Showing results by narrator "Andy Barker" in All Categories

Dead Clown Barbecue is a collection of 29 gleefully macabre tales, seven of which were written just for this collection. There’s even a brand-new one about a ventriloquist dummy. Those things creep you out, right?  

Bent on taking over the earth, the deadly Thone have planted a monstrous device on our planet's surface. Trapped inside is a group of scientists, spies, and innocent bystanders. Part maze, part torture chamber, part laboratory, the house of doors is a test. If its captives survive, the Thone will withdraw from earth and leave us in peace.  

In 1947, around the same time as the so-called Roswell alien landing, another UFO crashed to earth, falling deep within the soil of Lemonsville County. During the night, five people were slaughtered, but nothing happened for the next 73 years. In 2020, an earth tremor shook Lemonsville, leaving an opening for the new killers of the night to attack. Daniel Boone, the local police chief, must find a way to solve the mystery of why people are being slaughtered or have gone missing. It takes him on a journey to the past, where his grandfather was a witness to the original murders.

The Wonderful Visit tells the story of an angel who finds himself unexpectedly marooned on Earth. Wells used John Ruskin's remark that an angel appearing on earth in Victorian England would be shot on sight as the inspiration for this tale of a celestial being who is completely out of place in human society. Ironically, the angel's first confidant and protector is a clergyman, who never recovers from the eventual and inevitable disappearance of the angel. Wells dwells in detail on the contrast between the idealism of the celestial visitor and the discourtesy of his hosts.

A city where people are turning gleefully insane. Inescapable blood-sucking bugs. A serial killer who may have discovered proof of alien life. A kinky proposal to "even out" an instance of infidelity. A man whose fingernails are growing at an out of control rate. These are only a few of the stories in Jeff Strand's deranged new collection, which includes several macabre tales written just for these bloody audiobook.

Cemetery Dance Magazine says that, "No author working today comes close to Jeff Strand's perfect mixture of comedy and terror." Gleefully Macabre Tales compiles 33 of his most twisted blends of cringe-worthy horror and ghoulish humor, with a couple of serious pieces thrown in just to mess with you.   

The town of Clifton Falls had recently put aside the terrible bank robbery from a few months earlier, only to be faced with the worst week in the lives of every resident. Blake sat with his closest friends thinking about the week that was best left forgotten. He’d been a survivor of the deadly onslaught of crazed zombies, and he sat telling his story to his friends. Blake’s farming company was chosen to be a guinea pig for a new, chemically tested fertilizer. It was meant to destroy the plant-eating bugs and help grow the crops.

The 10 best Bond movies...ever? It doesn't get much more subjective than this. Or much more fun!

A terror from the past has returned, bringing with it death and destruction that threatens to overrun the town. The old stories tell of a postwar experiment gone wrong, one that opened the way for the fog - or whatever was behind it - to begin its reign of terror. A small team of workmen are the last hope to keep their town alive through the long, storm-filled night. But the many horrors that await them are beyond anyone’s worst nightmares.

Alien beings bent on our destruction have seeded the world with horrible machines capable of transforming our planet into a hellhole where only they can live. Our only hope is to solve the puzzle of a four-dimensional maze, an alien thing that is part building, part machine, and part psychological torture chamber. A few brave men and women - and one fearless dog - dare to enter the maze. What they find there will change their lives forever, as the alien machinery creates terrifying worlds based on their worst nightmares.

The summer solstice is the longest day of the year, but even the light can't keep away all that goes bump in the night. From rituals and witches to summer slasher and sunny horror, this anthology has it all.  

There are eyes on its wings. Many have this subterfuge somewhere upon them, out there in the wilds, and, therefore, the concept is not exactly strange. Used to fool predators, it is an effective tool of disguise. But this is not a creature of the wilds. What is this winged wonder?

 At the End is an insight taken from FingerNale Tales, and tells the story of a woman looking back over the years of her life. 

Blood is bright crimson. Your lips have turned blue. Best keep both eyes open. Because we are coming for you. - Valentine's Day isn’t all love, fun, and games. Flash horror Valentine's stories from a ton of talented authors. From dark and disturbing, morbid humor, or guts and gore; these stories have it all. How will you celebrate the holidays?

The town of Flarant is abandoned to its fate, year after year. Year after year, the people of Flarant lose their children to the ghosts and ghouls on All Hallows Eve. They cannot flee. They are beyond all hope. And then a stranger enters the town in the days leading up to the event. This year, there is difference in the air. This year, the children are not alone.

The 10 best Bond movies...ever? It doesn't get much more subjective than this. Or much more fun! Come and join international best-selling author Mark Williams on a personal James Bond odyssey as he explores the phenomenon that is James Bond, starting with the Bond film that made number 10 on the list: Thunderball.

A cheerful snack mascot who snaps under the pressure. The nightmarish effects of the most depressing holiday song of all time. A virtual-reality environment that allows you to enact your most depraved fantasies...sort of. Giant mutant cockroaches doing battle with zombies in the Old West. An unnerving discovery in the Book of Revelations. The true secret of silent comedian Buster Keaton's success. Plus a Halloween curse, a lot of psychopaths, and much more!  

The year is 1898. Doctor Watson is once more in Lyme Regis to visit the lady in his life, Mrs. Beatrice Heidler. A gruesome death with echoes of one of Sherlock Holmes previous cases brings Holmes himself down to Dorset. In the company of an old friend, they encounter an old enemy with vengeance on his mind. A tale of revenge, violent deaths, and plum puddings.

From evil bunnies to killer leprechauns or Taco Tuesday gone wrong, Dark Celebration has it all. This is a macabre collection of mixed holiday horror sure to keep you on your toes with your eyes open all night. Dark Celebration is book four in the Holiday Horror Collection series.

The year is 1903. Lyme Regis. The Royal Navy comes to town. As do Sherlock Holmes and Doctor Watson. And Mrs Watson. And Lydia. And a ghost. And a dog. And a man with murder on his mind. This, the last of the trilogy of Sherlock Holmes in Lyme Regis pastiches, is bright, breezy, and fun.