
How to Be Enough
Self-Acceptance for Self-Critics and Perfectionists
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Narrated by:
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Ellen Hendriksen
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By:
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Ellen Hendriksen
About this listen
“Psychologist and therapist Ellen Hendriksen has a likable, easygoing narrating style that holds together the impressive amount of useful information in her latest audiobook.”—AudioFile
This program is read by the author.
Are you your own toughest critic? Learn to be good to yourself with this clear and compassionate guide.
Do you set demanding standards for yourself? If so, a lot likely goes well in your life: You might earn compliments, admiration, or accomplishments. Your high standards and hard work pay off.
But privately, you may feel like you’re falling behind, faking it, or different from everybody else. Your eagle-eyed inner quality control inspector highlights every mistake. You try hard to avoid criticism, but criticize yourself. Trying to get it right is your guiding light, but it has lit the way to a place of dissatisfaction, loneliness, or disconnection. In short, you may look like you’re hitting it out of the park, but you feel like you’re striking out.
This is perfectionism. And for everyone who struggles with it, it’s a misnomer: perfectionism isn’t about striving to be perfect. It’s about never feeling good enough.
Dr. Ellen Hendriksen—clinical psychologist, anxiety specialist, and author of How to Be Yourself—is on the same journey as you. In How to Be Enough, Hendriksen charts a flexible, forgiving, and freeing path, all without giving up the excellence your high standards and hard work have gotten you. She delivers seven shifts—including from self-criticism to kindness, control to authenticity, procrastination to productivity, comparison to contentment—to find self-acceptance, rewrite the Inner Rulebook, and most of all, cultivate the authentic human connections we’re all craving.
With compassion and humor, Hendriksen lays out a clear, effective, and empowering guide. To enjoy rather than improve, be real rather than impressive, and be good to yourself when you’re wired to be hard on yourself.
A Macmillan Audio production from St. Martin’s Press Essentials.
©2025 Ellen Hendriksen (P)2025 Macmillan AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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Story
Through nine easy-to-follow strategies, Dr. David H. Rosmarin demonstrates how to harness the power of anxiety to learn about ourselves, deepen our relationships with others, and achieve our deepest goals and dreams.
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It is well worth your time and money
- By @DrCarlHoffman on 11-01-23
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The Perfectionist's Dilemma
- Learn the Art of Self-Compassion and Become a Happy Achiever
- By: Tara Cousineau
- Narrated by: Candace Joice
- Length: 10 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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In today's high-pressure society, we are constantly fed a fable of individualism, exceptionalism, determination, and ingenuity and taught a mythology of grin and bear it; no pain, no gain; and hard work pays off, despite the fact that the conditions for success are unpredictable and ever changing. Psychologist Tara Cousineau claims that perfectionism is a paradox: it is the tension created by the need for belonging, a desire for excellence, and a quest for a meaningful and productive life.
By: Tara Cousineau
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Tidy Up Your Life
- Rethinking How to Organize, Declutter, and Make Space for What Matters Most
- By: Tyler Moore
- Narrated by: Tyler Moore
- Length: 5 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Tyler Moore felt his life resembled an overstuffed closet: disorganized and overly busy behind tidy, closed doors. When it all became too much—for his family's 750-square-foot apartment and his mental health—he set out to unpack the physical and emotional mess around him. Chronicling his progress as “Tidy Dad” on Instagram, Moore learned that tidying is about so much more than the aesthetics and decluttering of a physical space. When he stepped back, reflected, and named what was "just enough," he was able to devise systems and hacks that brought order to his whole life.
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A gentle, calm ASMR of a read!
- By G. Jurczyk on 03-15-25
By: Tyler Moore
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Beyond Anxiety
- Curiosity, Creativity, and Finding Your Life's Purpose
- By: Martha Beck
- Narrated by: Martha Beck, Maria Shriver
- Length: 11 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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We live in an epidemic of anxiety. Most of us assume that the key to overcoming it is to think our way out. And for a while it works. But there is always something that sends us back into the anxious spiral we’ve been trying to climb out of. In Beyond Anxiety, Dr. Martha Beck explains why anxiety is skyrocketing around you, and likely within you. She also tells you how to not only reduce your anxiety but use it to propel you into a life filled with peace, meaning, and joy.
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Good tips on dealing with anxiety
- By andrea l vu on 02-18-25
By: Martha Beck
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The Perfection Trap
- Embracing the Power of Good Enough
- By: Thomas Curran
- Narrated by: Sid Sagar
- Length: 7 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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Today, burnout and depression are at record levels, driven by a combination of intense workplace competition, oppressively ubiquitous social media encouraging comparisons with others, the quest for elite credentials, and helicopter parenting. Society continually broadcasts the need to want more, and to be perfect. Gathering a wide range of contemporary evidence, Curran calls for both introspection and broader, societal change. He shows what we can do as individuals to resist the modern-day pressure to be perfect, and in so doing, win for ourselves a more purposeful and contented life.
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The Answers I Didn’t Know I Needed
- By John on 08-14-23
By: Thomas Curran
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Overcoming Social Anxiety
- By: Ellen Hendriksen, The Great Courses
- Narrated by: Ellen Hendriksen
- Length: 2 hrs and 35 mins
- Original Recording
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Social anxiety is the perception that something is wrong with us or that we’re deficient in some way in a group setting. And unless we work hard to conceal that perceived flaw, it will be revealed, and people will judge or reject us for it.
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A Useful Guide to the Problem
- By Gilbert M. Stack on 06-07-23
By: Ellen Hendriksen, and others
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Ordinary Magic
- The Science of How We Can Achieve Big Change with Small Acts
- By: Gregory M. Walton PhD
- Narrated by: Gregory M. Walton PhD, Hattie Tate
- Length: 14 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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The emotional questions we face can define our lives. If you’re expecting an interaction to go wrong, that expectation can make it so. That’s spiraling down. But as esteemed Stanford psychologist Greg Walton shows, when we see these questions clearly, we can answer them well. Known to social psychologists as wise interventions, these shifts in perspective can help us chart new trajectories for our lives. They help us spiral up. This is ordinary magic: The ordinary experiences that help us set aside the ordinary worries of life to unleash extraordinary change.
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So simple and so profound
- By S. Ma on 05-17-25
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You Are Enough
- Escaping Narcissism and Codependency and Creating Self-Love
- By: RH P
- Narrated by: Cassandra Buck
- Length: 1 hr and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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Have you ever felt like you’re never good enough? Do you feel like everything is your fault? Answering yes to these questions displays the awful side effects of narcissistic abuse. It’s these side effects that hold us back in life, keeping us frozen and insecure. As a therapist and a survivor of abuse myself, I know how you feel. I see you. The good news is that you can overcome limiting and toxic beliefs that were instilled by narcissists.
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Eye-opening and Nurturing
- By Dolfus Bafflepot on 05-21-21
By: RH P
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The Art and Science of Connection
- Why Social Health Is the Missing Key to Living Longer, Healthier, and Happier
- By: Kasley Killam
- Narrated by: Cindy Kay
- Length: 7 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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A groundbreaking redefinition of what it means to be healthy that introduces the need for social health—the part of wellbeing that comes from feeling connected—to truly flourish. Exercise. Eat a balanced diet. Go to therapy. Most wellness advice is focused on achieving and maintaining good physical and mental health. But Harvard-trained social scientist and pioneering social health expert Kasley Killam reveals that this approach is missing a vital component: human connection.
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Let’s Connect
- By Hall Johnson on 12-02-24
By: Kasley Killam
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Fierce Self-Compassion
- How Women Can Harness Kindness to Speak Up, Claim Their Power, and Thrive
- By: Kristin Neff
- Narrated by: Jean Ann Douglass
- Length: 12 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Kristin Neff changed how we talk about self-care with her enormously popular first book, Self-Compassion. Now, 10 years and many studies later, she expands her body of work to explore a brand-new take on self-compassion. Although kindness and self-acceptance allow us to be with ourselves as we are, in all our glorious imperfection, the desire to alleviate suffering at the heart of this mindset isn't always gentle, sometimes it's fierce.
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Liberal Activism distracting
- By Janiene on 07-26-21
By: Kristin Neff
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Validation
- How the Skill Set That Revolutionized Psychology Will Transform Your Relationships, Increase Your Influence, and Change Your Life
- By: Caroline Fleck PhD
- Narrated by: Caroline Fleck PhD
- Length: 9 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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We all spend a lot of energy trying to get people to listen to us, and despite our best efforts, we often fail. But what if the secret to influencing others was to demonstrate acceptance? Enter validation—communication where one accepts and sees the validity in another person’s experience. Research on validation shows that it has profound effects, from improving relationships and de-escalating conflicts to increasing one’s influence and self-compassion.
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A work of LOVE
- By Mark A. Tomski, M.D. on 02-25-25
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Less Nice, More You
- Stop Hiding & Become the Most Bold, Authentic Version of You Now
- By: Dr. Aziz Gazipura PsyD
- Narrated by: Dr. Aziz Gazipura PsyD
- Length: 7 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Have you been too nice for too long? Have you tried to speak up for yourself, have better boundaries, or take care of your own needs, only to feel anxious, stuck, or guilty? The unfortunate truth is people-pleasing and excessive niceness are debilitating patterns that most people never truly change. They remain in this “cage of niceness” until their final days, when they experience a strong sense of regret for living a life that wasn’t truly their own.
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I love Aziz. He's changed my life.
- By shannon maraghy on 08-06-24
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Radical Self-Acceptance
- By: Tara Brach
- Narrated by: Tara Brach
- Length: 3 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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According to Dr. Tara Brach, feelings of shame and unworthiness are the source of many problems we experience with our relationships, careers, creative endeavors, and most fundamentally, our spiritual unfolding. On Radical Self-Acceptance, this respected clinical psychologist and Buddhist meditation teacher shows you how to free yourself from the grip of your insecurities about being "good enough."
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Tara Brach knows how to speak to the heart
- By The Burnetts on 08-28-12
By: Tara Brach
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Secrets of Adulthood
- Simple Truths for Our Complex Lives
- By: Gretchen Rubin
- Narrated by: Gretchen Rubin
- Length: 1 hr and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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The right idea, invoked at the right time, can change our lives. Drawing from her long studies of happiness, and also from the challenges she’s faced herself, writer Gretchen Rubin has discovered the “Secrets of Adulthood” that can help us manage the complexities of life. To convey her conclusions, she turned to the aphorism—the ancient literary discipline that demands that a writer convey a large truth in a few words.
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this is just an audiobook of someone saying phrases that other people have already said.
- By Jaclyn Smith on 04-02-25
By: Gretchen Rubin
Accessible and actionable
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Revealing
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Super helpful tools to use immediately
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This book went to the next level and helped me understand perfectionists and how they can deal with it. While I don't consider myself a perfectionist (Good enough is my catch phrase ;-), it did help me understand some people in my life that are more like that and how they can deal with their strength and weakness (depending on the situation). Just like in the previous book, super funny, educational, and insightful. LOVED IT!
LOVED this book!
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worth every minute
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