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Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men | [Lundy Bancroft]

Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men

He says he loves you. So...why does he do that? You've asked yourself this question again and again. Now you have the chance to see inside the minds of angry and controlling men---and to change your life. In this groundbreaking book, a counselor who specializes in working with abusive men shows you how to improve, survive, or leave an abusive relationship.
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Publisher's Summary

He says he loves you. So...why does he do that? You've asked yourself this question again and again. Now you have the chance to see inside the minds of angry and controlling men---and to change your life. In this groundbreaking book, a counselor who specializes in working with abusive men shows you how to improve, survive, or leave an abusive relationship. You will learn about:

  • The early warning signs
  • Ten abusive personality types
  • The role of drugs and alcohol
  • What you can fix, and what you can't
  • How to get out of a relationship safely

©2002 Lundy Bancroft (P)2011 Tantor

What the Critics Say

"This is essential reading for those in the helping professions and highly recommended for all libraries, especially those in communities with emergency shelter programs." (Library Journal)

What Members Say

Average Customer Rating

4.6 (138 )
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    Shelly A. 07-19-15
    Shelly A. 07-19-15 Member Since 2015
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    "great insight behind the thinking"

    good information on a subject that can mentally destroy families and make one feel they have lost their mind.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    G.Soto Chicago IL 06-04-15
    G.Soto Chicago IL 06-04-15 Member Since 2014

    I am Counseling Graduate student at NLU. Inetersted in any child development or therapy topics, including holistic, art and substance abuse therapies and also anything on buddhism ro spirituality.

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    "This is a favorite of mine. I will reread it."

    Enlightening! A must read for all! I will be gifting it to friends and clients as well.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Leigh J. Ridley Park, PA 05-28-15
    Leigh J. Ridley Park, PA 05-28-15

    LoveLeigh1

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    "A Must Listen!
    Gets the point across quite well. "

    No story line, Simply an awesome book. Does not only apply to man woman relationships, but can apply to any toxic relationship! My life is full of corrosive people, this would go well with The Nice Girl Syndrome. I am a kind hearted, giving prison and very easily taken advantage of! it's given me the strength to move on at 51 after 11 Long years with a wonderfully kind, sensitive man, of course to everyone but ME! My abandonment issues are partly to blame, keeping me in these repeated abusive relationships for my entire life! W@W!

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    AMSH 05-26-15
    AMSH 05-26-15
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    6
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    "I Now Understand"

    Helped me to gain the strength needed to stand up for myself, hold my partner accountable, and remember that my rights should be respected.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    wendy 05-18-15
    wendy 05-18-15 Member Since 2014
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    "Knowledge is power"

    This book opened my eyes to not only my own struggle but to how much still needs to been done in society before women can truly be seen as deserving equal respect. A must read for any young woman before she commits to a relationship.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Kay Jay 04-29-15
    Kay Jay 04-29-15
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    "Profound understanding of abuse & it's impact"

    Lundy Bancroft not only understands abuse, but he explains it in a way that makes me as a former victim of abuse, feel heard and validated.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Katy L. 04-28-15
    Katy L. 04-28-15 Member Since 2014
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    "Must Read"

    Spot on! This should be a psychology class requirement for all students to read. I have been really there myself.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    J. Lamoglia Oakland, TN 04-26-15
    J. Lamoglia Oakland, TN 04-26-15
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    "Life changing"

    I will listen to this book every day if I have to. Excellent voice and flow. Thank you Lundy Bancroft for your insight and sensitivity when you shared with all of us.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    lisa 03-18-15
    lisa 03-18-15 Member Since 2014
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    "Excellent"

    This book was very easy to understand and the author did a great job on details, explanations and examples. I highly recommend this book.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    JessG 01-29-15
    JessG 01-29-15 Member Since 2011
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    "A must listen/read for all."

    If you feel like you're in an unhealthy relationship & have nothing left to give. Listen/ read this. Abuse comes in many forms & the dangerous effects are numerous. Actually I think everyone needs to read/listen to this. The social acceptance of domestic abuse is sickening. I had no idea this problem was so fast & rapid. 1 in 3 women will experience some kind of domestic abuse in her lifetime. Craziness. We all need to be aware of everything Lundy has to say on this subject. Without him, without this book I would have stayed in an unsafe & unhealthy relationship. Knowledge is power. This book is a Godsend. Thank you Lundy.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful

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