Shut Up, Your Kid Is Not That Great
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Shut Up, Your Kid Is Not That Great
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Narrated by:
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Phil Thron
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By:
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Jason Cole
About this listen
Are you a self-proclaimed "momager" or "dadager?" Do you think your kid is the ultimate best? This is the book for you!
Dear parents everywhere—we get it, you love your kid. But, let's face it: no matter how much you praise them, your kid is most likely not the next child prodigy. Be that as it may, we are pretty sure the neighbors are tired of hearing about how the fruit of your loins got the lead in the school play or scored the most points in the last game when they are just trying to grab a burger at the barbecue.
- Your kid can carry a tune? Shut up, they are not the next Whitney Houston.
- Your kid scored the most goals out of anyone on the soccer team? Shut up, they are not the next Cristiano Ronaldo.
- You didn't get straight As but your kid does? Shut up, they are not the next Elon Musk . . . although they might be one of his kids.
- Your kid spends 24/7 on their phone and has a TikTok account? Shut up, they are not the next big online influencer or YouTuber.
Filled with brief banter and an inspiring introduction with Tom Brady Sr., this book is sure to add a much needed laugh or two to every parent's day!
©2023 Viva Editions (P)2023 TantorListeners also enjoyed...
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 166
Lucas knows the perfect night entails just three things: video games, wine, and pad thai. Peanuts are a must! Other people? Not so much. Why complicate things when he’s happy alone? Then one day the apartment board, a vexing trio of authority, rings his doorbell. And Lucas’s solitude takes a startling hike. They demand to see his frying pan. Someone left one next to the recycling room overnight, and instead of removing the errant object, as Lucas suggests, they insist on finding the guilty party. But their plan backfires. Colossally.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Narrator doesn’t get Backman’s satire or rhythm
- By joey1603 on 12-01-24
By: Fredrik Backman, and others
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Born a Crime
- Stories from a South African Childhood
- By: Trevor Noah
- Narrated by: Trevor Noah
- Length: 8 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 215,287
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 194,765
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Story5 out of 5 stars 193,796
In this award-winning Audible Studios production, Trevor Noah tells his wild coming-of-age tale during the twilight of apartheid in South Africa. It’s a story that begins with his mother throwing him from a moving van to save him from a potentially fatal dispute with gangsters, then follows the budding comedian’s path to self-discovery through episodes both poignant and comical.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Great book and perfect narration
- By MarilynArms on 12-15-16
By: Trevor Noah
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The Best Man's Ghostwriter
- By: Matthew Starr
- Narrated by: Glen Powell, Nicholas Braun, Ashley Park, and others
- Length: 4 hrs and 37 mins
- Original Recording
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,164
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 1,129
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 1,129
A bad best man’s speech can ruin a wedding. Why do we plan every detail of a perfect day and then give the groom’s idiot best friend five minutes of total power? Enter Nate (Glen Powell), a speechwriter-for-hire who helps people write incredible best man speeches. To keep the best man from embarrassing himself (and the newlyweds), Nate uses his list of don’ts: Don’t mention the exes, don’t be rated R, and don’t bum everyone out. Nate’s system never fails. That is, until he meets Dan (Nicholas Braun).
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5 out of 5 stars
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SO GOOD
- By Csutty on 09-23-24
By: Matthew Starr
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The True Story of The Coward Brothers
- By: Elvis Costello
- Narrated by: T Bone Burnett, Elvis Costello, Rhea Seehorn, and others
- Length: 1 hr and 43 mins
- Original Recording
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 58
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 56
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Story4 out of 5 stars 56
The True Story of The Coward Brothers follows two musical brothers – one English, one American, both the illegitimate sons of dubious parentage who may, as they claim to be, "one and half-brothers" – perhaps a reference to the disparity in their height and relative talents.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Cute
- By Anonymous User on 11-26-24
By: Elvis Costello
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Slaughterhouse-Five
- By: Kurt Vonnegut
- Narrated by: James Franco
- Length: 5 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 18,991
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 16,978
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 16,953
Traumatized by the bombing of Dresden at the time he had been imprisoned, Pilgrim drifts through all events and history, sometimes deeply implicated, sometimes a witness. He is surrounded by Vonnegut's usual large cast of continuing characters (notably here the hack science fiction writer Kilgore Trout and the alien Tralfamadorians, who oversee his life and remind him constantly that there is no causation, no order, no motive to existence).
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4 out of 5 stars
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Don't Quit Your Daytime Job, James
- By Keith on 11-20-15
By: Kurt Vonnegut
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Very Unbecoming
- By: Emily Kron, Kate Hopkins
- Narrated by: Zoë Chao, Esther Povitsky, Amy Sedaris
- Length: 4 hrs and 31 mins
- Original Recording
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 160
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 157
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 157
When two childhood best friends blow up their respective romantic relationships, they make a time-sensitive pact: serial-cheater Chuck cannot sleep with anyone as she attends a three-month-long recovery group for cheaters, while sex-deprived Sofia vows to hook up with as many people as possible before recommitting to monogamy and tying the knot with her long-time fiancé. To keep things interesting, Chuck and Sofia decide to revive a past tradition from their summer camp days—also known as the dawning of sluthood.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Hilarious
- By Rachel on 11-21-24
By: Emily Kron, and others
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The Great Indoors
- By: Ginny Hogan
- Narrated by: Mae Whitman
- Length: 3 hrs and 53 mins
- Original Recording
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 363
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 356
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Story4 out of 5 stars 356
Alice's journey begins as all good journeys do: hitting on the sales guy at REI. After a tumultuous breakup, a quick career transition, family upheaval, and a sobriety journey that didn't fix her life quite as much as she expected it to, Alice decides that the only way to solve all her problems is to hike the Pacific Crest Trail. But as she begins preparing for the months-long quest, she realizes the answers she's seeking might not be on top of a snow-covered mountain. Especially since she just learned there was snow in California.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Chuck full of laughs to lift anyone's spirits.
- By Laura Boogaert on 09-22-24
By: Ginny Hogan
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I Can't Make This Up
- Life Lessons
- By: Neil Strauss - contributor, Kevin Hart
- Narrated by: Kevin Hart
- Length: 11 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 56,017
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 50,460
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 50,204
Superstar comedian and Hollywood box-office star Kevin Hart turns his immense talent to the written word by writing some words. Some of those words include: the, a, for, above, and even even. Put them together and you have the funniest, most heartfelt, and most inspirational memoir on survival, success, and the importance of believing in yourself since Old Yeller.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Best Audiobook I Ever Listened To
- By Sam Clear on 07-13-17
By: Neil Strauss - contributor, and others
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American Psycho
- By: Bret Easton Ellis
- Narrated by: Pablo Schreiber
- Length: 16 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 5,269
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 4,670
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Story4 out of 5 stars 4,678
Patrick Bateman moves among the young and trendy in 1980s Manhattan. Young, handsome, and well educated, Bateman earns his fortune on Wall Street by day while spending his nights in ways we cannot begin to fathom. Expressing his true self through torture and murder, Bateman prefigures an apocalyptic horror that no society could bear to confront.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Fanntastic book but maybe not for everyone....
- By So Fain on 03-27-11
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A Very Scalzi Christmas
- By: John Scalzi
- Narrated by: Khristine Hvam, Dina Pearlman, Kevin T. Collins, and others
- Length: 2 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 489
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 438
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 438
New York Times best-selling and Hugo Award-winning author John Scalzi gift-wraps 15 short takes on the holiday season - interviews with holiday notables, "informational" articles about TV specials and Christmas carols, short stories and poems, and even a couple of nods to Thanksgiving and New Year’s - and puts them all into a stocking stuffer-sized package that makes the perfect gift for friends, family, or yourself.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Very Scalzian indeed!
- By Andre Wallace Simonsen on 12-03-19
By: John Scalzi
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Breakfast of Champions
- By: Kurt Vonnegut
- Narrated by: John Malkovich
- Length: 6 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 4,317
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 3,893
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Story4 out of 5 stars 3,884
Breakfast of Champions (1973) provides frantic, scattershot satire and a collage of Vonnegut's obsessions. His recurring cast of characters and American landscape was perhaps the most controversial of his canon; it was felt by many at the time to be a disappointing successor to Slaughterhouse-Five, which had made Vonnegut's literary reputation.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Kurt Was Right to Grade This a C
- By Dubi on 01-10-16
By: Kurt Vonnegut