• Zombie Rules: Zombie Rules, Book 1

  • By: David Achord
  • Narrated by: Graham Halstead
  • Length: 10 hrs and 34 mins
  • 4.4 out of 5 stars (1,603 ratings)

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Zombie Rules: Zombie Rules, Book 1

By: David Achord
Narrated by: Graham Halstead
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Publisher's summary

Rick, an aging Vietnam veteran, alcoholic, and prepper, convinces Zach Gunderson that the apocalypse is on the horizon. The two of them take refuge at a remote farm. As the zombie plague rages, they face a terrifying fight for survival. They soon learn, however, that the walking dead are not the only monsters.

©2013 David Achord (P)2015 Tantor

What listeners say about Zombie Rules: Zombie Rules, Book 1

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Teenage Wish Fulfillment Drivel

Where to begin?

The story is 'apocalypse by the numbers'.
Characters are so thin that if they turned sideways they'd vanish.
The writing varies in quality from painful to facepalm and stops at all points in between.
The dialogue especially is staggeringly bad.
Our hero, a teenager, knows absolutely everything about everything (astrology, history, farming, tactics and on and on), and is as adept at showing up teachers with his scholarly skills as he is grizzled old veterans with his planning and military acumen.
I cannot think of a single redeeming feature about this, except that the narrator does a creditable job which the material.
Women are useless in the apocalypse it seems.
At one point a character trades honey for used women's underwear. No, I'm not making this up but Iam getting miserable trying to review this. Honestly, it's utter drivel, so bad it could almost be a parody but it's just not that self-aware.
Try the Mountain Man books, or The Remaining books, but avoid this.

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66 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    3 out of 5 stars

JUST BECAUSE I'M CRAZY, DON'T MEAN

I'VE LOST MY MIND
I am Impatient and with many books and, I only get through three hours. I did listen to all 10+ hours of this, which says much. I bought the book, months ago but was not that excited to listen. Think I was put off by the cover and the reviews. It is not a bad book, and if the sequels go on sale, I will read on.

I REALIZED THEY WERE QUITE PREDICTABLE
This starts out as a YA book. Kid is a sophomore in High School, has crush on girl, Jock steals girl away from him, and than beats him up. This has a today twist of the beating going viral on U-tube. We are a couple of hours into the book before any Zombies appear. About once every other hour a Zombie wonders on to the scene, as if the writer went , Oh ya, this is called Zombie Rules. The rules are everything you already know about Zombies if you have read one other Zombie book. While I enjoyed the book, I had problems with the main character being a teenager and all these older men make him their leader. The prepper is an older man who magically makes Zach his friend, yet Zach is the one with the mature head on his shoulder and the one that solves all problems. The Zombies, were the same old Zombies and rarely even made an appearance. The kid has no raging hormones and kisses his girlfriend on the head a lot. The rules are like, Thanks Captain Obvious. There also seems to be a preoccupation with bodily functions. I know we all fart, relieve are bowels, take a leak and girls have menstrual periods and use tampons, but not sure why we constantly have to be reminded about it.

PAYBACKS ARE A BITCH
I know the narrator was good, cause I never ever thought of him. In most of my reviews I like to make a comment about the narrator. It was not until I got to the right now, that I realized that someone read the book to me. You can't get better than that.

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39 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    1 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    1 out of 5 stars

stupid

the author needs to get someone to proof read. this book is full of wrong info.

there is no such thing as a suppressed revolver.
the winchester model 94 is not a bolt action 30-06
mechanical fuel pumps don't need batteries
there are no mil dots on an ACOG sight
ar15's max range is not 400 meters

where did you come up with this crap?

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21 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars

Good Solid Zombie Title

No Nazi’s… No clowns… No God v Satan… Just a good solid traditional end of the world zombie story which is bound to keep you wanting more!

I had not heard of the author or the narrator before, but I will be sure to look for them in the future. The narration matched the characters perfectly. The speed of the narration was best played at 1.25x which in turned only shorted the total listening time a little.

I couldn’t but help think of another of my favourite zombie series ‘The Beginning of the End: Apocalypse Z’ when listening to this one. I just hope the second in the series doesn’t go down the same path of Apocalypse Z did. Not that it would be too bad if it did, but it is refreshing not read of some new even more crazy thing than the zombies.

What I did find interesting was unlike many in this genre, the author seems to be very restrained in describing disturbing details… forced sex scenes for example don’t have too many details.

This one really gets two thumbs up from me. It will provide hours of listening pleasure on a long travel to work. In fact I liked it so much I purchased the second in the series before I even finished the first!

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21 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    1 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    1 out of 5 stars

Juvenile angst meets poorly written zombie story

The only surprise about the book is the number of cliches that the author manages to weave into the story. The book is poorly written and the story is purile. If you are over 16, and have read a book before, then please avoid this book like the (zombie) plague. I couldn't return this one for a refund fast enough.

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20 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

A real good read with lots of adventure and humor.

What did you love best about Zombie Rules: Zombie Rules, Book 1?

More realistic main character and support characters. Still the most dangerous threat are other human beings.

What other book might you compare Zombie Rules: Zombie Rules, Book 1 to and why?

Better than the Adrians Diary series which I also like. Thank God the good guys are not always leaving their weapons out of reach or falling over, it only happens once in this book not every chapter. Good read :)

What does Graham Halstead bring to the story that you wouldn’t experience if you just read the book?

He's a good narrator with plenty of character in his voice.

Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?

Yes did it all in one sittiing.

Any additional comments?

I hope its not a long wait for the second edition. Also I hope that it is not a short book like a lot of authors seem to be doing with the next book in a series.

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14 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    2 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    3 out of 5 stars
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    2 out of 5 stars

I didn't even finish this book

What could have made this a 4 or 5-star listening experience for you?

I did not enjoy this book at all. The writing is poor, the characters are annoying and unbelievable, and nothing really exciting actually happens. The main character is a young teenager who, a few weeks in to the zombie apocalypse, becomes a sniper, expert at hand to hand combat, expert at survival, as well as a battle-hardened badass. The explanation that he's exceptionally intelligent just doesn't begin to cover why he's suddenly able to cut people's throats and shoot out kneecaps from afar. The beginning of the book treats every female character as a walking set of breasts, nothing more. The women are either stupid or manipulative, but you will hear the main characters refer to getting "pus*y" over and over again. One of the men even admits that he likes to have sex with women, he just doesn't particularly like their company. This is a common trope in sci-fi and horror, but it gets a little wearing. I didn't even finish the book, as I realized about 3/4 of the way through that I didn't care what happened to these people.

Has Zombie Rules: Zombie Rules, Book 1 turned you off from other books in this genre?

No

What do you think the narrator could have done better?

The narrator was great

What reaction did this book spark in you? Anger, sadness, disappointment?

Irritation, boredom

Any additional comments?

I realize I'm in the minority that don't like this book. For a good zombie series listen to The Remaining. You will not be disappointed.

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  • Overall
    1 out of 5 stars
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    1 out of 5 stars
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    1 out of 5 stars

Who wrote this crap!?!

What disappointed you about Zombie Rules: Zombie Rules, Book 1?

Horrible story line, as if a 13 year old boob infatuated boy wrote it.

What was most disappointing about David Achord’s story?

The poor plot line, the main character's stupidity when dealing with the female characters.

How did the narrator detract from the book?

The narrator seemed as bored and frustrated as I did listening.

What character would you cut from Zombie Rules: Zombie Rules, Book 1?

They all sucked.

Any additional comments?

Really, the author needs to grow up and quit stereo typing women.

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11 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    1 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    3 out of 5 stars
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    1 out of 5 stars

Ugh. Strictly for teenage boys.

What would have made Zombie Rules: Zombie Rules, Book 1 better?

Characters with some depth. This was strictly paint by numbers.

What do you think your next listen will be?

Something nonfiction for a total change of pace.

What aspect of Graham Halstead’s performance would you have changed?

The performance was fine. He didn't have anything inspiring to work with.

What character would you cut from Zombie Rules: Zombie Rules, Book 1?

Ugh, all of them. It was really bad.

Any additional comments?

This is strictly for teenage boys though I hope they don't listen to it as it is disturbingly misogynistic.

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10 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars

great

Great story. believable characters. however some weapon systems not depicted correctly; the rifle described as an accurate 3006 bolt gun out to 500 yards was titled a Winchester 94 which is a lever action of a different caliber. and thermal vision cannot depict images from behind glass. These are very minor inaccuracies but I feel they are important to readers of this genre. I found myself taken out of the story whenever I came across one.

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9 people found this helpful