Still Alive: Series Box Set, Books 1-4

By: Javan Bonds

Narrated by: S.W. Salzman

Length: 23 hrs and 33 mins

Publisher's Summary

Mo Collins, the reluctant hero, has sailed around the country on board the replica pirate ship, the Viva Ancora, and now he finds himself only miles from his childhood home. But now the world has gone to hell. Hordes of naked, blue, biting zombies have flooded the now dead Alabama lake town. Mo and his only surviving shipmate, Crow, spend their days fishing and their nights watching the monsters roam, seeking untainted flesh and leaving a disgusting mess in their wake. But when a lone survivor stumbles upon Mo and Crow, they gain a new crew member but also find much needed direction. The newcomer, Smokes, will change Mo's view of this zombie-infested world forever. 

As reality mimics fiction, an ever-growing cast of crazy characters plays out their role carving out an island sanctuary in a plague-ridden world. The Expert, The Tech, The Oracle, The Sacrifice, The Old Friend, plus many more.... Join us on this wild ride where the fish bite, the Zombies bite...sometimes life bites. 

Welcome aboard, friend, to The Still Alive Series.

Winner of the 2019 Independent Audiobook Awards (IAA) for Humor 

This box set includes:
Book One: Zombie Lake
Book Two: Zombie Island
Book Three: Zombies On A Plane
Book Four: Zombie Oasis

©2017, 2018, 2019 Javan Bonds (P)2019 Javan Bonds

Zombie Comedy!

Zombie Lake:
I don't know what to say because while this book wasn't really my taste, I see the appeal and also see why so many people loved it. This was mostly world building and getting to know the characters while Mo, the main character, gets together a band of interesting and diverse people to face the zombie apocalypse. This book had very little zombies in it and it also didn't have much excitement in the way of survival like I normally expect from this genre. There is a lot of humor for listeners who like comedy and I couldn't believe how different each character is and how fun it was to see so many personalities and lifestyles together in one group. The zombies aren't your normal zombies, I will admit I didn't think flesh eating zombies could get more gross than that but these ones are disgusting and I don't mean gory. The writing was very good and I think this is the beginning of what is probably a great series and a fun world created by the author.

Zombie Island:
I went into book 2 with high expectations of this story taking off and being filled with action and I have to say it wasn't what I thought it would be. As a continuation of book 1, this book is more would building and more survivor collecting for the group. Sadly for me, it still lacked the zombie excitement I wanted but from reading reviews I see that that is still coming in the series. Again this book was filled with humor and is politically incorrect in a sometimes crude but funny way. If humor was my thing, I would be devouring this series.

I didn't continue after book 2 because it is just not my taste. Again this isn't me saying it was bad in anyway, just not for me. I know many people who will love this and I have already recommended it to a few guys I know!

I love S.W. Salzman, he does an amazing job with so many accents. I will admit a few of them were not my thing but that is just a matter of taste and says nothing about his job as a narrator. He did it perfectly, I know that the humor in the story called for the over the top accents so I get it and I know I am 100% in the minority on this one when I say it was a bit too much for me.

8 people found this helpful

super hilarious

These books had me dying laughing, now that smokes guy he's my favorite 😂😂😂😂! Javan keep em coming and don't mind the people talking about you being racist, hell I'm blk and see nothing racist about it, dam good read mufuckah😂😂😂

3 people found this helpful

Awesome series!

This series is the funniest and most brilliant zombie series out there! You will laugh until you cry and you will probably even snort a few times!
Mo and Smokes are the comedic duo you have been missing from your life.
Narrator SW Salzman is excellent.
Bonds and Salzman make an great team. I’ve also reviewed each book individually if you want more detail.
Just be ready for gore, humor, and a ton of pop culture referencing science fiction.
Can’t say it enough, I LOVE this series.

3 people found this helpful

zombies in Alabama!

This had been one of the funniest books I've heard in a long while. it's a great story

1 person found this helpful

Not your average zombie series

I don't like zombie books because they feel pretty played out at this point, and they can be so depressing. This one was an easy exception. I was offered a free copy of this series for an honest review and I read some other reviews and decided to give it a chance because what's there to lose except for time. I burst out laughing within the first few minutes of it starting.
What I like about it:
It's really really really funny, in a nerdy awkward sometimes absolutely disgusting way. I like that Moe is really average maybe a little less than average and he knows it. He's awkward and southern and someone that you can actually imagine existing. I like that the zombies are different. I also like that the main bunch of characters is fighting in the zombie apocalypse basically dressed up like functional cosplayers and they live on a pirate ship. I also like that there are some moments that are too real. I wont get into those but they exist. I also love the other references to pop culture. A lot of the time I thought I was listening to one giant inside joke, but I
Things that made me go ew: There is a loooot of talk about male genitalia, A LOT. Normally this wouldn't get to me but there is one very memorable, very graphic scene that went on for what feels like forever about a zombie's genitals. I'm not going to tell you what part because I don't want to ruin the absolute horror and disgust for you, the listener. Also as a female sometimes I wish there were more strong female characters most of the chicks seem like idiots in this story, but I also get that this is from the point of the main character. Overall five stars. It was easy to get submersed in this ridiculous world.
Finally. I adore S.W. Salzman's narration. He does an excellent job. I've listened to one of the other books he did and both are absolutely brilliant. Inflection and accents are spot on.

1 person found this helpful

Original and fun

Accents takes a bit of adjusting to.

Original and relatable characters. I enjoy ever second of it!

1 person found this helpful

Enjoyable zombie 🧟‍♀️ series

"This book was given to me for free at my request and I provided this voluntary review."

This is my first zombie book. I don’t watch zombie shows or gasp, the walking dead! But I enjoyed this series and loved the humor in it. I didn’t mind the blood or gore as it was necessary for the story. I liked the narrator for the most part, the only voice I didn’t like was the hero, Mo. it wasn’t the accent so much as the cadence. However, it didn’t bother me enough to stop listening 😊 I look forward to moving onto the 5th book to catch up with all the characters.

1 person found this helpful

cant wait to get the next box set

I loved the way it had both drama and fiction to really let you get to know the characters.
I can wait to see what happens next to Mo and his crew of misfits.
Great books I highly recommen

1 person found this helpful

Fun and interesting

When I first started this I was unsure of the narrator. However as I got to back to you I finally realized that I enjoyed listening to the southern drawl. The story is unique and interesting and fun. I would highly recommend this series. I started book 5 and hope there will be other books coming.

1 person found this helpful

Still Alive

OMG, I freaking love this series! I have not laughed so hard while reading/listening to a book in a long, long time! I'm pretty sure that I snorted Coke out of my nose a few times (and, no, I don't mean Coca-Cola.....it was Mountain Dew!).

Javan Bonds has absolutely nailed what I have always pictured the Zompoc to be. Our protagonist, Elmo Collins (better known as Mo) decides to write a journal to chronicle his day to day life after the Peevies have taken over. He can't believe that he isn't seeing tons of dead bodies or zombies when he ventures off the replica pirate ship where he works. Instead, he encounters people who seem to be fellow members of a movie cast!

I love all of the movie/TV references throughout the book. And, Smokes is a walking stereotype that you just have to love! You have an old friend in Bradley, who is a paraplegic complete with his service monkey, Mary. Mr. Bonds throws caution to the wind and mentions just about every stereotype you can think of in his descriptions of his characters. I love that he doesn't seem to care about being PC (a rare thing in today's world!).

Being from the South, I especially enjoyed the scene in Wal-Mart, where our crew goes to find supplies. Of course, if you are from the South, you know that you ALWAYS meet somebody you know when you go to WM! Our group encounters Mo's old love (who he was too shy to really pursue) and the local drunken redneck, Walt, who is only there for the beer.

I would caution the listener to be aware that this is a series that is NSFW. You will definitely embarrass yourself if you listen in a public place by bursting into gales of laughter. If you are easily offended by politically incorrect stuff or cursing, give this one a pass. However, I never thought that I would be laughing like a pre-teen boy at some of the jokes, so you never know!

I could go on and on, but you just have to listen to this series to really appreciate all of the fun! S.W. Salzman does an absolutely amazing job with the accents and dialects throughout the book. I plan to continue this series (and reread these books often) and I know that I will always hear his voice when I do.

If you love Zombie books and want to read a unique one, grab this series and never look back! Great job, Javan! Keep up the good work & I'll meet you at the Wal-Mart!

1 person found this helpful

Zombiedy with a pirate ship! Heck, yeah!

This is such a ridiculous and fun story. Mo is engaging and the zombies are nudists. Luckily, there’s this pirate ship where Mo can hangout with his few friends. The story had me laughing, sometimes at inappropriate moments. Being gnawed on by zombie nudists isn’t funny…. or is it?

Mo cusses, a lot. Hence, I felt right at home with this character from the beginning. Now Mo also is a bit of an idiot and he’s got some ‘isms’ to deal with, like his casual racism, homophobia, and sexist ways. At first, I wasn’t too sure what the story was going to do with this aspect but as the plot develops, I could see the author was using Mo’s hangups as a way to poke fun at such aspects of society. In this way, the Still Alive series reminded me a bit of True Blood and how it pokes fun at racism, etc.

The humor is a mix of slapstick, sarcasm, and poking fun at racism, sexism, homophobia, etc. When I tired of the slapstick, a bit of sarcasm stepped in, and when I tired of that, Mo was again proclaiming he’s not sexist even while he ogled some woman. It’s a good thing Mo is a good guy in general, and that he’s working on broadening his horizons.

The ladies don't get much page time and this is the one weakness of the story. Now admittedly, the bulk of the story is told through Mo’s eyes and he doesn’t hang out with the women much. Still, I wanted more Hammer, and I wanted to know more about Crow. I would love a story featuring Hammer, Crow, and Bradley. The zombies would be vanquished! Mary, Bradley’s service monkey, had the most page time out of all the female characters (and she’s a humorous addition).

I think this series really indulges my immature side, in a totally good way. It’s hard to not make fun of blue nudist cannibals, as Mo can attest to. The weenie jokes are everywhere in this book and I did snort-giggle a time or two. Sometimes the grundge talk (how gooey those zombies really are) goes a little far for me so I don’t recommend eating while listening to this book. 4.5/5 stars. 

The Narration: S. W. Salzman is pretty good for this series. The setting is Alabama so sometimes the accent was there and sometimes it was just a bit off for Book 1. But his Alabama accent was really good for the rest of the series. He had distinct voices for all the characters and his female voices were feminine. I especially like his voice for Hammer and for Mo’s mom. The pacing was perfect and there were no technical issues with this recording. 4.75/5 stars. 

You guys!!!

If you love zombies, juvenile humor, naked blue people, and gratuitous violence, this is the series for you! There are poop jokes and anatomy jokes to last you for days! I am 44 years old, and this is my third time listening to this series. Yes, I admit to having the humor of a teenaged boy. There. I said it. Fight me. Or, probably don't, since I would lose. But seriously, if you love to laugh at inappropriate jokes, appreciate the code of rednecks, and don't have a weak stomach, you should grab this bundle! Thank me later.