No Visible Bruises

What We Don't Know About Domestic Violence Can Kill Us

By: Rachel Louise Snyder

Narrated by: Rachel Louise Snyder

Length: 12 hrs and 19 mins

Publisher's summary

An award-winning journalist's intimate investigation of the true scope of domestic violence, revealing how the roots of America's most pressing social crises are buried in abuse that happens behind closed doors.

We call it domestic violence. We call it private violence. Sometimes we call it intimate terrorism. But whatever we call it, we generally do not believe it has anything at all to do with us, despite the World Health Organization deeming it a 'global epidemic'. In America, domestic violence accounts for 15 percent of all violent crime, and yet it remains locked in silence, even as its tendrils reach unseen into so many of our most pressing national issues, from our economy to our education system, from mass shootings to mass incarceration to #MeToo. We still have not taken the true measure of this problem.

In No Visible Bruises, journalist Rachel Louise Snyder gives context for what we don't know we're seeing. She frames this urgent and immersive account of the scale of domestic violence in our country around key stories that explode the common myths - that if things were bad enough, victims would just leave; that a violent person cannot become nonviolent; that shelter is an adequate response; and most insidiously that violence inside the home is a private matter, sealed from the public sphere and disconnected from other forms of violence.

Through the stories of victims, perpetrators, law enforcement and reform movements from across the country, Snyder explores the real roots of private violence, its far-reaching consequences for society and what it will take to truly address it.

©2019 Rachel Louise Snyder (P)2019 Audible, Ltd

Story mixed w/ solutions for change.

So many great take aways and lots of insight into the painful world of domestic violance.

A must read …

An eye-opening and painful look at Domestic violence, ever person should read this book to be aware of and perhaps help prevent DV

DV

What a wonderful book. I learned a lot even as a DV expert. Thank you for all the information and inspiration!

All the stars, must listen

All the stars for this book. And the book I wish existed while I did domestic violence advocacy for 8 years in my 20s. Rachel Snyder breaks down domestic violence to its core with stories of survivors, and many stories where there were no survivors. She explains why we judge, especially why women judge, women in these situations—saying they’d never be in the same situation “hit me once and I’ll be gone!”. But it’s not like that. It doesn’t start with a punch, it starts with what seems like “love”. I also love how she talks with perpetrators who are trying to turn their lives around, and showing how difficult it is to break that cycle. Citing that we need to offer more support to them, almost like AA, to open the doors on this cultural epidemic and not allow it to hide behind closed doors of shame.
I am proud to say that I worked for an amazing organization that provided much of the support she discussed in this book, but it also put roadblocks in front of women. Things seem to be getting better with that now, but the numbers aren’t decreasing.
Everyone should read this book, as everyone whether you know it or not, knows someone who is currently or has been abused by an intimate partner.
And if you need someone to talk to, call my friends at First Step in metro-Detroit ❤️ [phone]

Data

Sometimes a little one sided, but good information to have. It is old data, but that’s not surprising. I was thrilled that it was mentioned that not only women are domestic violence victims, as I have many male friends that are victims as well.

For EVERYONE

So very eye-opening. I’m very grateful this book was recommended to me and I read it. Being read by the author made it even better. Will be telling everyone I know to read this. It should be read by everyone. Educating yourself is the first step to creating change.

Learned so much, one bone to pick

I learned so much from this book, especially since it explains so much about the mentality of the abused. It is easy for people to say "if it was that bad, she would leave", but now I know that in most cases they stay because they are bargaining for their life and/or trying to give stability to their children. I would have never understood why the abused stay without this book. This book has given invaluable knowledge that I hope will make me better both professionally and personally. I have only one bone to pick: as a woman who owns an AR 15 and is planning on purchasing a hand gun, I hated that this book mentioned multiple times that the problem is the guns. Twice it mentions that there was a study where a guy asked 14 prisoners who murdered their spouses if they would have killed their wives if they didn't have a gun and 11 said "no". There is literally no way to prove that they would/or would not have killed their spouse without a gun, and I would take a murderer's words with a grain of salt. Also, in the afterward it mentioned that France and Spain have rising domestic violence, these two countries have some of the strictest gun laws in Europe, but don't take my word for it look it up. The problem begins with youth seeing violence and normalizing violence until adulthood, this book made that very evident. We need schools to teach the elements of healthy realtionships for both male and female adolescents. I feel empowered with my guns, and I truly believe that guns are the great equalizer. Guns can empower women if they go through training on how to use it and when to use it, especially women who have fled a domestic violence relationship and are starting their new life without the abuser. There are plenty of places that train women specifically on how to use guns, what kind is right for them, and when to use it. Other than the anti-gun agenda, I have gained invaluable knowledge from this book and will continue to reflect on all of these women's stories in hopes that one day domestic violence will have ZERO tolerance in our society. Thank you Rachel Snyder for sharing these stories and bringing light to this topic.

A must read for everyone

The statistics will blow your mind. This extremely timely book answers both questions: Why she stays and Why he doesn't leave and offers ways to help them both escape alive.

A book with the power to transform men.

Any man who truly wants to be a better man, a more supportive partner and an effective parent, but doesn't know where to begin, should start with this book.

loved it engaging interesting

I t reminds me to never get into an abusive relationshipever again.I can be miserable by myself .this book was a wake-up call for me.I t was very helpful to me.