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Assholes Finish First Audiobook

Assholes Finish First

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Publisher's Summary

What do you do after you write a number-one best-selling book about your drunken, sexual misadventures that makes you rich and famous? Celebrate by getting more drunk and having insane amounts of sex, obviously. And pretty soon you've got another f-ing book on your hands. Stuffed full of ridiculous stories of bad decisions, debauchery, and sexual recklessness, Assholes Finish First starts where I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell left off, then proceeds to "some next-level shit." You already know how women react to confidence, game, and vodka, but what happens when you add money and fame to the mix? You get answers to the hard questions you've never thought of asking: What's it like to have sex with a midget? What about two midgets? How does it feel to get multiple requests to "fuck for charity"? What does it do to a man to watch a 19-year-old do wind sprints to sober up, so that she can have sex with you before her twin sister does? At what number of virgins does deflowering them stop being fun and start feeling like a job? When a girl you met three hours ago decides to tattoo your name next to her pussy, what is the appropriate reaction? Can you X-ray a blowjob? The answers are inside, they are absurd and hilarious, and they are the product of one man's experiences: His name is Tucker Max, and he is still an asshole.

©2010 Tucker Max (P)2010 Simon and Schuster Audio

What Members Say

Average Customer Rating

4.3 (711 )
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Performance
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  •  
    Nate Dumonseau 10-02-10 Member Since 2017
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Tucker learned to read."

    Upon re-reading "I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell," I have decided this is as funny, if not more so. That combined with the fact Tucker as infinitely improved his narrating skills makes this book a must read.

    2 of 2 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Michael Chester, MD, United States 01-05-12
    Michael Chester, MD, United States 01-05-12 Member Since 2015
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    "Tucker is an a-hole from start to finish"
    Would you try another book from Tucker Max and/or Tucker Max?

    Maybe if there was more to the book than just having sex with multiple women and drinking stories.


    Would you recommend Assholes Finish First to your friends? Why or why not?

    If they were looking for a break from audiobooks that had some redeeming qualities and just want an escape to the ultimate hedonistic lifestyle. If you need some clever derogatory comments, this is your book.


    Did the narration match the pace of the story?

    Yes - Tucker does a good job of telling his story.


    Was Assholes Finish First worth the listening time?

    Yes, but if it were any longer, I would not have finished it. There are definitely some funny parts.


    3 of 4 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Teri Hollister, CA, United States 04-29-11
    Teri Hollister, CA, United States 04-29-11
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    "Awesome book"

    This is a book that is spoken from the first person by an articulate individual that does what he wants and is driven by 2 things beer and women. Some of the stories are crude but hilarious. If you are a type of person that can not laugh at things that are not PC then don't read this book.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Tyrell 10-14-10
    Tyrell 10-14-10
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    "Duped"

    I love the first book, but this one is not funny at all. The first book is awesome. However, like the title says for this book, he comes across as a complete a-hole.
    I think these stories are the ones that were on the cutting floor for his first book.

    3 of 4 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Amazon Customer 09-11-17
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    "I had lol moments"

    When I first read this book (years ago), I remember crying and struggling to get through the duke camp out section because I was laughing so hard. Even roughly knowing what was happening next I still could not contain the laughter after I heard the story from Tucker's own lips.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Anonymous 09-05-17
    09-05-17 Member Since 2017
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    "loved it"

    great audio book very funny listened at work took two days to finish couldn't wait to get to work the 2nd day to finish

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    richwire 08-23-17
    richwire 08-23-17
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Has its moments of utter hilarity."

    Not quite the sustained excellence of stories found in 'Beer in Hell' but if you enjoyed that book you'll like this one too. Seemed to drag a bit at the end... I don't get the whole midget thing and I didn't think the last story in the book was all that great. Tucker's narration much better than 'Beer in Hell.'

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Amazon Customer 08-16-17 Member Since 2017
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    "Time flies when you are laughing your ads off"

    best way to pass a boring work day by listening to what u would rather be doing.....sex and alcohol

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Kindle Customer Atlanta, GA 06-23-17
    Kindle Customer Atlanta, GA 06-23-17 Member Since 2013
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "SMH...HUGE balls Tucker!!!!!"

    Oh. My. God! This book is so funny. I actually bought the paperback at the Goodwill for like 75 cents or something. I read the first chapter and waited two days to get the free audible. I laughed my butt off. This guy is such a douche. But, to be honest how many times have you actually just said and did what you felt and didn't worry about the consequences? I can honestly say that, yes, he was an asshole, but, I'm married to an asshole that's just as bad so I can honestly say that I enjoyed Tucker's asshole tendencies. I absolutly loved his sex stories, it takes HUGE balls to admit to some of what Tucker has admitted to. But, hey, like he said, there wouldn't be a book without them. He says what he thinks, does what he wants, consequencies be damned. I loved it.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    eclass New york 06-17-17
    eclass New york 06-17-17 Member Since 2011
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    "This book sucks"

    Honestly this book sucks on all levels. If you like this book you simply aren't intelligent. Tucker is a moron and it's sad there are women who actually slept with him. Don't waste your time on this crap. Honestly worst book I ever heard

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful

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