Small Talk

10 ADHD Lies and How to Stop Believing Them

By: Richard Pink, Roxanne Pink

Narrated by: Richard Pink, Roxanne Pink

The beloved authors of Dirty Laundry break down the harmful stereotypes about people with ADHD to help you stop being your worst fear-leader, start bigging yourself up, and live your best neurodivergent life.

When “ADHD wife” Roxanne Pink and neurotypical husband Richard Pink asked their community of 2.5 million what the biggest ADHD struggle is, the thousands of replies changed everything. As they learned, the real enemy isn’t productivity or focus, but the toxic ADHD core beliefs we’ve internalized.

With candor and kindness, they share personal stories to highlight and reframe the 10 big lies that ADHD people believe about themselves. From “I am lazy” to “Everybody hates me” and “I quit everything I start,” Small Talk will empower ADHDers and those who love them to navigate life with compassion, humor, and hope. Whether you were diagnosed early or are new to the neurospicy community, Small Talk will change your relationship with yourself and others.

Learn how to:
• Identify your limiting ADHD beliefs
• Break free from neurotypical standards
• Support and understand your ADHDers
• Adopt a self-kindness mindset
• Communicate your needs & boundaries
• Celebrate the joys of ADHD

Critic reviews

“A godsend!”—Davina McCall

Highly recommended for Neurodivergents and the neurotypicals that love them!!!!!

This book is full of helpful information both for neurodivergents (ND) and their loved ones that want to support them, as well as plenty of stories of the struggles of neurodivergence which is relatable for the NDs and hopefully revealing new info for the Neurotypical loved ones of NDs.

They team up really well to read this book in such a “conversation with friends sitting on the couch” type of manner that was so inviting for me. I already have been watching them on their social medias and loved their content from there first.

I can see this book changing the lives of NDs, and being extremely beneficial.

Bonus? For me, their accents , especially Rox’s are lovely to my American ears. Additionally, her music is so purely punk like I grew up with, she is extremely talented and I love all of it I’ve heard.

Moving & Vulnerable

This book is a beautiful and natural continuation of their first. It delves deeply into the self-worth struggles of neurodivergence. I can't recommend this highly enough! Listen and learn how to love better.

I don’t have words and I am 36 min in

I am in my kitchen, it’s one in the morning and im crying tears of overwhelm, awe, and disbelief as I am only 36 minutes into this book that is actively changing my life. I cannot explain this without composing a ridiculously long run on sentence. Bear with it, please. No one has ever understood me like this. While I know this book was not written dedicated to me, Ashley, it was written for me and for others who feel even an ounce like me, of that I am certain. Here goes. I am a 40 year old single mom, my seven year olds only parent, work one, over full time job and three part time jobs, just got into nursing school after being on a six year wait list, have had severe CPTSD, trauma that has shot my nervous system starting from childhood through just 8 years ago when I found myself 3 months pregnant and escaping an extremely abusive relationship to a clinically diagnosed sociopath (Antisocial personality disordered individual) and then for the next two years, went into hiding. So severe that I went from 135 pounds down to 89 soaking wet, all from a nervous system that should have led me institutionalized had it not been for my mentor, boss, and great friend, who just so happen to be a trauma surgeon and have a degree is psychiatry as well. I have been in trauma focused, somatic, EMDR therapy, been to several therapists until finally finding an incredible therapist who I have had the pleasure of working with for the last 2 years. I have researched and read every last damn book on the planet, and of course meditated hot bubble bathed, journaled, yoga’d, law of attracted, manifested and affirmation’d my way - to no fn avail- at an attempt to, what I now understand was, abandoning myself. I have actively developed parts of myself, many parts of myself to assist me in this quest of self abandoning. Ones that have worked me to the bone, helped me function on a couple of hours of sleep, talked so much sh to myself that I wouldn’t dare give myself grace. Parts that helped me survive and also destroyed who I am at my core, all in one fail swoop. A little over a month ago, I was diagnosed as having, as the psychiatrist said “severe, SEVERE, ADHD” and “one of the most severe cases he had seen in years”. Coming from a psychologist who is most definitely past the age of retirement, that seems like it was saying a lot. Me? Oh well I was fn clueless. I wasn’t an 8 year old boy who was so hyper he couldn’t sit down so … that never even crossed my mind… until it did. Until I learned. Until I researched. Until I learned things like “inattentive” and “hyper focused” and “pathological demand avoidance” and “time blindness” and “revenge bedtime procrastination” And then my offended part of “how dare you think I need a psychiatrist” turned into a F*n life that from one day to the next, actually made sense. It didn’t change - me It gave me words to explain me to me It so far, has allowed me just enough room to question the endless loop of daily “I FN hate myself’s”. During this time I found Rox on YouTube and my fn god she gave my life so much validation. She gave my existence room to just BE. Her supportive honey - well, I’m still jaded in believing in love and trust and support, but he has at the very least, put a tiny sparkle of hope that maybe, I’m also deserving of something ACTUALLY real, too. This book, specifically Lie Number 2, has unequivocally, opened up a part of my being that has been hiding so damn deep that it had been basically snuffed out. It has given me, dare I say HOPE, that I can actually not only love myself, but LIKE myself. That trying harder, is in a very real way, part of, if not THE thing that has been in the way of accepting who I am. This has been long and still there are not words to how I feel right now. What I can say is that without a shadow of a doubt, I am with one million percent confident in saying, you HAVE to read (or listen) to this book. Ps: thank you both, for the energy and the love that you poured into every page. It is, for not one word, not felt. I think you just changed my life. I think you just changed my seven year olds son life, by changing mine. With love, gratitude, and an abundance of respect, Ashley J. Snyder

Amazing Book

Loved every minute of this book. I now know I am not alone. I recommend this for anyone who is wanting to understand ADHD better.

perspective

This book will give you a sense of comfort, understanding and, a new outlook on some of one's behavior and thoughts: anxiety, forgetting things, being all over the place and, (this brought me comfort) facing the darkness that comes along with ADHD.
I learned some valuable things that I started to teach to my 12 year old daughter just after listening to a few chapters.
Particularly, "what would you do if you heard someone saying all the negative things you tell yourself to someone you care about?"
It's similar, slightly, to "if a tree falls in the forest and no one is around, does it still make a sound?" However, that is a very important and profound way of dealing with the negative things we tell ourselves.
Unfortunately, it can lead to letting our darkness win and finally, blowing out the smallest little flame that has been barely holding on. And thus, lights out.

(That is only ONE of many examples that will open up your mind).

Bravo 👏 to Rich & Roxy...and thank you.