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Boundary Boss
- The Essential Guide to Talk True, Be Seen, and (Finally) Live Free
- Narrated by: Terri Cole MSW LCSW
- Length: 7 hrs and 54 mins
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Publisher's summary
Break free from over-functioning, over-delivering, people-pleasing, and ignoring your own needs, so you can finally live the life you deserve!
Most of us were never taught how to effectively express our preferences, desires, or deal-breakers. Instead, we hide our feelings behind passive-aggressive behavior, deny our own truths, or push our emotions down until we get depressed or so frustrated that we explode, potentially destroying hard-won trust and relationships.
The most successful and satisfied people on the planet have one thing in common: the ability to create and communicate clear, healthy boundaries. This ability is, hands down, the biggest game changer when it comes to creating a healthy, happy, self-determined life.
In Boundary Boss, psychotherapist Terri Cole reveals a specific set of skills that can help you stop abandoning yourself for the sake of others (without guilt or drama) and get empowered to consciously take control of every aspect of your emotional, spiritual, physical, personal, and professional life.
Since becoming a boundary boss is a process, Cole also offers actionable strategies, scripts, and techniques that can be used in the moment, whenever you need them. You will learn:
- How to recognize when your boundaries have been violated and what to do next
- How your unique “Boundary Blueprint” is unconsciously driving your boundary behaviors, and strategies to redesign it
- Powerful boundary scripts so in the moment you will know what to say
- How to manage “Boundary Destroyers” - including emotional manipulators, narcissists, and other toxic personalities
- Where you fall on the spectrum of codependency and how to create healthy, balanced relationships
This book is for women who are exhausted from over-giving, overdoing, and even over-feeling. If you’re getting it all done but at the expense of yourself, give yourself the gift of Boundary Boss.
Critic reviews
“This powerful book is a clear path to deep healing work. If you’re ready for true emotional freedom, let Boundary Boss show you the way. And thank you, Terri Cole! Your brilliant (and often hilarious!) guidance is a blessing to us all.” (Kris Carr, New York Times best-selling author)
“Terri Cole’s advice is game-changing! After having her on my Off the Gram podcast, I went home and broke up with a toxic friend, then wrote about it in my own book! Terri is the ultimate boundary boss and communication queen and in this powerful book, she shows us how to become the same. The world needs this book right now!” (Meaghan B Murphy, content chief for Woman’s Day magazine, author of Your Fully Charged Life)
“With Boundary Boss, Terri Cole, powerhouse healer and transformational therapist, serves up the psychologically savvy medicine that you need to step out of destructive habits, stop people-pleasing, and set your soul free.” (Gabrielle Bernstein, number-one New York Times best-selling author of The Universe Has Your Back)
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Elizabeth Earnshaw is here to help. The renowned Gottman therapist, founder of A Better Life Therapy, and influential Instagram therapist behind @lizlistens has helped to transform countless relationships. With I Want This to Work, she presents for today’s generation the most effective and proven steps for relationship success.
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I want this to work too. Excellent information, excruciating execution
- By Sunny Bettley on 03-17-23
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Perfectly Hidden Depression
- How to Break Free from the Perfectionism That Masks Your Depression
- By: Margaret Robinson Rutherford PhD
- Narrated by: Eleanor Caudill
- Length: 5 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
If you were raised to believe that painful emotions are a sign of weakness, or if being vulnerable has always made you feel unsafe, then you may have survived by creating a perfect-looking life - a life where you appear to be successful, engaged, and always there for others. The problem? You're filled with self-criticism and shame, and you can't allow yourself to express fear, anger, loss, or grief. You recognize something is wrong, but you're not sure what exactly - only that you feel trapped and alone. If this sounds like you, you may have perfectly hidden depression (PHD).
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Amazing
- By Kimberly Davis on 10-27-20
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Trust Again
- By: Debi Silber PhD
- Narrated by: Debi Silber PhD
- Length: 7 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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During times of betrayal, when we most need support, sometimes the ones we would turn to first are the betrayers. Other times, we’re saddled with shame and fear. But it’s during these times that we need to learn to trust again. This book offers support, comfort, and community to those struggling with feelings associated with betrayal and guides them to healing from painful experiences of it. Listeners will learn about and move through five stages from betrayal to breakthrough and will be lovingly guided with tools and strategies along the way.
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Life changing
- By KM on 07-27-22
By: Debi Silber PhD
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Make Peace with Your Mind
- How Mindfulness and Compassion Can Free You from Your Inner Critic
- By: Mark Coleman
- Narrated by: Mark Coleman
- Length: 6 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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The inner critic is the voice inside our heads reminding us that we are never "good enough". It's behind the insidious thoughts that can make us second-guess our every action and doubt our own value. The inner critic might feel overpowering, but it can be managed effectively. Meditation teacher and therapist Mark Coleman helps listeners understand and free themselves from the inner critic using the tools of mindfulness and compassion.
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Life changing!
- By Lisa Ackerman on 12-28-20
By: Mark Coleman
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The Emotional Edge
- Discover Your Inner Age, Ignite Your Hidden Strengths, and Reroute Misdirected Fear to Live Your Fullest
- By: Crystal Andrus Morissette
- Narrated by: Andi Arndt
- Length: 9 hrs and 24 mins
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The Emotional Edge is an exciting expansion of Crystal's successful brand - she has tackled weight management, confidence building, and spiritual growth; now she combines all that and more into her most powerful program yet. The Emotional Edge is a guide for letting go of the past and embracing a more empowered future. This audiobook is spiritual self-help designed to teach listeners how to overcome behavioral ruts and engage the world from a happier, more empowered place.
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the world needs more of this.
- By Amber Jessop on 11-25-17
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The Science of Stuck
- Breaking Through Inertia to Find Your Path Forward
- By: Britt Frank LSCSW
- Narrated by: Sasha Heinz, Britt Frank LSCSW
- Length: 7 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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We all experience stuckness in our lives. We feel stuck in our relationships, career paths, body struggles, addiction issues, and more. Many of us know what we need to do to move forward—but find ourselves unable to take the leap to make it happen. And then we blame and shame ourselves, and stay in a loop of self-doubt that goes nowhere. The good news is you’re not lazy, crazy, or unmotivated. In this empowering and action-oriented guide, you’ll discover why we can’t think our way forward—and how to break through what’s holding us back.
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Mental health is a physical process
- By Meagen G. on 04-18-22
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The Courage Habit
- How to Accept Your Fears, Release the Past, and Live Your Courageous Life
- By: Kate Swoboda, Bari Tessler MA
- Narrated by: Kate Marcin
- Length: 5 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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In The Courage Habit, certified life coach Kate Swoboda offers freedom from the outdated belief that one must be fearless in order to live courageously. Instead, she defines courage as a willingness to act on what we want in spite of our fears and offers an evidence-based program to help readers conquer their inner critic, overcome worries, increase resilience, work toward their highest aspirations, and make courage a habit every day.
By: Kate Swoboda, and others
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Men's Work
- A Practical Guide to Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, and Find Freedom
- By: Connor Beaton
- Narrated by: Connor Beaton
- Length: 9 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In Men’s Work, ManTalks founder Connor Beaton offers the tactical, self-led guide men have been looking for. Here, he destigmatizes inner work by reframing it as a kind of psychological warrior training that many men can relate to and have been craving. Beaton walks you through a framework for facing the hidden and rejected aspects of yourself—factors that lead to self-sabotage, anxiety, and depression.
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From a woman’s perspective
- By NBB on 03-21-23
By: Connor Beaton
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The Good Karma Divorce
- Avoid Litigation, Turn Negative Emotions into Positive Actions, and Get On with the Rest of Your Life
- By: Judge Michele F. Lowrance
- Narrated by: Judge Michele F. Lowrance
- Length: 4 hrs and 20 mins
- Abridged
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Overall
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Story
The average divorce takes two years with a median cost of $30,000. Yet the true cost of divorce is more than time or money; it is the legacy of the decisions made during the process. No matter how long two people have been married, whether there are children or not, divorce often leads to bad choices that can forever alter a family's life. But what if you could reverse the stereotype and move regret-free through this process?
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Thanks for the great advice!
- By Tom Clemente on 11-09-16
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The Path to Positivity
- Proven Positive Thinking Techniques for Getting Motivated and Living Your Best Life
- By: Caitlin Margaret
- Narrated by: Linda Henning
- Length: 4 hrs
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Overall
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Whether you’re hoping to feel confident at work, create stronger relationships, or complete unfinished home projects - lasting change starts with positive thinking. The Path to Positivity gives you the mental tools to overcome negativity, renew your motivation, and get unstuck from the daily grind - all with the help of positive thinking. Find empowerment through positive thinking with supportive advice on things like goal setting, relationship management, and self-care.
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Excellent book!
- By جحش بن سلمان on 05-14-21
By: Caitlin Margaret
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Let Go of the Guilt
- Stop Beating Yourself Up and Take Back Your Joy
- By: Valorie Burton
- Narrated by: Valorie Burton
- Length: 5 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Even women who feel fulfilled often struggle to meet the demands of modern life. Both working and stay-at-home moms agree that the expectations of women have risen dramatically in recent decades. As a result, many women overcompensate and over-apologize while the guilt dampens the joy of motherhood, relationships, and professional accomplishments. Let Go of the Guilt helps you peel back the layers of emotional, cultural, and spiritual expectations that make it difficult to navigate your multiple roles, dreams, and daily demands on your life.
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Not meant for non-religious people
- By Anna Amuse on 09-20-21
By: Valorie Burton
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Emotional Chaos to Clarity
- How to Live More Skillfully, Make Better Decisions, and Find Purpose in Life
- By: Phillip Moffitt
- Narrated by: Fred Stella
- Length: 8 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Despite our best-laid plans, life can often be difficult, disappointing, and stressful. Consequently, when things don’t go right, we are often left in a state of emotional chaos, dealing with feelings like anger, anxiety, frustration, and doubt, which can cloud our perspective and negatively affect the way we live our lives. But in this inspiring book, Phillip Moffitt shows us that we need not be at the mercy of our emotions. By cultivating a responsive mind rather than a reactive one, we can achieve a state of emotional clarity.
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You Are Not Your Emotions
- By Sara on 10-23-14
By: Phillip Moffitt
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Be Yourself, Everyone Else Is Already Taken
- Transform Your Life With the Power of Authenticity
- By: Mike Robbins
- Narrated by: Mike Robbins
- Length: 5 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Learn the power and importance of authenticity; move beyond the fear and limitations that stop you from living truly and bring more authenticity into your work, relationships, and life.Motivational Speaker, Mike Robbins' new audiobook, Be Yourself, Everyone Else is Already Taken will teach you the principles of authenticity, and give you the exercises and actions to transform your life.
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Worth Listening to
- By Rob Strait on 08-20-12
By: Mike Robbins
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How to Validate People
- Listen and Hear Better to Form Deep Connections Fast (Master Your Communication and Social Skills)
- By: Ian Tuhovsky
- Narrated by: Randy Streu
- Length: 2 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
If you want relations that bring joy, fulfilment, and peace into your life. Then you’re looking at the right book. Most people have a hard time nurturing long-term, meaningful relationships. You’re exposed to new people daily at work, at the gym, or even at the supermarket. Despite this, less than one in ten interactions end up flourishing into a friendship.
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Very little how to. Misleading title
- By Amazon Customer on 01-10-24
By: Ian Tuhovsky
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Christians often focus so much on being loving and giving that they forget their own limits and limitations. Have you ever found yourself wondering: Can I set limits and still be a loving person? How do I answer someone who wants my time, love, energy, or money? Why do I feel guilty when I consider setting boundaries?
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Do you struggle to set boundaries with others in your life? Has your past conditioned you to expect pushback when setting boundaries, or caused you to give up on trying to set boundaries altogether? The prospect of setting boundaries can be scary and intimidating and can put you in a very vulnerable place where your mental health and wellbeing may even be at risk. There is a science to creating boundaries—one that will empower you, deepen your connection with others, and improve your self-esteem. Setting Boundaries That Stick offers a scientific, neurobiological approach to boundary work.
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Important Work!
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Setting Boundaries
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Setting boundaries can be tough—you don’t want to disappoint other people, but you also don’t want to be stuck in a situation that makes you uncomfortable or unhappy. The good news is that setting healthy boundaries is really a good thing that can make you happier and strengthen those relationships you were so worried about. So how do you get started? Setting boundaries is an important skill, and the only way to get better is by practicing. In this book, you’ll find 100 activities that will help you become better at setting boundaries.
What listeners say about Boundary Boss
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- KJorfeld
- 10-09-21
SO GOOD I bought a paperback copy too
I’ve never needed to hear something so much and this came at just the right time. I ended up buying a physical copy shortly after getting into the audio because I want to have this available to reference later. It’s SO GOOD!
The way she blends a perfect mix of lessons, stories, and examples helped me see so clearly exactly where I need boundaries, that I CAN do this, and helped me feel enough compassion for myself to WANT to do this. I started having some of the hard conversations and doing the exercises since and they WORK. It’s already positively changing my self concept and relationships, some for better and some to say goodbye. Highly recommend this book!!
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- Crystal
- 12-21-21
A must read for any woman who puts themselves last
Terri's book has literally transformed my life. Her soothing voice and straight forward talk has helped me shed the weight of overfunctioning and always putting myself last. I couldn't be happier with the purchase. I bought the hard copy as well!
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- Ben and Holly
- 08-07-21
Excellent.
Every woman - and also men - should listen to this. Very helpful, good advice, powerfully delivered with hints and tips and exercises. I learned a lot from this, and highly recommend.
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- Patience Vitacco
- 10-07-22
Game Changer!
I just finished listening to Boundary Boss and plan to do it again. If you have been living with disordered boundaries, the information here is insight and a road map to healing. I have been inspired to embrace life fully, and completely myself because I have learned that my preferences, desires and limitations matter. That living my truth is to embrace myself and the people I love. I'm so excited to get to work. Grab your journal and buckle up, this one is a game changer!
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- Gloria
- 06-06-23
Every person needs this book!
Amazing read all the way through. I appreciated the level of detail provided for the listener.
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- Amanda
- 12-29-23
Most therapeutic book I ever read!
This was so helpful to me as an overgiver! I feel like I put three years of internal work into the course of the time to read this book (one year). You must take breaks and be kind to yourself while reading because this is hard work but it will really change your life forever like she says! I highly recommend for people with disordered boundaries! I love that she empowered us and held us accountable for our shit! Thank you!
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- Gale McCullough
- 04-22-24
Excellent and insightful book beautifully arranged for powerful impact.
Insightful info to deepen connection to yourself and grow tools within to create healthy boundaries. I wish this was required reading for every human.
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- Beth Stevens
- 04-27-21
Fabulous book, life changing
Terri Cole has built on her brilliant podcast skills and produced a book which is beautifully organized and presents life changing strategies in easily-accessible ways. Even those of us who have some decent boundary skills benefit tremendously from this book. I certainly have! And those of us who haven’t thought about how problems in our lives stem from lacking boundary-setting skills need it now! Because of this book, I am well in my way to being a BB. Thank you, Terri!!
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- Amazon Customer
- 06-07-21
Boundary Bible
I have read hundreds of self help books and never written a review before now. Everyone needs to read and practice these golden principles. It should be taught in school and if not, at the very least, in college. Even those who have good boundaries will greatly benefit from this material. For those with weak boundaries it is absolutely essential for a healthier and happier life, lived with integrity. I wish I had this many years ago. As a mental health counselor, I will recommend this book to my clients (and possibly require it at times). It not only explains but it also guides you in HOW to live in alignment with your own values and create more peace in the world, beginning with you.
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- Caroline Fernandes
- 06-08-21
Highly recommend!
I wish I had read this book 30 years ago. I could have avoided a great deal of unnecessary pain and disappointment.
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