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Publisher's Summary

Fascinating patient stories and dynamic exercises help you connect to healing emotions, ease anxiety and depression, and discover your authentic self. 

Sara suffered a debilitating fear of asserting herself. Spencer experienced crippling social anxiety. Bonnie was shut down, disconnected from her feelings. These patients all came to psychotherapist Hilary Jacobs Hendel seeking treatment for depression, but in fact none of them were chemically depressed. Rather, Jacobs Hendel found that they’d all experienced traumas in their youth that caused them to put up emotional defenses that masqueraded as symptoms of depression. Jacobs Hendel led these patients and others toward lives newly capable of joy and fulfillment through an empathic and effective therapeutic approach that draws on the latest science about the healing power of our emotions. 

Whereas conventional therapy encourages patients to talk through past events that may trigger anxiety and depression, accelerated experiential dynamic psychotherapy (AEDP), the method practiced by Jacobs Hendel and pioneered by Diana Fosha, PhD, teaches us to identify the defenses and inhibitory emotions (shame, guilt, and anxiety) that block core emotions (anger, sadness, fear, disgust, joy, excitement, and sexual excitement). Fully experiencing core emotions allows us to enter an openhearted state where we are calm, curious, connected, compassionate, confident, courageous, and clear. 

In It’s Not Always Depression, Jacobs Hendel shares a unique and pragmatic tool called the Change Triangle—a guide to carry you from a place of disconnection back to your true self. In these pages, she teaches lay readers and helping professionals alike:

  • Why all emotions—even the most painful—have value. 
  • How to identify emotions and the defenses we put up against them. 
  • How to get to the root of anxiety—the most common mental illness of our time. 
  • How to have compassion for the child you were and the adult you are.

Jacobs Hendel provides navigational tools, body and thought exercises, candid personal anecdotes, and profound insights gleaned from her patients’ remarkable breakthroughs. She shows us how to work the Change Triangle in our everyday lives and chart a deeply personal, powerful, and hopeful course to psychological well-being and emotional engagement. 

PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.

©2018 Hilary Jacobs Hendel (P)2018 Random House Audio

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Simple and Profound

I was very surprised and delighted by how easy this book was to understand. It was very important to me because I have witnessed how tenacious my own defences are when trying to make emotional connections. The process is not easy and must be undertaken gently and with a great deal of self compassion. The author explains her techniques in a clear, jargon free manner and I was able to put them into practice right away.

The second thing I really loved about the audio book was that it was voiced by the author. She really did a great job and comes across as a sincere, open hearted person.

5 of 5 people found this review helpful

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Amazing!

Everyone should read this book. I'm a therapist and plan to give it to my family and refer it to all of my clients!

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

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Wow! Great! Something I’ve grasped and might use!

This book helps with your emotions instead of blocking them. I feel better after listening to it! My bad feelings are still there but now I feel like I can handle them! The book has a great system of dealing with our emotions and feelings.

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Amazing

Highly recommend to anyone wanting to understand how to deal with emotions and how to respond when they overwhelm you! Changed my life!

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A healing MUST!

Loved it! More people need to understand all of this powerful framework to recover and heal.

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Great book

I got what I was hoping to get from this book. It explores deeply how mindfulness can fill the gaps and problems that we create by ignoring or inhibiting our natural emotions. I loved it.