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Has Anyone Seen My Pants?
- Narrated by: Sarah Colonna
- Length: 6 hrs and 21 mins
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Publisher's Summary
How does a gal with a successful career, great friends, and a razor-sharp wit find herself wandering pantsless through the hallways of a casino hotel in Iowa on New Year's Eve? Ask Sarah Colonna.
Has Anyone Seen My Pants? is a laugh-out-loud trip around America (and Mexico!) with Sarah as she braves crying in nail salons, mother-daughter road trips, Iowan casinos, and single-shaming resorts. From a fling gone wrong to friend breakups and a new romance, Sarah's signature wit and sharp observations take you on a journey at once so deviously funny and surprisingly compassionate that it might just steal your heart - not to mention your pants.
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Average Customer RatingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- lisa martinez
- 04-28-15
clearance shelf material
I've only known Sarah Colonna from her being on the comedic panel of Chelsea lately, I enjoyed her then so I thought, "why not?" I had just read Jenny McCarthy's book, "love, lust, and the art of faking it," so I was in the mood for another funny woman's humorous take on reality. This was in my, "recommended," section. so after reading the reviews I was for sure it would make me, "laugh out loud." Sadly, I think I laughed maybe once. not to be harsh, but it wasn't funny. maybe slightly humorous. about half way through I thought about turning it off and never visiting it again, but I had paid for it, and like a bad movie I had the rational, "I've come this far, might as well finish it..." Sarah is a sweet woman, and seems to have fun adventures and surrounds herself with good people, but my recommendation is to wait till this goes on clearance. sorry Sarah.
4 people found this helpful
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Overall
- Lindsey Cohen
- 06-15-15
Kinda funny- not super exciting
Nothing big happens, but I listened to the whole thing, I like her so I wanted it to be really funny.
2 people found this helpful
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- Michelle
- 05-20-15
Sarah Colonna Owes Me One Audible Book Credit!!
As far as I'm concerned, Sarah Colonna owes me 1 Audible Book Credit. I want my credit back, I want time back, I wish I could un-hear all of it, and I wish I could completely remove this book from my Audible Library Cloud!! All I can do is tag this book as "read" in Audible but it will niw FOREVER hang out there in my Audible Cloud. I hate that!
Here's the thing about a book.....the writer needs to have a subject matter. This book is completely pointless. Sarah, who told you this was a good idea for a book?? All this book consists of is dating stories. BORING!! it's a year in the life of someone dating. The language is crude at times, Sarah is whiney a lot of the time and behaves badly socially all the time. Stop drinking, maybe then you could find your pants and you could stop writing pointless, boring, whiney, complaining books.
1 person found this helpful
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- brandon
- 04-05-15
Loved it! Insightful and hilarious!!
I thought the book was hilarious and gave us a really good insight into the life of Sarah!!! A must read!!
1 person found this helpful
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- MissMaizie
- 01-12-23
LOVE!!!
Hilarious Stories! Sarah is charming and very relatable. Definitely a must listen! I’ve now listened twice!
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- Lisa
- 07-08-20
Great book!
Loved this so much! I am single with cats. This book gives me hope for the future. Thanks so much Sarah! ❤️❤️
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- Sangeeta Patel
- 07-29-18
listen to her work first
I had no idea who she was prior to listening. She does a lot of explaining in a way that makes you wonder what she might think of her audience's ability to understand basic communication.
Once I went to see her live I was able to appreciate this book a bit more. I wish I had done that first. it took about 4 times of starting to get past the first hour or so. It took some time to feel more engaged to follow through with the rest.
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- LTS-love to shop
- 05-24-18
Enjoyable must read/listen for all single women
I really enjoyed the book. Sarah you are a good story teller. I did not find gut busting funny. I did find myself smiling a lot while listening and regretting the book came to an end. I had know idea twitter could be used for dating. thanks for the education. If you are still doing stand up I will try to attend one of your shows.
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- Amazon Customer
- 12-25-17
Meh
It was ok. The performance was what put me off. You’d think if part of your profession was talking and you were telling your own story, that it would be smooth and energetic. It kind of seemed at times as if the words she was reading were a complete shock to her. I’m a little on the fence about people doing impersonations of people’s broken English too...
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- LLL
- 12-01-17
Missing Pants
I Loved this book! I can't wait to read Sarah's first book!
And I'd love to see her act, preferably in person here in Burlington Vermont (a better Burlington), or on TV, if I must!
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Story
Jen Kirkman wants to be the voice in your head that says, "Hey, you're okay. Even if you sometimes think you aren't! And especially if other people try to tell you you're not." In I Know What I'm Doing - and Other Lies I Tell Myself, Jen offers up all the gory details of a life permanently in progress. She reassures you that it's okay to not have life completely figured out, even when you reach middle age (and find your first gray pubic hair!).
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3.25 Stars: If You Have Friends, Or A Sister--
- By Gillian on 04-29-16
By: Jen Kirkman
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I Didn't Come Here to Make Friends
- Confessions of a Reality Show Villain
- By: Courtney Robertson, Deborah Baer
- Narrated by: Courtney Robertson
- Length: 7 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Complete with stories, tips, tricks, and advice from your favorite Bachelor alumni, and filled with all the juicy details Courtney fans and foes alike want to know, I Didn't Come Here to Make Friends is a must-listen for every member of Bachelor nation.
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I didn't come here to make friends
- By Carolyn on 06-10-15
By: Courtney Robertson, and others
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The Andy Cohen Diaries
- A Deep Look at a Shallow Year
- By: Andy Cohen
- Narrated by: Andy Cohen
- Length: 13 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In this dishy, detailed diary of one year in his life, Andy goes out on the town, drops names, hosts a ton of shows, becomes codependent with Real Housewives, makes trouble, calls his mom, drops some more names, and, while searching for love, finds it with a dog. We learn everything from which celebrity peed in her WWHL dressing room to which Housewives are causing trouble and how. Nothing is off limits - including dating.
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I wanted to like this... But I just can't
- By cyndi on 12-10-15
By: Andy Cohen
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Unwifeable
- By: Mandy Stadtmiller
- Narrated by: Mandy Stadtmiller
- Length: 9 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Mandy Stadtmiller came to Manhattan in 2005, newly divorced, 30 years old, with a job at the New York Post, ready to conquer the city and the industry in one fell swoop. Like a "real-life Carrie Bradshaw" (so called by Jenny McCarthy), she proceeded to chronicle her fearless attempts for nearly a decade in the Post, New York magazine, and xoJane. But underneath the glitz and glamour of her new life, there is a darker side threatening to surface. She goes through countless failed high-profile hookups in the New York comedy and writing scene.
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I'm from Western Nebraska
- By Jared Roffers on 05-07-18
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Single State of Mind
- By: Andi Dorfman
- Narrated by: Andi Dorfman
- Length: 8 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Andi Dorfman, breakout star of ABC's The Bachelorette and New York Times best-selling author of It's Not Okay, returns with this new collection of her adventures as a still-single gal surviving and thriving in New York City.
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Shallow
- By c63989 on 01-10-18
By: Andi Dorfman
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The Girl with the Lower Back Tattoo
- By: Amy Schumer
- Narrated by: Amy Schumer
- Length: 8 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In The Girl with the Lower Back Tattoo, Amy mines her past for stories about her teenage years, her family, relationships, and sex and shares the experiences that have shaped who she is - a woman with the courage to bare her soul to stand up for what she believes in, all while making us laugh. Down to earth and relatable, frank and unapologetic, Amy Schumer is one of us: She relies on her sister for advice, still hangs out with her high school pals, and continues to navigate the ever-changing boundaries in love, work, and life.
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mind numbing
- By katrina on 09-17-16
By: Amy Schumer
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The Awesome Girl's Guide to Dating Extraordinary Men
- By: Ernessa Carter
- Narrated by: Janina Edwards
- Length: 12 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Four women. Two years.A friendship to last a lifetime.The only things that Sharita, Thursday, Risa, and Tammy have in common are their disastrous love lives. But the year three of them turn 30 will be different, they swear!Sharita, a plump and conservative accountant wants to make partner at her firm and find the man of her dreams. Thursday, the daughter of a formerly chart-topping political rapper, wants to stop being a serial one-month stander, and settle down into a stable life with a stable boyfriend.
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She did it again!
- By Danee C Jones-Mitchell on 01-10-14
By: Ernessa Carter
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The Engagement Game
- Why I Said "I Don't" to Marriage and "I Do" to Me
- By: Joi-Marie McKenzie
- Narrated by: Joi-Marie McKenzie
- Length: 7 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Ambitious, confident, and successful, Joi-Marie believes she has it all figured out. At 28 years old, she has an enviable job as a producer, covering entertainment in New York City. Her close-knit family is loving and encouraging, and her boyfriend, Adam, is as close to perfect as you can get - except for the fact that he won't propose.
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Not just for single women!
- By Amazon Customer on 06-20-17
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The Southern Education of a Jersey Girl
- Adventures in Life and Love in the Heart of Dixie
- By: Jaime Primak Sullivan
- Narrated by: Jaime Primak Sullivan
- Length: 6 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Jaime Primak Sullivan, a Jersey-bred, tough-as-nails PR maven - and unlikely transplant in an upscale suburb of Birmingham, Alabama - has spent her entire life crossing the line: whether she's pushing the boundaries of what proper Southern ladies consider to be "polite behavior" or literally traversing the Mason-Dixon line in the name of love. She isn't afraid to say what everyone is thinking when it comes to love, sex, friendship, and many other topics that are all too often sugar-coated in polite Southern company.
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Awesome book
- By Gwendolyn on 09-23-16
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Dirty Thirty
- By: Asa Akira
- Narrated by: Veronica Worthington
- Length: 5 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
As she contemplates turning 30 years old while still being in the adult film trade, Asa Akira, author of the best-seller Insatiable, delves into her past, present, and future, exploring the events that brought her to where she is now and the surprising and insightful plans she has for her future. Internationally known as a porn star, Akira's perceptive, funny, and straightforward writings on love, sex, death, marriage, and celebrity come together in a surprising book of essays.
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this was fun I'm going to buy her other book 2
- By Sir Lawrence on 01-09-19
By: Asa Akira
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You'll Never Blue Ball in This Town Again
- One Woman's Painfully Funny Quest to Give It Up
- By: Heather McDonald
- Narrated by: Heather McDonald
- Length: 3 hrs and 30 mins
- Abridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
You’ll Never Blue Ball in This Town Again is the laugh-out-loud story of an attractive Los Angeles woman who found herself in the predicament of being an unwilling virgin. Whether in a backseat, a community pool, or a sports stadium, with a frat boy, a doctor, or an A-list celebrity, Heather McDonald knew how to turn those boys blue, which provided her with hilarious stories and adventures in her search for true love - and, ultimately, her very own happy ending.
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Hooray for me and screw You!!!
- By Buck on 11-01-16
By: Heather McDonald
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A Total Waste of Makeup
- Charlize Edwards, Book 1
- By: Kim Gruenenfelder
- Narrated by: Allyson Ryan
- Length: 9 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Charlize "Charlie" Edwards certainly knows, in theory, what it takes to lead a successful and happy life. But she's also turning 30, chronically single, and faced with serving as maid of honor at her younger sister's wedding. Charlie finds herself struggling to juggle the chaos of wedding planning (while wondering if she'll ever wear the white dress herself), her all-consuming job for lunatic boss Stanton, and a serious crush on Jordan, a photographer on the set of Drew's latest feature - a man who might actually return her feelings.
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Great read all the way through
- By Raven on 11-18-13