Showing results by publisher "Greg Proops" in All Categories

Comedian Greg Proops is smarter than you.

Hello, pesky liberals! Festive swearing and baroque insults abound as the White House hands out Medals of Freedom to everyone performing violent rear-end assault on the Constitution. Also, we find out that the secular Jews who run Hollywood love anal sex, not Jesus biopics, and that Jessica Simpson's dad is hyper-aware of his daughter's cup size. Then, conservatives lay it out straight: you either love children, or you love abortion. What's it gonna be?

Hey there wild mustangs! Sure, Michael Jackson impersonators have new-found employment re-enacting courtroom scenes on TV and Southern California hasn�t been this rained-upon in 100 years, but fear not the apocalypse! Proops tells us why we will all live to die another day. Also, we are treated to an unreleased transcript of Koko the Famous Talking Pervert Ape�s sexually-harassing exchange with a research assistant.

Hey party prawns! This week Proops has got nuthin' but time to lambaste everyone from Rick Santorum to his beloved President G.W. Bush, who ended his recent vacation early to sign a mysterious law inspired by one mysterious person. Also, Congress dares to take on the ultra-divisive "steroids are bad" issue, Halliburton fibs again, and a pet-store owner sees the face and shoulders of Satan on the shell of a turtle named Lucky.

Hello, Nippers. Your pal Proops is filing from very, very, very (very, very, very) far away in this dispatch: the other side of the world, in fact. He's in New Zealand selling out shows at the annual Comedy Festival. Ever the intrepid comedian, Proops has the latest on Shrek, the hermit ram who was on the lamb for six years and whose ultimate capture, televised championship shearing, and subsequent visit with the Prime Minister have captivated the world.

Hey there groove chickens. All politicians are scary charlatans, but in a speech at the White House Correspondents Dinner, First Lady Laura Bush revealed that George W. Bush is just an ordinary guy! According to Laura's speech, W apparently doesn't like books, restraint, or subtlety, and once tried to milk a male horse! Plus, Proops explains why that whole Newsweek Koran thing was such a big deal, and gives a nod to teenage mule-lovers from Georgia.

Hello's and most grave salutations, brothers and sisters. Proops gives a solemn first-hand account of being in London on July 7th, the day of the subway bombings. He also reminds us that similar tragedies happen in Iraq, Afghanistan, the Sudan, and other places around the world every single day. Plus, Proops takes on the Live 8 concert, the treasonously leaky Karl Rove, the violently heterosexual Tom Cruise, and more.

Proops People! Greg Proops is back, and he's still dropping the bomb on everything that's on. It's his bi-weekly satirical supplement that makes you question your own judgment. Greg just got back from "old Europe" where he was shamelessly exposed to naked women's breasts but somehow has managed to stay sane. On the counter terrorism tip, he wonders why you can load up on guns, bombs, and fresh fruit on private planes. And much, much more

Hello post-pope people! In this episode, Proops explains why no-one wants to hear the loser's version of history, and why English isn't the language of diplomacy. Also, serial wife Britney Spears gets her own reality show, Anne Coulter is on the cover of Time magazine, and the Monaco Royals are screwing and dying at a news-worthy rate. Plus, the Pentagon continues to teach us that 'full disclosure' is not just a phrase; it's an empty and meaningless phrase.

Greetings, tiny mooses! In this episode, Proops takes a trip to that non-fascist American counterpart to the north, Canadia. Proops also explains the populist appeal of talking about sports, as well as how Howard Dean, the man whom Dick Cheney said no one ever liked, managed to win the governorship of Vermont five terms in a row. Plus: misuse of funds in Iraq? Never! Profiteering during wartime? Of course not!

Bonjour Proops Petit Chous. Our Man Proops is in Montreal this week and he's catching onto why the rest of Canada is more than happy to let the Quebecois succeed. He says the sophisticated Frenchy attitude of Quebec makes for none of the scenery of France, but all of the attitude. Then, traveling down the St. Lawrence Seaway of Satirical Bile, Proops goes over the checklist why John Edwards is NOT Dick Cheney and why the Republicans are shaking in their duck blinds.

Hello people of the green but gassy orb! There is so much more for Proops to hate in this edition, as Bush cavorts with terrorist-training Saudi princes, indulges in unintentional irony, completely ignores the press at his press conference, and all while Exxon makes 4 million dollars per hour during their biggest quarter ever. How was your year?

Hello, tiny ungrateful well-sauced biscuits. Greg Proops is live (on tape) speaking to you this week from San Francisco, aka Baghdad-by-the-Bay. Just off the high of appearing right after New Yorker reporter Seymour Hersh at an ACLU benefit, Greg Proops is ready to launch a humor rebellion where we laugh until We win.

It's week three, and, no, the election is still not over...but thankfully Robert Downey, Jr. is up to his old tricks, providing a nice diversion. Hear Greg's full take on Gore, Bush, and Dick...

Hello interplanetary hedgehogs. It's been a tough week for freedom and Proops greets you from his hometown of San Francisco, where he's still trying to figure out how two little words in a children's nursery rhyme caused so much ire. Proops sends kisses to SCOTUS, also to the ten men who rule the world, the lucky man who dates both Martha Stewart and her daughter, and to George Bush's much discussed nether regions.

Hello Audible Rebels and welcome to AudibleProops, your one-stop satirical shop. Dick Cheney recently announced that the Democrats are the ones behind the high oil prices. Huh? This makes Proops wonder who on earth still believe anything that the President or VP Goebbles actually say. And with Tom "Orange Alert" Ridge going around saying he has the best job in the world, Proops wants to take a minute to really think that one over.

Howdy muskrats! How much nonsense will it take before people start burning things to the ground? Is there an imminent threat that isn't government sponsored? What is terror, and what is Katie Holmes doing with Tom Cruise? Proops has all the answers.

Hello, Creatures of the Night! Proops has returned from interminable prairies of Foxskatchewan to the everyday reality show known as life in Los Angeles. He's slathering on (and on) about the bare-all lives of Paris Hilton, Nicole Richie, the Olsen twins, and the only slightly more down-to-earth commuters stuck at all hours on L.A. freeways. Proops also has some new thoughts on Dick Cheney and the culture war raging between the red states and the blue states.

Proops launches another missile as part of his self-described "Operation Poorly Written Material." He feels Dionne Warwick's pain, gives the press conference that Mike Piazza dreams of giving, points out that people who don't do a good job - especially, say, those who work for the FBI and CIA - might actually be fired for their incompetence instead of rewarded, throws Fred Durst a bone to his troll-like sub-bridge dwelling, and more.

What's Greg's patriotic message for this week? From Scalia, the inevitable partisan bickering to come, beer can hats, it's almost too much for one to take. Have a listen.