The New One

Painfully True Stories from a Reluctant Dad

By: Mike Birbiglia, J. Hope Stein

Narrated by: Mike Birbiglia, J. Hope Stein

With laugh-out-loud funny parenting observations, the New York Times bestselling author and award-winning comedian delivers a book that is perfect for anyone who has ever raised a child, been a child, or refuses to stop acting like one.

"Mike Birbiglia and Jen Stein are the best collaborators since Emily Dickinson teamed up with her long-winded comedian friend. I'm joking because I cannot express how much this book affected me and how many times it made me cry." ―John Mulaney, comedian

In 2016 comedian Mike Birbiglia and poet Jennifer Hope Stein took their fourteen-month-old daughter Oona to the Nantucket Film Festival. When the festival director picked them up at the airport she asked Mike if he would perform at the storytelling night. She said, "The theme of the stories is jealousy." Jen quipped, "You're jealous of Oona. You should talk about that." And so Mike began sharing some of his darkest and funniest thoughts about the decision to have a child. Jen and Mike revealed to each other their sides of what had gone down during Jen's pregnancy and that first year with their child.

Over the next couple years, these stories evolved into a Broadway show, and the more Mike performed it the more he heard how it resonated—not just with parents but also people who resist all kinds of change. So he pored over his journals, dug deeper, and created this book: The New One: Painfully True Stories From a Reluctant Dad.

Along with hilarious and poignant stories he has never shared before, these pages are sprinkled with poetry Jen wrote as she navigated the same rocky shores of new parenthood.So here it is. This book is an experiment—sort of like a family.

"It's a page-turner, wise and wise-assed, the comic hit of the year. Whether you've been a parent or ever had one: you'll love this knockout!" ―Mary Karr, author of The Liars' Club

"Life is not the same after having children. It's delusional to pretend otherwise. But Mike Birbiglia and J. Hope Stein have not only survived, they're making their most hilarious and truthful art yet. This book might save your best friend's life." ―Lin-Manuel Miranda, Pulitzer Prize Winning composer of Hamilton

*A Finalist for the Thurber Prize for American Humor*

Critic reviews

"Mike Birbiglia and Jen Stein are the best collaborators since Emily Dickinson teamed up with her long-winded comedian friend. I'm joking because I cannot express how much this book affected me and how many times it made me cry."—John Mulaney, comedian

"Mike Birbiglia & J. Hope Stein have written the seminal parenting tome--side-splittingly funny from the first word to the last delicious bite. It's a page-turner, wise and wise-assed, the comic hit of the year. Whether you've been a parent or ever had one: you'll love this knockout!"—Mary Karr, authorof The Liars' Club, Cherry, and Lit

"Life is not the same after having children. It's delusional to pretend otherwise. But Mike Birbiglia and J. Hope Stein have not only survived, they're making their most hilarious and truthful art yet. This book might save your best friend's life."—Lin-Manuel Miranda, PulitzerPrize Winning writer of Hamilton

"This is a brilliant, funny, big-hearted version of he-said, she-said. Birbiglia and Stein trade jokes and poems and splendid storytelling about their roundabout stumble into parenthood. It's hilarious, humane, often beautiful, and absolutely captivating."—Susan Orlean, staff writer at The New Yorker and New York Times bestselling author of The Library Book

"The genius of this book is that Mike Birbiglia and J. Hope Stein have invented a totally new form. He tells incredibly funny stories. She gives a gorgeous, epic view of the same events, in poetry (she's a published poet who's been in The New Yorker). It's about what they went through together, not wanting to have kids, and then having kids, through these two very different lenses. Their diabolical writing trick: sometimes she delivers the laughs and he delivers the feelings."—Ira Glass, host of Public Radio's This American Life

"Fusing good humor and raw honesty with selections from Stein's evocative poetry, Birbiglia narrates his journey into parenting...Hilarious, relatable, cringeworthy, and effortlessly entertaining."—Kirkus (starred review)

"In a 'town where everyone is pretending to be happy and pretending to be in good marriage and pretending to be in a nice house' it takes a poet and a comedian to tell us the truth. What is this truth? That we are lost, but trying to find ourselves, that we are awkward but long for grace, we are cruel but delight at the slightest drop of tenderness. This book is hilarious because it shows us a mirror that doesn't lie. It sings because words give delight in each simplest moment. Imagine Groucho Marx and Jane Kenyon sit at the kitchen table and compose a book of days. When nothing else helps, it is a sense of humor and a beautiful song that will get us through."—Ilya Kaminsky, author of Deaf Republic and Dancing in Odessa

Funny, heartwarming, and most importantly funny

Mike is a master storyteller that turns vulnerable moments into hilarious anticdotes. It’s emotional, heart warming and beautiful. But all of that would be null and void if it wasn’t funny, but it just so happens to be very funny. It’s rare for a comedian to write a book that doesn’t give you the sense they’re either just bragging or someone else wrote it for them. But Mike’s humor is unique and relatable to every reader.

All the thread counts! Baby changes everything!

I’m a mom. And I knew my kid would change everything and so did my husband, even though he did not feel my overwhelming need to be a parent. Mike and Jen (does the nickname Clo get explained in other shows or books?) try to lie to themselves that their baby will not change everything. But in a twist that will surprise hardly anyone, Una does change everything. And it’s hard and it’s painful, insane, lonely, smelly and bizarre. But with a lot of work, some of their newfound lives are downright wonderful and awesome in that dumbstruck, awe-inspiring meaning of the word. Sleepless babies, poopy diapers, zombie parent half-life, these are very real things that very much suck. But a baby’s laughter is nuclear fusion level magic. It could birth fairies or melt the hearts of the cynical, overworked, lonely and lost. Parenthood is not for everyone. But this book is thirst-quenchingly beautiful. It’s soul food for any parent but especially the ones who might be burnt out, a bit delusional, pondering the fraying ties of their marriage or partnership and reworking their personal image with the impossibly huge role of parent, and trying to take tiny bites as life rolls over and through them. The poetry of this book ripples through my brain all the sweeter for the dulcet tones of Clo. Mike’s storytelling prowess is as powerfully delicious as pizza. Sometimes the toppings are bitter truths, and sometimes my heart gets overstuffed with all the feelings slices. While I do think even low-quality pizza can be enjoyable, and many a book about the life of new parents can entertain and spark thought, this entry in the genre is first rate, scrumptious stuff. Some parts simple and straightforward, some parts delicate and winsome. Gourmet etiquette notwithstanding, I want to stuff my mind and my heart with this book repeatedly and make book angels in the words, just as a child (or Mike Birbiglia) might dream of making pizza angels plopped on a huge pie, arms swathed in cheese and sauce, head pillowed by dough. Put this book in your brain and your belly.
(Disclaimer: the writer of this review does not recommend physically eating this book or the device playing this audiobook. Such action could result in injury or death. Learn about metaphors!)

Raw, Entertaining

There are plenty of moments in this book that made me laugh out loud, alone in my car or on a walk. There were also plenty of moments that I found myself laughing and cringing, simultaneously. This a very honest look at the experiences of Mike Birbiglia, and his wife during the first year of their daughter's life. Even while it was very entertaining, I found myself feeling kind of sad about this book when I reflected on it, in between listens and I was relieved to hear the Epilogue at the end. As a mother myself, with a very young child, I felt some of J. Hope Stein's poetry in a visceral way.

My one complaint was that I wish they could have found a way to mix the audio to balance the two narrator's voices. J. Hope Stein's voice is so soft that I had to crank up the volume every time she came on, only to have my eardrums blasted by Birbiglia's much stronger narration.

This is a book I would recommend for parents of children young and old, as well as those thinking about the prospect of parenting, who might be on the fence.

touching raw and funny

The imagination of Jen just shines throughout this book and deepens the story. If your a fan of Mike Birbiglia this will not disappoint but may drive you to more tears than his Netflix specials.

Really nice!

A very sweet and truthful telling of parenthood. I only wish the sound production could have evened out the difference in volume between Mike and Jenn's voices.