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The Werewolf's Guide to Life Audiobook

The Werewolf's Guide to Life: A Manual for the Newly Bitten

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Publisher's Summary

Have you been attacked by a wolf-like creature in the last 30 days? Was it after the sun had set and under a full moon? If you answered, "yes" to both these questions, there's a very good chance that you were bitten by a werewolf. You now have less than a month before the full moon returns and with it your first transformation into a savage, bloodthirsty beast.

Survival is an option, but first, know this:

  • Werewolves are real.
  • The majority of lycanthropes who do not have access to this book die during or shortly after their first transformations, generally due to heart failure, gunshot wounds, exposure, drowning, or suicide.
  • Hollywood horror movies are NOT to be used as guides to living as a werewolf. Their goal is not to educate, but to entertain. As a result, they are largely ignorant of the realities of the condition.
  • Ignorance creates monsters; lycanthropy does not.
  • You are not a monster.

    The Werewolf's Guide to Life cuts through the fiction and guides you through your first transformation and beyond, offering indispensable advice on how to tell if you're really a werewolf, post-attack etiquette, breaking the news to your spouse, avoiding government abduction, and how to not just survive, but thrive. You cannot afford to not read this book. Your very life depends on it.

    ©2009 Ritch Duncan; (P)2009 Random House

  • What Members Say

    Average Customer Rating

    4.1 (101 )
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    4.0 (73 )
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    4.3 (74 )
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     (11)
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    Performance
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    •  
      Michelle SALT LAKE CITY, UTAH, United States 12-13-11
      Michelle SALT LAKE CITY, UTAH, United States 12-13-11 Member Since 2010
      HELPFUL VOTES
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      "A totally new look at the werewolf."

      This book totally rises above the hollywood werewolf portrayal. Werewolves are not evil killers, but human beings who have a complicated condition to deal with. This is a well-researched, logical, humorous look at the werewolf living and working in today's world. If you are a werewolf, this book will empower you. If you are not, you will learn to empathize with werewolves as never before. This is a must-have for any werewolf fan. Robertson dean does an absolutely awesome job with the narrative too.

      4 of 4 people found this review helpful
    •  
      Antonio Marchena-Roldan 01-30-10 Member Since 2012
      HELPFUL VOTES
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      "Entertaining..."

      If you like werewolves and you have some sense of humor you will like this audiobook. It respects the myth (unlike they have done with vampires so many times...) and gives you a new and modern perspective of what a werewolf should do in these days. I really enjoyed it and it will be one of the audiobooks that i will listen more than one time.

      4 of 4 people found this review helpful
    •  
      Stein Norfolk, VA, United States 10-02-12
      Stein Norfolk, VA, United States 10-02-12 Member Since 2012
      HELPFUL VOTES
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      "Fun and Educational - Made me want to get bitten!"

      This was one of the stranger choices I have made on Audible, and I am really glad I took the risk. Pretty much what it says - an owner's manual for your new werewolf body. The narrator is perfect - he has a dry, clinical style that remains interesting and easy to listen too. He could just as easily be talking about how to refinish your dining room table, yet manages to convey a sense of authenticity that reinforces the excellent writing. Too bad most 'real' manuals are not as thorough or well-done as this one. I laughed out loud more than once, and thoroughly enjoyed The Werewolf's Guide to Life from 'cover' to 'cover'.

      2 of 2 people found this review helpful
    •  
      Bridget 05-27-11
      Bridget 05-27-11
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      "FANTASTIC book!!"

      I am a HUGE werewolf fan, and this book was PERFECT for any werewolf fan! Fantastic pace, fantastic information, cleverly written, mythology clearly researched and just all around interesting! I have recommended this book to friends and I just loved loved loved it!

      2 of 2 people found this review helpful
    •  
      Robo 10-02-10
      Robo 10-02-10
      HELPFUL VOTES
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      "Great book"

      Very funny book; who knew what those poor werewolf's had to go through each full moon.

      2 of 2 people found this review helpful
    •  
      Brando 05-13-10
      Brando 05-13-10 Listener Since 2009
      HELPFUL VOTES
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      "The Werewolf's Guide to Life (Unabridged)"

      This book was great! I really liked how this book brought you inside the mind of a Lycanthrope. For those out there that really appreciate when a writter sticks to the core mythology. This is your book.

      1 of 1 people found this review helpful
    •  
      Amazon Customer Dallas, Gabon 11-17-17
      Amazon Customer Dallas, Gabon 11-17-17 Member Since 2014
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      "interesting"

      I expected this book to have me laughing hysterically because of the ridiculousness of the notion but instead it was delivered as purposeful lesson with a little bit of dry humor. I actually liked it. Seeing as I am a deeply immersed Patricia Briggs fan, this book shed a little bit more light on the lives of the werewolve when it is without a pack which this book recommends. It's undoubtedly challenging and makes me appreciate my humanity. When you listen the best approach is compare it to your life and thank GOD you are who you are. Human or otherwise. We all have tough and difficult lives but everything is a trade off. When you compare problems, your problems will always be preferable.

      0 of 0 people found this review helpful
    •  
      fishman 04-24-17
      fishman 04-24-17 Member Since 2017
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      "fun irreverent title. it's"

      fun werewolf lore. the kind of thing I like for when I am at work

      0 of 0 people found this review helpful
    •  
      Caitlyn McKay 11-10-16
      HELPFUL VOTES
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      "Hilariously Serious"

      I really enjoyed this book! It's written and presented in a sincere and serious way, which only served to make the whole thing quite hilarious. It generally addresses the typical "beastly Hollywood werewolf". Whether or not the info is quite right, it's still an interesting and fun read. I'm sure any werewolf lover will enjoy this book!

      1 of 1 people found this review helpful
    •  
      FS Troxler Decaturville, TN, United States 09-19-16
      FS Troxler Decaturville, TN, United States 09-19-16 Member Since 2016
      ratings
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      9
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      Story
      "For America, after all they think they are the only ones in the world."

      Everything is written for the American. There are more werewolves in the rest of the world than in the percentage of the 300+ million Americans. The rest of the world uses metric measurements. All of the measurements of food is in pounds instead of kilos. All of the safe room measurements are in feet and inches. It is like most American books I've ever read. Americans think they are the only people in the world even though they are only a rather small percentage when you look at Lycans works wide. Unless you are American get ready to do a lot of conversions and figuring. I'm looking forward to a more worldly version for those bitten outside of the US.

      0 of 1 people found this review helpful
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    • GV
      2/9/17
      Overall
      Performance
      Story
      "The only useful self-help book I have ever seen"

      Since a werewolf doesn't have a master with a rolled up newspaper to swat it on the nose, the werewolf must train itself....
      All in all, a very useful book. I can't off-hand think of anything they missed. The book takes itself very seriously and is delivered in a deadpan voice.
      There is not much excitement in the book. Still, the chapters about fur chasers and covert government experiments might give me nightmares one of these nights. It might take me a while to forget about eating skunks too.

      I strongly recommend passing on the book to anybody you suspect of having been bitten by a werewolf. It is a must have for a fledgling werewolf hunter or a deluded fur chaser.

      0 of 0 people found this review helpful
    • xeno
      5/29/15
      Overall
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      Story
      "Howling good"

      very good and great fun to listen too. even learned a few things. well worth it.

      0 of 0 people found this review helpful

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