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Publisher's Summary

But It’s Your Family is a remarkable account of what it means to cut ties to toxic family abuse and thrive in the aftermath.

Loving someone doesn’t always mean having a relationship with them, just like forgiveness doesn’t always mean reconciliation. Reconciling, in many cases, only sets people up for more abuse. A significant part of healing comes with accepting that this is a part of life; there are some relationships that are so poisonous that they destroy one’s ability to be healthy and function best. Dr. Sherrie Campbell clarifies how parents, adult children, siblings, grandparents, and in-laws can be toxic while giving direction on how to explain cutting ties to children and others who may not understand. When listeners are able to bring closure to those toxic relationships, they give themselves the space to love those family members from a distance, as fellow human beings, with the knowledge that it is unwise to remain connected. In But It’s Your Family, listeners learn how to love themselves in the process and fundamentally change their lives for the better.

©2019 Dr. Sherrie Campbell (P)2020 Dr. Sherrie Campbell

What listeners say about But It’s Your Family...

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My second purchase! Well done!

I had the pleasure of reading this same book on my Kindle app several months ago. I enjoyed Dr. Campbell's real life story so much that I just had to purchase the audiobook version!

Sherrie's story is the most realistic and helpful that I have come across thus far. Unlike many authors in this genre, she doesn't offer a lot of psycho babble as though she were publishing a psych Ph.D dissertation.

One doesn't need to agree with everything the author espouses in this book - which is likely the case with any literature. Yet I do believe that most readers will be moved by Sherrie's professional competence, deeply personal and engaging writing style.

Exceptionally well done, Dr. Campbell!

9 people found this helpful

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This woman has some serious issues.

What is said between her own toxic traits is good. To write an entire book about how horrible her family is just makes me think that she is the one who is doing these toxic traits she speaks of. I was more hoping this book would be just the facts and not about her own story. In my opinion this author has some serious self esteem issues and her own mental health needs work. I know people like this and I can see through the bs a mile away. So, when she starts talking about herself try not to keep rolling your eyes.

8 people found this helpful

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Healing

I would absolutely recommend this book to anyone who has dealt, or is dealing, with trauma, abuse, or manipulation. I just made the choice to go no contact with toxic and hurtful family. I found this book to be direct and to the point, but also kind. It gave me an idea of what to expect, further resources, and a sense of genuine hope. This book gently reassured me that I was more than the abuse I endured and that I had value and could set firm boundaries and still be a good person. I found the author’s voice to be soothing. I appreciated the calm sincerity and assurance in her voice while broaching such a difficult and emotional subject.

8 people found this helpful

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  • 12-06-20

Best of the best! Highly recommend

Even though I m only in the first chapter, I feel every single words shout out for me! Years of being emotional abused and manipulated by my own mother, till now I realize ITS NOT MY FAULT! It explains why I constantly feel fury every time after I interact with my mother. The consequences are very well explained and described in the book. I m so happy that I purchased this book! It seems it’s the only book the author wrote so far. But I will definitely purchase more of her in the future.
The miracle is that I didn’t grow up in US but in a small corner of the other side of the world, but I still feel every word speaks for me!

4 people found this helpful

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Wonderful resource

Dr. Campbell, thank you for writing this book, your heart felt thoughts have been so validating and healing. Thank you for the insight and encouragement provided. This is a very good resource in navigating my way out of my toxic family. Simply amazing!

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Ten Out of Five Stars!!

This audiobook brought me to tears many times while listening. Some for Dr. Campbell and her heartbreaking story, but more for me and hearing so much of my pain/grief expressed into words (finally)! Although my pain arises from my relationship as the “scapegoat” with my in-laws, as I drove along in my car listening, my head would subconsciously be nodding gregariously in solidarity with her message. Yes, yes, yes!!

This is a life-changing book for me. Thank you Dr. Campbell.

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Some stuff is helpful some stuff feels like still unresolved trauma responses

A little too much white evangelism in this book for me. If you’re uncomfortable with people talking about god and angels, I’d recommend not picking this up. If that’s your jam, you’ll love it. I appreciate the author for writing this book about a topic that is both extremely personally painful and taboo. I found many of the things she said deeply resonated with my experience with my toxic family, but the style and tone of the book is extremely off-putting to me.

3 people found this helpful

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This book has changed my life

This book has permanently changed my life for the better. After reading MANY books on dealing with toxic individuals, this book has given me the research and grounding to make the break from my toxic family members. I will be forever grateful to Dr Sherri and her bravery and courage as well as clinical expertise through constant choice to keep growing past PhD education in helping me break free permanently from emotional abuse and create a free life for myself. She has helped save my life. Literally.

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A specialist that can relate to my problems.

Most of us here are seeking tips for dealing with our own toxic family members. The majority of my family (aunts, uncles, siblings, parents, in-laws, cousins) are completely toxic people. I needed to hear that I was not crazy. Dr. Campbell pretty much described my entire family in just a couple of chapters. I deeply appreciate our differences in experiences, though. It was hard to hear it, but it revealed the effects and outcomes of the abuse that my sister has received. We were both abused by our mother and neglected by our passive father, yet we came out as complete opposites.
The chapter about separation abuse was most helpful. I have been dealing with that for about 10+ years now and it feels great to know that someone understands the stress that I am going through and is supportive of my choices with cutting ties. No researcher could ever comprehend the trauma and paranoia separation abuse does to us. Only people that have been there and felt this pain could ever understand and offer coping mechanisms for us--and telling us that we're not alone is already comforting.

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Been through most of this

I have faced much of what was disscussed in this book. Over the last ten years I have been learning to apply some of the things in this book. I highly suggest this book for thoses struggling with emotional abuse.

2 people found this helpful

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  • Muslimah
  • 08-14-20

Loved every minute!

This book is bang on! she is so brave to speak out, and shows such courage and strength. Highly recommended!!

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  • sharon Hadley
  • 08-01-21

An interesting perception on toxic parents

From an estranged mother who has acknowledged her flaws and is learning to attempt to put things right and relate to adult children this was interesting to hear from the voices of others. I think it would have been better if there had been some parent’s experiences as well and solutions of how to meet half way and develop healthier parent and adult child relationships.

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  • Kate
  • 04-02-21

Initially resistant but a powerful book

I was initially resistant to this book, a recommendation from my therapist. The title is so loaded and it’s not what I wanted however I did resonate a lot with Dr Sherrie’s story. If you’re dealing with any of these issues or going through this painful process it’s important to hold yourself accountable too. If you’ve been honest without being brutal and clearly asked “What’s wrong and how can we fix the problems between us?” (but keep hitting a brick wall) then this book is a helpful tool in setting and navigating difficult boundaries.

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  • Anonymous User
  • 08-05-21

Must read. Allow yourself to feel the rage

Anyone who grew up with a narcissistic parent should read this book or, even better, listen to the audiobook. Apart from all the useful insights, it allowed me to feel the rage that I stuffed down as a kid when faced with the injustice of being the family scapegoat. Feeling the rage and being angry at the right people instead of directing it all at myself, has been a huge step towards healing. Highly recommended.

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  • Anonymous User
  • 05-19-21

Insightful read for adults in Toxic Familiies

This is a eye opening book for adult children of toxic families.....I am at a place in my life where I have to questioning where I fit in my family. As I listened to this book....I realise I am the family scapegoat....It's not nice to now identify myself in this way. Society has accepted that you can marry these toxic people and leave them but what if they are our own biological family. You are not allowed to leave....Thank you for showing me the way.

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  • Anonymous User
  • 03-17-22

Thankyou

This was absolutely all that I needed and more. Thankyou for sharing your story to help me share mine.

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  • Antonia Burt
  • 11-22-21

Highly recommend

Dr Sherrie has a nice voice to listen to. Excellent advice. I thoroughly enjoyed the book and will definitely be listening to a few chapters over and over again. Thank you