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Publisher's Summary

According to The Waiter, 80 percent of customers are nice people just looking for something to eat. The remaining 20 percent, however, are socially maladjusted psychopaths.

Waiter Rant offers the server's unique point of view, replete with tales of customer stupidity, arrogant misbehavior, and unseen bits of human grace transpiring in the most unlikely places.

Through outrageous stories, The Waiter reveals the secrets to getting good service, proper tipping etiquette, and how to keep him from spitting in your food. The Waiter also shares his ongoing struggle, at age 38, to figure out if he can finally leave the first job at which he's really thrived.

(P)2008 Brilliance Audio, Inc.

Critic Reviews

"The other shoe finally drops. The front-of-the-house version of Kitchen Confidential; a painfully funny, excruciatingly true-life account of the waiter's life. As useful as it is entertaining." (Anthony Bourdain)
"I really enjoyed Waiter Rant. The book is engaging and funny, a story told from my polar opposite perspective." (John DeLucie, chef of The Waverly Inn)

What members say

Average Customer Ratings

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  • Brett
  • Charlotte, NC, United States
  • 04-18-13

Long on the Lectures - we get it already!

How could the performance have been better?

I think that if the author read this book himself he would have put in more energy into the performance. This reader sounds like he is reading the back of a penut bag at the end of a long red-eye flight to Newark.

Any additional comments?

I listened to this book as a result of listening to "Heads in Beds". I enjoyed that book so much that I wanted to see what else, like this book, was out there. While both are about the lives of men in the service industry they couldn't be more different. I wanted to like this book more but it didn't work for me on a number of different levels.

First there was the tone. This author is a bit of a know it all and spends a lot of time lecturing and explaining everything from waiting tables to the meaning of life. He even explains his own cliché analogies. Exaggeration? Perhaps, but this book is the result of a blog - 'nuff said.

Second was the plot. I know that there may be no plot in these types of stories but for me a good memoire has some character arc that shows the character moving from one point to another. Heads in Beds does this well. The character starts naïve and good and eventually is corrupted by the hotel industry until ultimately it climaxes in a way that leads to change and rebirth. This story is woven behind the vignettes and is subtle and clever. This book just reads like the author’s personal journal. There is no real arc because the author already starts perfect (see my first point).

Third was the lack of entertainment and educational value. If there is no plot then I want at least some of this. I didn’t learn ANYTHING new about the restaurant industry - hard to believe about a so called rant. People have sex in the bathroom and illegal aliens work in the kitchen. Wow. I probably could have figured that out without having to work in the restaurant biz.

OK so I have been pretty tough of this guy. Is this book really that bad? No. It is entertaining enough to listen to as you mow your lawn or wash the dishes or snake the drain or whatever other task would be hell without some droning on about something in your head. I put this on the level of reality TV. This is “reality fiction” and just like its counterpart on TV it is not worth much but can be entertaining if you're only half engaged.

(Now watch this guy go out and become the next genre fiction mega author celeb)

2 of 3 people found this review helpful

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GOOD INSIDER INFO

I liked it, but am disappointed because I thought it would be funny and it wasn???t ??? sure it was entertaining, but no LOL moments for me. I think if you???ve worked in the restaurant business, you???d appreciate it much more because it???s full of ???insider??? ???nod-your-head-in-agreement??? information. I???d recommend it to anyone in ???the bizz???.

2 of 3 people found this review helpful

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Be a cocky server vicariously and have fun

As many others mentioned, the author seems to have a big ego and his cocky tone can be grating at times. But that character trait and his quck-temper are the very elements that lead to inevitable friction which makes for intriguing stories. If he were a modest, always even-tempered waiter, this book would've been as bland as a weak cup of coffee. He's not and thanks to that, this read / listen is quite a scrumptious concoction. Nothing insipid or stale about it for sure.

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Good story, great insight to a servers life.

Funny, honestly written. Can relate to this server on so many levels. Really tells it like it is.

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Enjoyable true story.

Every battle weary server will see themselves here. And people who have never worked in restaurants will learn a lot.

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could not put it down

Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?

yes...especially people in the customer service and food industry

Who was your favorite character and why?

i think his name is steve the lead character.....loved how he handled the customers, and managing the restaurant

Have you listened to any of Dan John Miller’s other performances before? How does this one compare?

yes i really like him and all the different voices he does....really bring the characters and books to life....

If you were to make a film of this book, what would the tag line be?

The Restaurant, The Good, The Bad, The Ugly....

Any additional comments?

i literally could not put this book down it was such a great insight on how a restaurant really works make sure to stick it out till the end to get the 50 things every waiter and customer needs to do that was great...the narrator did a great job

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Want to B a waiter?

I liked the honesty in this ebook. I love restaurants and always try to be polite and give a good tip. Once someone has worked for tips they will always be generous to others.
This book interested me because I have friends in the food industry. It is Avery demanding and time consuming career. Pay is not so great so better be a calling or desperation.
I enjoyed this narration and story.

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Things we don't notice

This narration is a guide and a description of everyday restaurant life. For both sides: employees and customers.

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great perspective on restaurant business

I greatly enjoyed the book and perspective we don't usually hear from the restaurant business. Gives me a little more appreciation for service industry. Plus, it was a great comic at times through the book.

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  • tav.
  • Napa, CA United States
  • 01-04-15

Very informative

A MUST read for anyone who dines out.
I love these stories, and respect my servers more having read this.
The recording is over modulated, but not unlistenable.