Bringing Up Bébé

One American Mother Discovers the Wisdom of French Parenting

By: Pamela Druckerman

Narrated by: Abby Craden

Length: 9 hrs and 8 mins

Publisher's summary

The secret behind France's astonishingly well-behaved children is here.

When American journalist Pamela Druckerman has a baby in Paris, she doesn't aspire to become a "French parent". French parenting isn't a known thing, like French fashion or French cheese. Even French parents themselves insist they aren't doing anything special.

Yet the French children Druckerman knows sleep through the night at two or three months old while those of her American friends take a year or more. French kids eat well-rounded meals that are more likely to include braised leeks than chicken nuggets. And while her American friends spend their visits resolving spats between their kids, her French friends sip coffee while the kids play.

Motherhood itself is a whole different experience in France. There's no role model, as there is in America, for the harried new mom with no life of her own. French mothers assume that even good parents aren't at the constant service of their children and that there's no need to feel guilty about this. They have an easy, calm authority with their kids that Druckerman can only envy.

Of course, French parenting wouldn't be worth talking about if it produced robotic, joyless children. In fact, French kids are just as boisterous, curious, and creative as Americans. They're just far better behaved and more in command of themselves. While some American toddlers are getting Mandarin tutors and preliteracy training, French kids are - by design - toddling around and discovering the world at their own pace.

With a notebook stashed in her diaper bag, Druckerman, a former reporter for The Wall Street Journal, sets out to learn the secrets to raising a society of good little sleepers, gourmet eaters, and reasonably relaxed parents. She discovers that French parents are extremely strict about some things and strikingly permissive about others. And she realizes that to be a different kind of parent, you don't just need a different parenting philosophy. You need a very different view of what a child actually is.

While finding her own firm non, Druckerman discovers that children - including her own - are capable of feats she'd never imagined.

©2012 Pamela Druckerman (P)2012 Random House

An interesting opinion to think about

If you could sum up Bringing Up Bebe in three words, what would they be?

unusual
French
straight

What was one of the most memorable moments of Bringing Up Bebe?

the end of the book which showed that the French method does work

What does Abby Craden bring to the story that you wouldn’t experience if you just read the book?

French accent - it was interesting to listen to for the first two or three hours, but it sometimes makes you feel tired. Though I don't know how she could show French accent better.

Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?

I am pregnant now so I am trying to listen to all the books about kids, so I didn't want to stop.

Any additional comments?

I liked the book and I liked the french method of bringing up kids, but still I cannot agree with every word. As for me, the success of this method depends on where you live - of course of it is France you will definitely succeed. But I doubt that you can bring up a baby French-style in the USA or Russia (I am from Moscow). There are a lot of interesting thoughts and advice about parenting, but still the most important thing is "the rhythm" which is French and is difficult to have in other countries. Anyway I liked the book and will listen to it again when my daughter is born - many interesting stories of parents and babies to think about.

Loved this book!

If you could sum up Bringing Up Bebe in three words, what would they be?

Refreshing, thought provoking, entertaining

Any additional comments?

My husband and I are expecting our first baby in about a month and I am so glad I listened to this book before he is born. My husband also loved the book and is the chef of the house so is excited to make a little gourmet out of our future offspring. In comparing french parenting styles to the over controlled, over worried, under 'educated' or disciplined American parenting was eye opening. It really made me relax a bit about our future and how we would parent. Some ideas I dont agree with and many I would love to incorporate into our future life. The story is told as that a story more than a 'how to' guide and that is what we love about it. Many points of view are discussed and lots of research is done but all in keeping to the story line and first hand accounts of an American living and raising children in Paris. I highly recommend it to anyone who has children or will in the future. So interesting and entertaining!

I enjoyed it...

... and learned a few things as well. I definitely will recommend to friends with kids.

A excellent book for all parents

Would you listen to Bringing Up Bebe again? Why?

Yes. The text is natural told, fluent, without too many scientific facts. Be aware: It's not a medic or a scientist writing about babies, it's a mother story. Brilliant.

Would you be willing to try another book from Pamela Druckerman? Why or why not?

Sure, her style is super amenable, intelligent and fluid.

What about Abby Craden’s performance did you like?

She's the best narrator that I've listened so far!French accent, intonation, punctuation, everything perfect. I will search for another titles with her as narrator.

Refreshing

I've been researching and studying Child Discipline and Parenting for 6 years, and this was the most refreshing "parenting" book I've ever read, hands down. I have a feeling it will always be my favorite! Intriguing, honest, permissible and comforting. Exactly what American parents need to hear.

Mom in Texas

I absolutely adored this book and the manner in which Druckerman folded in so many anecdotes and brilliant insights—both about French and American women/couples/institutions. I’m an attorney in my thirties and am not even a year into motherhood and so much about her book resonated with me. The neuroticism I embody proudly as a badge proving I’m a caring mother truly feels odd after reading this book. I feel as if Druckerman breathed some fresh perspectives into my lungs and set me free from some of the tethers of American culture that have weighed heavily upon me since even before my little one was born. This book is just so cleverly written. I also appreciated all of the French vernacular thrown into the mix—which is made all the sweeter through audio book because you have the benefit of hearing it as it should be pronounced, rather than reading it in black and white font with my English-speaking-mind butchering any attempt at pronouncing it. I absolutely recommend this book as a lighthearted and fun introduction to a culture of parenthood that feels much less stressful and yet, dare I say, even more rewarding. Bravo, Pamela! I am so thankful she wrote this book!

Zee Frrrensh do not all Zbeek like Zis

I assume the reader was directed to use her caricature of a French accent for all of the French speaking people who appear. At first I thought that perhaps the text was written that way, but no. It is distracting and tiresome, and actually detracts from the "authenticity" that it was probably intended to capture, especially since the actual conversations the author is recapturing probably occurred in French. Perfectly fine to use an accent for french words and phrases, like Creche and 'faire les nuits" of which there are many, but every French speaker in this reading comes off sounding like Pepe le Pew.
As to the text, I enjoyed it. And say what you like about child rearing "philosophies", the characterization of the Park Slope hothouse was great - "Brian, do you want your parsley snack?"

18 months later...

I bought this book the day I found out I was pregnant. It was among one of many and today is the only one I recommend! I followed its advice and reaped so many benefits. I only gained at the low end of the weight recommendations during my pregnancy and quickly bounced back after. Y body was back to normal by about 12 weeks after delivery.

Today, my baby is 9 months old. She slept through the night at around 10 weeks, happily eats whatever the grown-ups are eating, waits patiently at restaurants, and doesn’t need constant entertainment from me! I didn’t follow every bit of advice in this book, baby still sleeps in our room as recommended by the APA, but that’s about it.

Most importantly, I don’t feel the regular”mommy guilt” most American women are expected to feel! This book taught me very early to relax. Baby will be fine, sugar happens, and she doesn’t need a snack every hour!

The only advice that didn’t work for me was the bit about almond oil preventing stretch marks. I used it religiously and still got them, though not as bad as I thought they would be.

wonderful!

I wish I had read this book 5 1/2 years ago. if you are struggling with being exasperated with your children this book is a must read. I wish I could give this book to every mother. I wanted to stand up and applaud at the end of the book but didn't for fear I would look like a crazy person to people around me. I must say I did try some of the things she talked about in the book before I finished reading and it did work. I have never written a review for a book before but I had to on this one. I will be reading this book again!

Best parenthood book yet

I read at least 20 books upon becoming a novice parent. Still have no idea what I'm doing but this book is the ONE that made the biggest impression. Its straightforward yet gets at the nuances of parenting in in any society (not just French) quite well! Its about looking around, assessing the new norm, and then determining who you realistically are as a parent.