International Bereaved Mother’s Day is this upcoming Sunday, May 5, 2024. This day is for us to show our love for our babies gone to heaven far too soon. Sunday, May 12, 2024 in the US we celebrate Mother’s Day. Mother’s Day can be very challenging, difficult emotionally, and with social distancing and quarantine can and will be very lonely for many Sisters in Loss. Today’s episode is my love letter to you letting you know that You are a Mother! All of the needle pokes, disappointing news, positive and negative pregnancy tests, exciting feelings of baby movement, to holding your baby in your arms after they have taken their last breath made you a mother. Don’t let anyone make you feel different on Mother’s Day.

On Sunday, do what you need to do. Watch church online, make you a bomb brunch with mimosas, cry hard, stay home, and facetime or houseparty with family and friends will make the day better. Do it all. Sunday is your Mother’s Day.

You are amazing! You are brave! You are beautiful! You are loved! You are blessed! You are a Mom.

Happy Mother’s Day Sister in Loss!

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April is Sisters in Loss Infertility Awareness Month! All month long we will be highlighting infertility stories and journey’s.

Black Maternal Health week was April 11-17 and Infertility Awareness Week is April 18-24. This week we are talking about reproductive health.

Did you know that some midwives specialize in high risk births and pregnancy after loss or infertility?

Today’s guest is a Certified Nurse Midwife and founder of Sakina Health who partners with birthing families to inspire them to become savvy birthers. After spending nearly two decades as a midwife with nearly 1000 births in the hospital, birth center, and home, Takiya Ballard knows what it truly means to offer a unique type of healthcare that is unbiased and respectful in every way.

In this episode we deep dive into the State of Black Maternal Health, we discuss the differences between midwifery and doulas, her podcast The Savvy Black Birther, and creating the right birth team for us as black women.

This episode is for you to listen to if you want to learn how to create the right birth team for you, the differences of midwifery and doulas, and how you can take control of your reproductive health.

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Black birth stories have joy and they also do have trauma. In today's episode we dive into the creator of the Black Birth Story blog Shayla Brown's own birth story and journey to becoming a mom. Shayla has been pregnant over 10 times with a few miscarriages and one heterotopic pregnancy that resulted in her losing a fraternal twin ectopically and being currently pregnant with the other twin. She shares her journey through grieving while mothering and removing negative emotions, recognizing and defining her emotions, and talking through those emotions with trusted professionals and therapist.

This episode is for you to listen to if you have experienced loss in between earth side babies and how to manage your emotions through it all. Black birth stories are joyful and we can birth trauma free.

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Parenting after loss is a journey. It's important to make space for conflicting emotions. Don't put pressure on yourself to feel that having another baby will resolve or put an end to the pain of a previous loss. It's okay to feel happiness and sadness at the same time. Life may be moving on, but this doesn't mean you have to let go of a previous loss.

In today's episode Helena Morais shares her stillbirth story and pregnancy after loss journey and inspiration for Malia's present. She lost her daughter Malia due to preclamsia leading to a placenta abruption. She grieved and tried again and was blessed with her son Arinze. She shares her journey to healing through her sprituality and developing gifts in honor of her daughter Malia.

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Parenting after loss is a journey. It's important to make space for conflicting emotions. Don't put pressure on yourself to feel that having another baby will resolve or put an end to the pain of a previous loss. It's okay to feel happiness and sadness at the same time. Life may be moving on, but this doesn't mean you have to let go of a previous loss.

In today's episode we have Nkemka Egbudo back to share her journey of parenting after loss being a mom to a 1 year old. We talk about what is like to honor your angel baby and earthly baby and the hopes she has as she parents her daughter but also acknowleding her loss.

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Below are some coping tips that worked for me on how to Handle the Anxiety, Fear and Stress that comes with Pregnancy After Loss.

Focus on one day at a time. Easier said than done, right? But I always keep my favorite verse with me that "All things work together for the good of those who are called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28 If God has called you to be a mother especially for you to have another child it will happen, it is his purpose for your life. I learned to take my pregnancy one day at a time because I celebrated what was good, different, and better about my new pregnancy. I paid attention to what's going well each day and how I was feeling and how the baby was moving and healthy. Remember each pregnancy is different, and the fact that you miscarried, had an infant loss or stillbirth does not mean this pregnancy will end that way.

Don't always expect to be happy and joyful all the time - We all have good and bad days when we are not pregnant so don't expect it to be joyful and happy all the time. Remind yourself that being pregnant again can be a scary experience.

Pray

Journal

Celebrate Milestones

Take Care of Yourself

Seek a Therapist, Coach, or Grief Counselor

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Congratulations! You are now pregnant and are ready to embark on another journey of bringing forth life. It can be a very difficult journey of pregnancy if you are not ready to face fear, anxiety, and any other preconceived feelings of pregnancy after loss.

Most women who become pregnant after experiencing miscarriage, stillbirth, or infant death find themselves hit by a flood of different emotions when they first discover that they’re pregnant again.

Below are some different emotions you may be feeling throughout your pregnancy and how to deal with them.

Mixed Feelings

Hesitation and Detachment

Anxiety concerning the timing of the pregnancy

Guilt

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Are you ready to try to conceive?

Today's episode is a solo episode by Founder Erica Michelle on Trying Again and Making the Decision to try to conceive.

Making the decision to try again is not an easy one. This decision may trigger many different emotions and bring on anxiety, fear, guilt, inadequacy, hopelessness, and a sense of failure. In this series I plan to equip you with the questions to ask yourself and your partner to prepare your mind, body, and inner self for another pregnancy.

Below are 3 questions you should ask yourself before you and your partner make the decision to begin to actively try to conceive after your loss.

1. Emotional Stability - Are you emotionally ready for another pregnancy?

2. Working through your grief - Have you taken time to grieve about the death of your baby?

3. Cautious Excitement - Are you mentally prepared for the challenges of a subsequent pregnancy?

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