually more from theoretical expectations. This book will tell you just how worried you should be about massively thick hordes of mosquitoes, or about getting in the way of the Large Hadron Collider, or about all the terrible things that will happen to you if the airplane window breaks at a high altitude. It actually deals with a dizzying array of interesting science to explain this.

Hilarious attention to detail

Even as an adult, I often wondered what would happen if you could actually dig a hole straight through Earth and dive in. I assumed you would find yourself stuck floating at the center of the earth for the rest of your very warm life. But now I know... it's so much more complicated than that.
Even as an adult, I never wondered what would happen if a bee stung me on the testicle. I would assume that it would be one of the most painful places you could get stung. But now I know... it's not that bad apparently.

I also really appreciate that this book is separated into chapters with the hypothetical as the title. it makes it easy to skip to a question you want to experience again or share with a friend.

Could have been twice as long

While its a book of science, no one will mistake it for Sir Issac Newton's Principia Mathematica.
Its a entertaining collection of worst case what-ifs. Got thru it in one sitting.. now that's a vote of approval.
The narrator supplies just the right number of pregnant pauses and an overall tone of being highly impressed.
That said, for the price it should of been at least six hours in length.

Great book full of fascinating facts & laughs!

I absolutely LOVED this book! I chose it because I needed something new to listen to during my commute. It seemed fairly interesting but I honestly wasn't expecting much. Boy, was I wrong! This book is chock full of fascinating facts and information. My mind was blown at least once during each chapter. Each chapter postulates a wildly odd/unlikely scenario and then proceeds to break down what we could expect to happen using scientific facts and data. While it's a very scientific book overall, it's sprinkled with loads of sarcasm which is right up my alley. I certainly didn't expect so many LOL moments. I highly recommend this book if you're looking to learn random, fascinating facts and get a good laugh while you do it. It was a PHENOMENAL ride and I'm so sad it's over.

Hilariously Morbid

Great deadpan delivery by narrator that made the gruesome details seem entertaining and educational. I would love to know where they got the idea for some of these oddly specific chapters, like The Pringles Factory.

Fun and educational

I was surprised to have actually learned some interesting science tidbits through this fun book.

Very good

This book kept my interest the whole way through, if you enjoy the "What If" books or "How to" you'll probably enjoy this one.

Fun...

Interesting and fun, but the authors spent a lot of time talking about what happens to you in different outer space scenarios. I would have liked some more real-life actual scenarios, but, overall, it was fun, light listening.

I want more!!!

This book is hilarious and morbid, probably the best combination of qualities for a story to possess. SEQUEL PLEASE!!!

Totally fun!

The info is illuminating and at times unbelievable, delivered in a fun way through the wry humor of the narrator.