• Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter

  • By: Seth Grahame-Smith
  • Narrated by: Scott Holst
  • Length: 11 hrs and 2 mins
  • 3.9 out of 5 stars (8,520 ratings)

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Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter  By  cover art

Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter

By: Seth Grahame-Smith
Narrated by: Scott Holst
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Publisher's summary

Indiana, 1818. Moonlight falls through the dense woods that surround a one-room cabin, where a nine-year-old Abraham Lincoln kneels at his suffering mother's bedside. She's been stricken with something the old-timers call "Milk Sickness."

"My baby boy..." she whispers before dying.

Only later will the grieving Abe learn that his mother's fatal affliction was actually the work of a vampire.

When the truth becomes known to young Lincoln, he writes in his journal, "henceforth my life shall be one of rigorous study and devotion. I shall become a master of mind and body. And this mastery shall have but one purpose..." Gifted with his legendary height, strength, and skill with an ax, Abe sets out on a path of vengeance that will lead him all the way to the White House.

While Abraham Lincoln is widely lauded for saving a Union and freeing millions of slaves, his valiant fight against the forces of the undead has remained in the shadows for hundreds of years. That is, until Seth Grahame-Smith stumbled upon The Secret Journal of Abraham Lincoln, and became the first living person to lay eyes on it in more than 140 years.

Using the journal as his guide and writing in the grand biographical style of Doris Kearns Goodwin and David McCullough, Seth has reconstructed the true life story of our greatest president for the first time-all while revealing the hidden history behind the Civil War and uncovering the role vampires played in the birth, growth, and near-death of our nation.

©2010 Seth Grahame-Smith (P)2010 Hachette Audio

What listeners say about Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter

Average customer ratings
Overall
  • 4 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    3,241
  • 4 Stars
    2,730
  • 3 Stars
    1,629
  • 2 Stars
    592
  • 1 Stars
    328
Performance
  • 4 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    2,983
  • 4 Stars
    2,250
  • 3 Stars
    1,026
  • 2 Stars
    267
  • 1 Stars
    185
Story
  • 4 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    2,725
  • 4 Stars
    1,954
  • 3 Stars
    1,329
  • 2 Stars
    476
  • 1 Stars
    311

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  • Overall
    2 out of 5 stars

Snooze

Im sure the book might have gotten better, but by the middle of the first chapter, I felt like I wanted to go to sleep

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3 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    2 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    2 out of 5 stars

What compelled me to buy this book?

To be honest, I saw a preview for this movie, and thought it looked awesome. I did chuckle at the thought of honest Abe hacking up vampires, but I thought I would give it a try.. It bored me... I never finished it. don't waste your credit..

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3 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    1 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    1 out of 5 stars

Yawn

This book wasn’t for you, but who do you think might enjoy it more?

I don't know who might like it more. It was just boring and seemed to lack, to me anyway, any suspenseful moments.

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1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    1 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    2 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    3 out of 5 stars

Wow. Couldn't wait for it to end

I really wanted to like this one, even though my gut was telling me "Don't get it!" I enjoyed the historical aspects so gave it 3 stars for that. The historical facts of one of our most iconic national figures were cleverly interwoven into a fascinating story line. But what started out with great promise just did not deliver. Much of the narration for Abe's dialogue was monotonous and sepulchral. The vampire "rules" were just not....vampiric enough. Probably the worst vampire novel I've ever read.

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  • Overall
    1 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    1 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    1 out of 5 stars

I DRANK THE KOOL-AID ON THIS ONE......

You know how you just know a movie is going to be a cheesy "B" movie but you see it anyway knowing that is part of the charm? Well this story doesn't even get a "B" rating from me.

The glimmer of an action packed story is here - Abe Lincoln Vampire Hunter - what's not to love about that? A lot believe me. In the first 20 pages the author gets right into Lincoln & vampires but the story is told by someone reading a diary & it is just kind of boring. The author weaves history in & out of the story which helps but he plods through the book with Abe killing vampires & nothing really happening. Vampires live amoung us & were part of history seems to be the point of the whole book. I'd recommend saving your credit & passing this one by. The narrator is as mediocre as the story.

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  • Overall
    2 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    1 out of 5 stars

Too much implausibility.

What disappointed you about Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter?

The story line is clever enough but there are significant plausiblity problems (even though the story is about vampires HA). The biggest that comes to mind, is that people are seen running around chasing & killing other people (vampires), ie. lots of murders going on over long periods of time and no one does any investigation or questioning or anything. It is as if Lincoln and the vampire hunters operated in a vacumn. Even though the story is fantasy there has to be logical connections, and i felt these were lacking. It soured the whole book for me.

Would you ever listen to anything by Seth Grahame-Smith again?

Not likely

What about Scott Holst’s performance did you like?

It was well read, just fine.

You didn’t love this book... but did it have any redeeming qualities?

Not really.

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  • Overall
    2 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    1 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    2 out of 5 stars

I just couldn't get into it.

Any additional comments?

In all honesty, I never finished listening to it, it failed to capture my interest. I know there is a movie coming out, but if I see it, it will be when it's released on DVD (which I won't be buying).

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  • Overall
    1 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    2 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    1 out of 5 stars

Writing leaves something to be desired

It kind of sucked honestly, story had promise but actual writing was week. It relied far to heavily on violence and dialogue wasn't strong.

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  • Overall
    2 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    2 out of 5 stars

Too wordy and not saying much.

What would have made Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter better?

I think the book needed more action. It went on and on about one theme. It brought in Lincoln's life but every part of his life was the same theme of righteousness. it's hard to think what would have made it better. I just didn't like it.

Has Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter turned you off from other books in this genre?

yes, I will not be listening/reading Seth's first book, Jane Austin and the Zombies, or whatever the tittle is.

Did Scott Holst do a good job differentiating all the characters? How?

Yes he was fine.

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  • Overall
    1 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    1 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    1 out of 5 stars

Totally stupid and irresponsible

really dumb, boring, and silly. It's shameful to even give this one star.
I'd like the 7 hours of my life, that I wasted, returned to me.
What's next? "Mother Theresa: Alien Prostitute"?

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