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Publisher's Summary

A rollicking, globe-trotting adventure with a twist from the star of The X-Files and Californication, featuring Elsie, an unforgettable four-legged heroine.

Holy Cow by David Duchovny is a comic delight that will thrill fans of Jasper Fforde and Ben Aaronovitch. And anyone who enjoys a witty wisecrack in a novel.

Elsie Bovary is a cow and a pretty happy one at that. Until one night,Elsie sneaks out of the pasture and finds herself drawn to the farmhouse. Through the window she sees the farmer's family gathered around a bright Box God--and what the Box God reveals about something called an "industrial meat farm" shakes Elsie's understanding of her world to its core.

The only solution? To escape to a better, safer world. And so a motley crew is formed: Elsie; Shalom, a grumpy pig who's recently converted to Judaism; and Tom, a suave turkey who can't fly,but can work an iPhone with his beak. Toting stolen passports and slapdash human disguises, they head for the airport...

Elsie is a wisecracking, slyly witty narrator; Tom dispenses psychiatric advice in a fake German accent; and Shalom ends up unexpectedly uniting Israelis and Palestinians.

David Duchovny's charismatic creatures point the way toward a mutual understanding and acceptance the world desperately needs.

©2015 David Duchovny (P)2015 Macmillan Audio

Critic Reviews

"David Duchovny is a very smart and wryly entertaining actor, and now, novelist. Although I will never publicly admit to jealousy, I am having him killed." (Rob Lowe)

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  • Overall
  • Performance
  • Story
  • Pamela Kiewitt
  • 02-01-16

It's a laugh with a moral

Yes, it's pretty funny.
The author reads it even funnier.
Some parts don't make sense (like using technology at once but having to learn concepts), but it just adds to the charm.
And, of course you get your dose of moral with it.
I loved it!

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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  • Melonie
  • 01-21-16

Brilliant, fun and laughter told so well by David

Haven't read a book in ages but this really made me start, not only listen which was great being told by David Dechovney but also read the book aswell. Fun loving and crazy made me laugh and enjoy reading again.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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  • Natalie
  • 01-12-16

Cow-A-Bunga

Excellent, it's like the wonder years for barnyard animals. I can see this being animated in the vain of Archer.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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  • Golfmadiano
  • 10-04-15

Self aware cows......

I like David Duchovny but this is not good, it's like he's trying to teach you a lesson by reading you a children's story, at least it's pretty short.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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  • Mrs
  • 07-23-15

loved it!!

this was much better than I expected it to be, David narrates the book perfectly.. highly recommended!!!

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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  • Emily
  • 05-15-15

Very clever, really funny and thought provoking

Loved it, very well written. its been quite a while since a book has made me laugh out loud. Brilliant.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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  • Emma
  • 03-23-15

Brilliant & Funny

I absolutely loved this book. Brilliant and funny throughout. It's a must for everyone - adults and children will enjoy it equally.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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  • Bbrown
  • 02-27-15

Excellent.

An intelligent and witty social commentry of humanity and environmentalism. Didn't know what to expect but I loved this. Glad I got the audio book because Duchovony performance was entertaining and exactly how it supposed to sound

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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  • Luke Palmer
  • 11-26-17

Bonkers and fun!

David’s laid back performance compliments his comical story to no end. A fun and funny story, which can only be described as a children’s book for adults.

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 05-18-17

Refreshingly funny

I laughed so much at this book. The story is hilarious. It's light and refreshing, while delving into some tricky subjects.
It's improved even more by David's narration. His voice is soothing and easy to stay tuned into.
I found it difficult to turn off!