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GRANDMA?
- Attack of the Geriatric Zombies!
- Narrated by: Bob Walkenhorst
- Length: 6 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged Audiobook
- Release date: 02-06-17
- Language: English
- Publisher: Talon Konrath
- Whispersync for Voice-ready
Regular price: $19.95
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The bed and breakfast was hidden in the hills of West Virginia. Wary guests wondered how it could stay in business at such a creepy, remote location. Especially with its bizarre, presidential decor and eccentric proprietor. When the event hotel for the national Iron Woman triathlon accidentally overbooked, competitor Maria was forced to stay at the Rushmore. But after checking into her room, she quickly realized she wasn't alone. First her suitcase wasn't where she put it. Then her cell phone was moved. Finally, she heard an odd creaking under the bed.
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When Toby Floren was eight years old, he discovered a monster living in the woods behind his house. A ghastly, frightening creature with claws, fangs, and a taste for human flesh. As he ran out of the forest, screaming, Toby felt that he'd been lucky to escape with his life. Years later, Toby finds comfort with the creature. It's his own special secret - something that nobody else in the world knows about. Somebody to talk to. Somebody to confide in.
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I can't even...
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Blister
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They call her Blister. She's a hideously disfigured 23-year-old woman, living in a shed next to her father's house, hidden away from the world. Jason Tray is a successful cartoonist, banished to his agent's lakeside cabin for a few days of mandatory rest and relaxation. One night, while hanging out with a couple of the locals at a dive bar, he takes them up on their offer to go "see Blister," having no idea what they're talking about.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Very Surprisingly Story about humanity.
- By The Dark Side on 10-25-16
Publisher's Summary
Randall just wanted to have a fun summer vacation with his family, visiting Grandma at her cabin on a lake in the Wisconsin Northwoods.
Then everything went horribly wrong.
Join 15-year-old Randall, and his younger brother Josh, as they fight for their lives on the eve of an elderly undead apocalypse.
GRANDMA? - The Complete Novel
She won't bake you cookies...
Forget everything you know about zombies. But that's probably impossible, because you know a lot. So maybe just put aside your preconceptions, because this living dead epic will make you remember why you fell in love with this genre in the first place. Part scary, part funny, this is a living dead armageddon like you've never seen before.
Talon Konrath recently graduated high school. He's been working non-stop on GRANDMA? for three years.
J.A. Konrath is his father. He's sold more than three million books worldwide.
Together they're going to take you on the ride of your life.
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What members say
Average Customer Ratings
Overall
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4 out of 5 stars
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4.5 out of 5 stars
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4.5 out of 5 stars
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5 Stars18
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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- Jim "The Impatient"
- 02-08-17
BUTT CANCER USUALLY GETS YOU IN THE END
THE PADDLE BOAT HAS THE TOP SPEED OF A TWO LEGGED TURTLE
If you have a bad case of ZOMBIEITIS, this just might be MOLELICIOUS to you. Hopefully you are using PLOYGRIP which is ZINC FREE and your not scared of ZOMBAMBIE. If your okay with cheesy, like to laugh and okay with POOPY YA humor, than get out your GLOW FART JAR and listen in the dark.
IS JESUS A ZOMBIE?
If your a fan of J.A.'s lighter side, Kimball without the sex and bad words, than give this a try. While it has some gory,(as in bodily functions), it is not Jack Kilborn. It is YA. Before you get upset about the question about Jesus, I was actually asked that question while teaching Youth Sunday School.
39 of 47 people found this review helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Luelala
- 11-02-17
As always a Great funny horror
I have to be in the right mood to listen his books but they never dissapoint. You need to know what you are going to get though and that is a gory horror with no shortage of disgusting humor and graphic Gore. I do enjoy his books however and chose to listen to this one with teen daughter. She found it as amusing as I but be warned there can be quite offensive scenes and language. I listened on audible and thought they did a good job as always.
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Story4 out of 5 stars
- Andromeda
- US
- 06-19-17
Is there a Konrath fandom yet?!
I am so glad I took a chance on this book! I'm fairly certain I would read anything J.A. Konrath wrote. If he releases a book on the mating habits of sea slugs indigenous to the Arctic regions, I'd read it. And damn if I wouldn't enjoy it. But...the kid of an author? Really? That never ends well. Yes, Mary Higgins Clark and Stephen King, I'm talking about your offspring and how little I like their writing.
I debated. And debated. And then decided to give it a listen. I am so glad I did. Everything from Einstein's experiments to Josh's brilliance to the negative effect of dentures on zombie dining was entertaining. As a bonus, there is a brief interview at the end of the Audible version...I listened to every word of it, too.
Apparently I need to start a Konrath fandom
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- ericmadden
- 05-09-17
Next book
It is a good book and it needs a next book and it was a fun time
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Overall2 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Story2 out of 5 stars
- Ryan
- 02-11-17
Not his best work
I'm a huge J.A. Konrath fan but this was hard to finish. This is the only book by Konrath that I did not give 5 stars to.
0 of 1 people found this review helpful
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Overall1 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story1 out of 5 stars
- Benny butthead
- 08-06-17
sorry it was terrible.
Narration was excellent.
Story was like it was written by a 5 year old. The humor was cringeworthy. Plot ridiculous.
I apologize if this is written for the 5 to 10 year old genre. If so you should make it clear its not for adults.