The Bitchy Waiter

Tales, Tips & Trials from a Life in Food Service

By: Darron Cardosa

Narrated by: Darron Cardosa

Length: 5 hrs and 29 mins

Publisher's summary

Millions of people have, at some point in their lives, waited tables. Some did it only in college or got out by sheer determination, good luck...or suicide. Others took it on as permanent employment. And many remain haunted by nightmare scenarios where they are the sole servers in restaurants packed with complaining patrons.

For all those disenchanted current and former food service employees, Darron Cardosa has your back. His career began at a Texas steakhouse in 1984, and since 2008 he's vented his frustrations on the popular blog The Bitchy Waiter.

A snarky mix of David Sedaris, Anthony Bourdain, Erma Bombeck, and Mo Rocca, Cardosa distills 30 years of food service into dark, funny tales - about crazy customers, out-of-control egos, and what really goes on in that fancy restaurant - that anyone who worked in the industry will recognize and relate to.

©2016 Darron Cardosa (P)2016 Audible, Inc.

Hilarious

Cardosa said he started working in a restaurant while in high school. After college he continued in the industry while trying to make a career as a writer. He says he has worked in all types of restaurants, from neighborhood cafes, fast food to upscale celebrity chef spots and has worked all over the country.

The book has some funny stories about lousy tippers, obnoxious diners to misbehaved children. He also includes some dos and don’ts for diners which I thought were helpful. I could not believe that people would expect the waiter to run to a store to purchase something the restaurant did not provide on its menu or was out of that day. It is hard to believe the rudeness of people and in some ways the casual disregard is worse.

Cardosa said over two million people wait tables in this country. Cardosa says “Everyone should wait tables for three months. They’d understand what it’s like to have a job that’s considered subservient. People who’ve never been in that position don’t understand how easy it is to make someone feel degraded.”

I worked as a waitress while I was in high school; it is not a job I would care to do again. I did learn how tough the business world could be. The job greatly improved my memory as we were not allowed to write the orders down; we had to memorize them. Just think if you had six tables of four people each and everyone ordered something different. I have found that skill helpful over the years.

The book is well written and a delight to read. Cardosa did a good job narrating the book.

Best Book Ever!!

Such a funny book! On top of the comedic stories, there are several heartwarming moments. This is the first book I have ever read that has made me literally laugh out loud. This is a must-read for anyone involved in the food service industry and an eye opener for anyone who isn't.

A MUST READ!!!

It's like he is me, incarnate! The first paragraph will have you laughing out loud and understanding the meaning of life...

Laugh Out Loud Funny

I eat in a restaurant once or twice a week. Sometimes when I am waiting for my meal to arrive I watch the servers doing their work. Even in a moderately priced chain restaurant, it takes skill to do the job well. One reason I read this book was to to get more insight into what it's like to do this job.

Darren Cardosa finds humor in customer behavior that made me cringe. It is easy to understand why he is sometimes "bitchy." His narration is superb.

I found this book to be entertaining, informative and very funny. A perfect "summer read."

Well...he IS bitchy.

And also very funny. Insult-comic funny. Spit-take funny. Loved it.

If you want to laugh out loud and learn a little something about what your server is thinking when, for instance, you present a clean plate and jokingly say the food was just terrible, get this book. (Just in case you imagine (as I did) that you're the only person who thought of that little joke, you're not.)

Worth the credit for the fun.

Enjoy!

I am a retired server. I enjoyed this book. It is so true! (Except that part about the fork in the trash, I always pulled them out🤫)

Horrible!

The title of this book should be nothing but bitching because that is what he does the entire book. Maybe because I am a business owner and I work very hard to keep my patients happy and taken care of but I could not handle this book. There is nothing worse than a person who just complains and talks trash about their customers or their place of work!

Bitchy, Whiney and Tiresome

What could have made this a 4 or 5-star listening experience for you?

These stories would be entertaining if told over several strong drinks with a group of coworkers at the end of a hard shift waiting tables. However, they lose much of their charm when listened to driving along the interstate.

What was most disappointing about Darron Cardosa’s story?

I can almost hear the author complaining about this review, "Well, what did you f*ckin expect--it's called "THE BITCHY WAITER"! Yes, but if you go to a restaurant and order a dish described as "tart" you expect it to at least be balanced and palatable. While some of his snarky bitchiness is clever and entertaining, his tart wit quickly deteriorates into cloyingly bitter, mean spirited whining.

What didn’t you like about Darron Cardosa’s performance?

While the the whiny narration fits the subject well, it quickly becomes grating and tiresome.

If you could play editor, what scene or scenes would you have cut from The Bitchy Waiter?

Well, I got as far as four chapters and gave up there. So, based on my experience, I would say the first four chapters...

Any additional comments?

I worked in restaurants for years when I was younger, and I know some of the fascinating characters you meet there, as well as the annoying customers. This book would have been more enjoyable if he focused more on the fascinating characters and less on the annoying customers.

Nailed It

This guy nails everything that every server has to go through on a day to day adventure when they apron up. He makes life so relatable and it's great to know I'm not alone and that everyone in the industry deals with it no matter the state or the clientele.

THANK GOD FOR BITCHY! I Love him💖👍😂

This book hits it on the spot! I haven't laughed so much. However, more importantly my server career now has cushioned, ease and the best support to not allow the truth of these Fup zoo of customers we deal with. I have since changed my outlook at the despair things of people and look forward to being at work much more understood. I notched up my wit, my charm, people smart and a now a content victor. Thank you God Bless you Bitchy. The children stories are the best!🤣👍

A Server's Best Friend

Loved it. The author/narrator paints a really vivid picture with his words. Every server can truly relate to these stories. ❤️