Polywise

A Deeper Dive into Navigating Open Relationships

By: Jessica Fern, David Cooley - contributor, Carrie Jenkins PhD - foreword

Narrated by: Jessica Fern, David Cooley

Length: 11 hrs and 26 mins

Publisher's summary

As polyamory continues to make its way into the mainstream, more and more people are exploring consensual nonmonogamy in the hope of experiencing more love, connection, sex, freedom and support. While for many, the move expands personal horizons, for others, the transition can be challenging, leaving them blindsided and overwhelmed. Beyond the initial transition to nonmonogamy, many struggle with the root issues beneath the symptoms of broken agreements, communication challenges, increased fighting and persistent jealousy. Polyamorous psychotherapist Jessica Fern and restorative justice facilitator David Cooley share the insights they have gained through thousands of hours working with clients in consensually nonmonogamous relationships. Using a grounded theory approach, they explore the underlying challenges that nonmonogamous individuals and partners can experience after their first steps, offering practical strategies for transforming them into opportunities for new levels of clarity and intimacy. Polywise provides both the conceptual framework to better understand the shift from monogamy to nonmonogamy and the tools to navigate the next steps.

PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.

©2023 Jessica Fern (P)2023 Thornapple Press

Critic reviews

"A must-read for anyone navigating open relationships."—Esther Perel, psychotherapist and author of Mating in Captivity.

"I find Jessica's work not only highly useful but absolutely essential to building healthy, secure open relationships. What a gift this intelligent, inspired piece of literature is to the broader non-monogamous community, as well as those about to embark on this brave frontier of multiple loves! I whole-heartedly recommend this book to anyone interested in self-acceptance and self-mastery, as well as their own emotional well-being as they build loving, sustainable, healthy multiple relationships."—Kitty Chambliss, ACC, CPC, ELI-MP, relationship coach and author of Jealousy Survival Guide: How to Feel Safe, Happy and Secure in an Open Relationship

"I often say there's being polyamorous and then there's being polyamorous well. I believe Polywise can equip you to do just that."—Evita Sawyers, author of A Polyamory Devotional.

Great for whatever stage of Polyamory you're in

I have read Jessica's book, Polysecure, and absolutely adored it, so when I saw Polywise recommended I had to grab it. This book is chock-full of amazing information for those new to polyamory or even those who have been at it for a time. The section going over codependency was especially eye opening and is something I want to actively work on.

While I'm currently not practicing polyamory due to a really bad start at it, I'm confident should I try again in the future, armed with the knowledge from these books, I'll fair much better.

The book is a gift, performance is not

This is the worst performance on an audio book I have ever heard. It sounds like she is struggling through each sentence as if she is reading it for the first time in a foreign language. She pauses and emphasizes in unnatural places that distract from the content of the book. I am going to continue reading on my own. David Copley’s performance is good, in contrast.

An engaging deeper dive

Another gift from Jessica Fern (with the awesome addition of David Cooley’s voice). Recommended for anyone who wants to dive deeper into the work of crafting more connected, loving and intentional relationships. Loved it!

A Gift to the CNM Community

In Polywise Jessica Fern and David Cooley integrate their skillful professional, as well as personal and vulnerable, insights for engaging the paradigm shift of Consensual Non-Monogamy (CNM).

As a queer CNM person myself, I highly recommend this book to all CNM curious and experienced folks alike, because as Emily Sotelo Matlack of the Multiamory Podcast put it, “…this is polyamory 401.” As a therapist (ASW, and Internal Family Systems Level 1 therapist-in-training) I also highly recommend it to all therapists, whether or not you specialize in working with the CNM population, as it explores nuances that are necessary for affirmatively working with this population, rather than pathologizing and counseling them based on monogamous paradigms and cultural norms.

Thank you Jessica and David for this gift to not only the CNM community, but to efforts to consciously and ethically engage in relationships as we heal our parts, and awaken our authentic Selves.

Nix Kippel (She/They), MSW, ASW

To be chewed up and digested

I like how this book gives support for those of us involved in CNM. Very well read and informative. Worth giving a second listen!

Awesome tools included

Absolutely loved the stories and the tools that were present in this book. Such a great read whether your poly or not

Wow

Soooo sooo helpful in understanding navigating this world. It’s really given my heart perspective and allowed me to come back to my heart center with compassion.

One of the best relationship books I’ve read

This book has something to offer everyone, regardless of what relationship structure you are drawn to.

Transformative

This is so….transformative? Or at least lays the groundwork for transformation. Helping me see all the endless ways I can grow and change and learn. It’s exciting and overwhelming. It’s about so much more than just relationships. It’s more about one’s personal journey with themselves and how they relate to the world, culture, and indoctrination etc

Very thorough

I read polysecure first and so the beginning was a bit for me to get through. The end was a great mix of self reflection that I appreciate dove tails very much with my inner work in IFS and attachment.

Thank you Jessica Fern and David Cooley