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Publisher's Summary

Somewhere in Arizona’s Chocolate Mountains lie the Big Maria Mine and a wealth of gold lost for 100 years. There’s only one problem: Those mountains are now the home of the US Army Proving Ground, the world’s largest active artillery range. But for Harry, Ricky, and Frank, three down-at-the-heels guys with few dollars but plenty of dreams, the gold offers each of them a chance for a new life. Are scuba diving through an underwater ghost town; facing down a hungry mountain lion; doing the hesitation waltz across a minefield; matching wits with potheads, pit bulls, and bikers; and braving the might of Uncle Sam’s full arsenal worth it?

With little more than a samurai sword, a severed head, and an impractical amount of optimism, these intrepid soldiers of (mis)fortune are about to find out.

©2012 Johnny Shaw (P)2012 Brilliance Audio, Inc.

What members say

Average Customer Ratings

Overall

  • 4.1 out of 5.0
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  • Overall
  • Performance
  • Story

Crazy Adventure and Crude Humor - GOOD STUFF

Every now and then I find an author I've never heard of before and it's like hearing a great new song.
In this case it's Johnny Shaw. This guy has the right combination of crude humor, bad-ass plot, and a certain quirky, slightly crazy, twisted point of view.
I should say this too: IT'S NOT FOR EVERYBODY.
It's more of a guy thing.
If you're PC, or easily offended, don't buy it.
If dirty jokes turn you off, go read something on Oprah's list. This is not for prudes.
It's not the work of a genius of literature.
If you love a dirty joke and a crazy adventure this is for you.
It's funny. It's raw. It makes me laugh right out loud even when I'm not feeling very well.
It's the kind of humor I grew up with when I hung around up the schoolyard.

4 of 4 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
  • Performance
  • Story
  • Tim
  • United States
  • 09-28-12

Medium Hot

I am really surprised that no one else has rated this book yet because Johnny Shaw writes books for guys from a male's point of view. His humor really shows in his stories and his use of everyday foul language is so commonly use in his characters where it becomes laughable in his subtle jokes

After reading "Dove Season", I was really excited to read "Big Maria". It's not as good as his previous title, which you should read, but "Big Maria" will give you a good adventure, in finding the treasure of gold.

Once you read this book, you will understand the joke of being Medium Hot. I will always be a fan of Shaw because like a romance author, he writes with all of his testosterone firing.

I hope that I'm the not the only person that who writes a review on this book.

I finished it within a day.

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

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  • Story

The Hilarious Antics of the Desperate and Stupid.

This book a was a delightful surprise. It's very different than what I normally read, leaning to the more serious works of fantasy and science fiction, but I am glad I got it. Shaw has a particular sense of humor that pokes fun at people in general. I can take every character in this story and apply them to someone I know. Even though his characters are ignorant in many ways, you have to root for them because, as you shake your head at them, you realize they are reflections of you and everyone else. The dialogue is superbly written, and the narration (I got the Wysper-Sync added) is incredible. David de Vries takes a well written story and really adds to it with perfect narration. I can't say enough about what a great job Mr. de Vries did with this story.

2 of 3 people found this review helpful

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  • Performance
  • Story

Couldn't do it

The crudity in the first three minutes made me ditch this one. All the essentials of a great work: Examination of vomit chunks in a man's underwear, copious F words and bathroom artwork. Eloquent.

Whatever awaits in the remaining 9 hours of storytelling must remain a merciful mystery to me.

2 of 3 people found this review helpful

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Great Story & Performance

what a hoot, famtastic funny story. The narator was phenomenal and played all the parts great. I laughed from start to finish

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Fun

thoroughly enjoyable listen great way to pass time I would highly recommend this book to anyone

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  • TS
  • Tucson, AZ, United States
  • 07-04-17

I really liked it

The summary doesn't do it justice. This was a funny and heartwarming story. I wasn't sure what to expect from it and what I got I enjoyed. It was silly and fun. I recommend.

  • Overall

Epic Adventure

This is one of the funniest, most touching books I have ever had the pleasure to read. Highly recommend. Characters seemed actually alive, warts and all. Narration was great, I don't know how he got through it without laughing. I cannot wait to read another one of Shaw's books!

  • Overall

Great book

fun book, one that will take you for a wild crazy ride you don't want to end.

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I liked the story until ...

I was enjoying the story until the group got "higher than they'd ever been" from eating raw marijuana... dumb and irritating mistake... cannabis has to be decarboxylated to be psychoactive...