How to Be an Adult in Relationships

The Five Keys to Mindful Loving

By: David Richo

Narrated by: David Richo

Length: 9 hrs and 20 mins

Publisher's summary

"Most people think of love as a feeling," says David Richo, "but love is not so much a feeling as a way of being present." In this audiobook, Richo offers a fresh perspective on love and relationships - one that focuses not on finding an ideal mate, but on becoming a more loving and realistic person. Drawing on the Buddhist concept of mindfulness, How to Be an Adult in Relationships explores five hallmarks of mindful loving and how they play a key role in our relationships throughout life:

1. Attention to the present moment; observing, listening, and noticing all the feelings at play in our relationships
2. Acceptance of ourselves and others just as we are
3. Appreciation of all our gifts, our limits, our longings, and our poignant human predicament
4. Affection shown through holding and touching in respectful ways
5. Allowing life and love to be just as they are, with all their ecstasy and ache, without trying to take control

When deeply understood and applied, these five simple concepts - what Richo calls the five A's - form the basis of mature love. They help us to move away from judgment, fear, and blame to a position of openness, compassion, and realism about life and relationships. By giving and receiving these five A's, relationships become deeper and more meaningful, and they become a ground for personal transformation.

©2018 David Richo (P)2018 Random House Audio

Many nuggets of wisdom

You may be thinking you don’t need this. Maybe not, but you’ll be better off if you give it a listen. Great perspectives, understanding and guidance throughout.

Better than therapy

Read this and follow the wisdom within it. It is better than therapy. And will save your future and present relationships. 😊

Every chapter was a WOW

The book focuses on five key principles that can help individuals develop more fulfilling and mindful relationships with others. These five principles are:

1. Attention: Paying attention to our own needs and desires, as well as those of our partner, can help create a more meaningful connection.

2. Acceptance: Accepting our partner as they are, rather than trying to change them, can help foster greater intimacy and trust.

3. Appreciation: Expressing gratitude and appreciation for our partner can help strengthen the relationship and create positive feelings.

4. Affection: Expressing physical affection, such as hugging or holding hands, can help build intimacy and closeness.

5. Allowing: Giving our partner the freedom to be themselves and pursue their own interests can help build trust and respect.

Engaging, Insightful, Real

Always love David Richo's talks! Very insightful, while using humor, makes his style easy to grasp and engaging.

don't love the title , love the book!

I was almost discouraged by the title but am so glad I got this and listened to it, great book!

It was an eye opening

This book improved my awareness of treating my partner with love and dignity and I might go back knin read it again

If I gifted a single book to everyone

This book gives such insightful and meaningful ways to frame how to think about relationships. And honestly if there was only one book or piece of advice I could give a friend about relationships it would be this one.

美晟德勒陈子曰：

Have you considered aligning the five aggregates with the five-As?

Just as form dictates what is named, acceptance conditions what can be named.
Just as feelings dictate what is effected, affection conditions what can be effective.
Just as perception dictates what is true, attention conditions what can be true.
Just as formations dictate what is real, appreciation conditions what can be real.

Finally, just as consciousness dictates what is experienced, allowance conditions what can be experienced. In effectively naming real truths with the power to create experience as such, we aim to always thusly emanate the cause of causes. We aim to love.

Virtue and blessings!

A great book

The book is great and very helpful especially if you’re going to tend to the practices. The reader is a bit slow so I had the speed on 1.15 the whole time which was perfect for me.

Reviewing like an adult.

I enjoyed, I understood and I learned…everything I was looking for and many things I needed to know.