Insecure in Love

How Anxious Attachment Can Make You Feel Jealous, Needy, and Worried and What You Can Do About It

By: Leslie Becker-Phelps PhD

Narrated by: Susan Boyce

Length: 6 hrs and 19 mins

Publisher's Summary

Has your romantic partner called you clingy, insecure, desperate, or jealous? No one wants to admit that they possess these qualities, but if you find yourself constantly on the alert, anxious, or worried when it comes to your significant other, you may suffer from anxious attachment, a fear of abandonment that is often rooted in early childhood experiences.

In Insecure in Love, you'll learn how to overcome attachment anxiety using compassionate self-awareness, a technique that can help you recognize your negative thoughts or unhealthy behavior patterns and respond to them in a nurturing way - rather than beating yourself up. You'll also learn how insecurity can negatively affect healthy dialogue between you and your partner (or potential partners) and develop the skills needed to stop you from reverting back to old patterns of neediness and possessiveness.

©2014 Leslie Becker-Phelps (P)2015 Tantor

Critic Reviews

"A godsend for those who unknowingly bring a lot of angst into a relationship." ( Library Journal)

Narrator, Please Take a Drink—I Beg You

As far as the book goes, it’s amazing, and I highly recommend it to anyone—especially those suffering from an anxious attachment style. However, as far as the actual audiobook goes, I couldn’t wait for it to be over. It was so painful to listen to the narrator’s dry mouth. I cringed every time she swallowed or opened her mouth to read. It was extremely distracting. I had to force myself to listen to the whole thing.

Excellent book

This book really helped me understand why I reacted certain ways in past relationships AND it has great exercises to help move toward a more secure way of thinking. If you've ever asked yourself, "Why did I do that?", or if you've ever felt you didn't deserve to be loved this is a must read.

I don’t normally leave reviews

This book was absolutely incredible, so many powerful insights to help mainly people struggling with insecurity in love relationships. I can’t recommend it enough

Great book!

Very therapeutic researched advice that helped me a lot in dealing with an avoidant female. Couldn't recommend this book enough for anyone.

Excellent read

I really enjoyed the book and was surprised at how much it knew about my anxiously attached behaviors. If you want to read something that will give you tools to get out of the anxious cycle you are and and have a healthy lasting relationship, buy this book.

great read

Definitely helpful for learning how to manage my own emotions and feelings. definitely recommend to others who want to have more self control and want to feel like they are empowered.

A must read for understanding attachment styles

This book discusses both anxious and avoidant style, and of course secure. The exercises allows you to dig in to any wound you may be struggling with and see it from a different perspective. You may cry while listening, or after doing an exercise, but more importantly you will feel yourself giving yourself a huge hug. This book is quite lovely! Very understanding on how it discusses attachment styles in a none judgmental way.
Worth the investment!

This offers hope

If you have difficulty with relationships or pervasive patterns of problems in relationships, listen to the book. Twice preferably.

Ok material

This book was ok and gave some very general advice on how to work on ibut I became even less impressed when I read Love Sense by Susan Johnson (pioneer of emotionally focused therapy, echo I would give 5 stars). For someone who is looking for literature about attachment Theory and healing unhealthy attachment patterns there are better books. Insecure in love is not bad, just not worth your time in light of the other resources out there.

Excellent Book

So much great and useful information in this book. The exercises are very helpful in healing your heart and creating more secure attachments.

Extremely basic.

Pick a partner you have things in common with and communicate is the message of this book. Not enough about why you might have an insecure attachment style in the first place or how to tackle that.
The narrator sounds like computer generated sepeech.
If you have done any kind of work on yourself or relationships this will be no help.

Great audibal.

I would have to say I really enjoyed this audibal gives great insight into love and insecurities, when you start listening, it is difficult to stop.

Brilliant

Learning about attachment styles and how it affects your life has been transformative. This book is well written accessible and very helpful. If you want to learn tools and develop self awareness with regards to your relationship with yourself and others I highly recommend this book.

Good content, narration sounds automated

Helpful insight into attachment theory, but the seemingly auto-generated narration sounds robotic, which grates and distracts from what's being said.

Brilliant

Thoroughly enjoyed this book. Very insightful and helpful for anyone looking to understand the origin of any issues they may have within relationships.

Very helpful

Very eye opening it’s very relatable and made me realise and have hope of better relationships

Great relationship insight

It really takes two willing partners to build a secured lasting relationship. We have to be willing and accepting of ourselves and the other self.

Excellent self help book

Great practical advice for those people who feel insecure in love. Lays out theory in clear concise way and good practical exercises to develop a more secure style of relationship both towards yourself, your significant other and others in general. Highly recommended