Showing results by narrator "Joe Hempel" in All Categories

Horror movie starlet Clarissa Lee is beautiful, internationally known, and completely broke. To cap off years of questionable financial and personal decisions, Clarissa accepts an invitation to participate in a "fully immersive" fan convention. She arrives at an off-season summer camp and finds what was supposed to be a quick buck has become a real-life slasher movie.

Everyone’s heard stories about ghost ships. But they’re just stories, right? On the hunt for a missing friend, Marcus and Solomon find a massive black ship in the unexplored regions. Now, they have to find a way to save their trapped friend, and defeat a galaxy-threatening danger. It won’t be easy, but that won’t stop Marcus. He never leaves a friend behind, and this time won’t be any different.

In this dark and hilarious new adventure, Andrew has started up a private investigation business with his best friend Roger (slogan: "We Solve Weird Problems"). Since his options in life will become somewhat more limited after his wife Helen gives birth to triplets, it's his last-ditch effort to get out of being stuck with a corporate day job. One of their first clients is an attractive woman named Shirley. Keeping with the kind of luck Andrew has had his entire life, her problem is: "I think I may be a serial killer".

Six-foot-9 and 400 pounds, hailing from parts unknown, he is the one-man walking gore machine of the Deep South Wrestling Conference, and his name is Goon. But Detective Phillip Straker isn't a wrestling fan. The bodies pile up like dirty laundry: sex-obsessed tramps used as playthings by some unspeakable creature. Straker is determined to solve the rash of mutilation murders with trimmings that beg description. Is it just coincidence, or do all the victims have something in common?

The first in-depth examination of the voice intelligence industry, The Voice Catchers exposes how artificial intelligence is enabling personalized marketing and discrimination through voice analysis.

Evan Portin is at a sad, scary place in his life. While taking a long walk to compose himself and figure out where to go from here, he encounters a young woman being mugged in a park. When he tries to intervene, he discovers that she doesn't need his help. At all. Her name is Harriett. She is very, very good at defending herself. Everything she owns is in a large backpack. She's never seen a cell phone. She's never been in a car. She's never really ventured into the outside world. And she says she's traveling across the country to slay a Cyclops. She's crazy, right?

John Rast went to the Ren Faire looking for a fight. Well, a simulated fight, with blunt swords and safety equipment. But when his final opponent turns into a living, fire-breathing dragon, John finds himself in the fight of his life. It's John or nothing stopping a disaster in its tracks - and the only real weapon at hand is his mom's Volvo. So John decides to let it roll....

Become relentless, persistent, and unstoppable in achieving your goals. Mental toughness is one of the biggest differences between the life you want and a life you settle for. Mental Toughness & Iron Will is a guidebook into becoming someone who stops at nothing to achieve their goals. Train yourself to prepare for the worst while expecting the best.

The first three books in the Jonathan Shade series. Includes Modern Sorcery: Death by dark magic. As soon as I get over my ex, her father hacks her mother apart with a sword. She hires me to prove dark magic was involved. Hey, it's what I do as a paranormal investigator, so I get why she thinks I can help. But my secretary, Esther, a ghost from the 1920s flapper era, and Kelly Chan, my magically engineered protector, are dead-set against me getting involved. With all the deadly magic flying around, they may have a point.

Reclusive chef Heinrich Schauer has invited six guests to a blind 12-course tasting menu. As they eat, each guest is overtaken by carnal appetites, unaware of their host's savage plan - or of the creature lurking below.

After receiving a large insurance settlement, young couple Gwen and George fulfill a dream by buying their own little island, a secluded, private paradise surrounded by a lush green landscape of plants. What the real estate man didn't tell them was that a tragedy took place years earlier in the cool, clear pool near the house. And the waters still hold a terrifying centuries-old secret. Soon George begins to notice strange changes in his wife.

A couple of jerks wake me up at the crack of noon. Seems my klepto uncle stole an ancient deck of Tarot cards from a high-powered wizard, and too many losers want to ruin my day to get them back. The cards are cool, so I check them out, but my magic-happy cousin, Sabrina, tells me I'm not supposed to touch them. Oops. Too late. Now the damn cards are tuned to me, and if someone else wants to use them, I have to die. Why couldn't she have led with that information?

In the August heat they frolicked on the beaches, fetched sticks, played with the children. Then the summer dwellers left, abandoning them to the island's harsh winter. Ravenous hunger and violent rage have brought them together under a cunning, ferocious leader. Man has betrayed his best friend - now the dogs will have their day. It's a bitter winter, and the dogs of summer have grown hungry...and vicious!

Kim's curiosity reaches a fever pitch. Reaching out to the people who knew the Reeds, she ends up with conflicting accounts of their lives and habits. Nothing is making sense, and with every passing day, she becomes less sure of what she knows. An unmarked grave just outside the woods. A series of revelatory dreams. A large, mysterious light fixture hiding in among the trees. When Kim switches on the amber light, she discovers the truth behind the disappearance of Marshall and Dakota Reed. Indeed, she learns far too much.

X is trapped living in the slums of the last remaining city on Earth. He can only venture out beyond the towering walls to scavenge relics of the old world when the sun is up. At night, like everybody else, he hides inside from the monsters of the shadows...until an unexpected death occurs a little too close to home. With the blame on his shoulders, and trigger-happy guards on his trail, X has no choice but to run. But the city was never a safe place to begin with, not really, and his only slim chance of survival lies outside the walls, in a landscape empty of humanity.

Too many working parents focus solely on those around them, completely losing sight of what they need themselves. But neglecting your own needs and wants can prevent you from being healthy, productive, and happy. Taking Care of Yourself provides expert advice to help you identify what you value most out of your work and home life, make choices that align with those values, and manage the emotions that come with them. 

He didn't want to be in the game. Now, he has to save it. Killed on the first day on the job, 25-year-old police officer Nyle Maxwell finds his mind uploaded to Capes Online, the world's biggest and most popular VRMMORPG. Yet, the one-way, mind-to-game upload process means that Nyle can never return to his physical body. Now, he must become a real superhero and protect Capes Online from both hostile players and malevolent AIs and NPCs alike that seek to destroy the game itself.

On a cold, rainy night in Seattle, a legendary journalist is found facedown in the street below a posh high-rise. Local police are calling it a suicide, but Alex Vane sees signs of murder. With help from a brash young journalist, Alex pieces together clues from the dead man's extraordinary career. But an unexpected discovery leads him to believe that all those legendary scoops may have been built on a lie so great it led to his murder.

Hannah Stuart has spent her life loving a man who barely knows she exists. Finally fed up with her situation, she decides it's time to start over somewhere new, but a catastrophe brings her plans to a screeching halt and forces her to endure encounter after encounter with her brother's best friend. AKA: the man of her dreams.

It’s Halloween night in 1987. The era of fast cars, big hair, and glam metal is in full swing. A group of young friends push their appetite for destruction to the limit as they race along dark and dangerous back roads in search of a rumored epic spook night beer bash out in the boonies. But things take a tragic turn when they encounter a smirking villain in a sinister black car. They become trapped in haunted nightmare country with no obvious way out. Before long, it’s time to strap in tight, grab another cold one, and race with the devil. First to the finish line might even get to live.