Showing results by author "Simon Rich" in All Categories

Before he was “Babe” or “The Sultan of Swat” or “The Great Bambino”, George Herman Ruth was just another teenage misfit at St. Mary’s School for Boys. But Ruth has something the other boys don’t, and when Baltimore Orioles manager Jack Dunn watches him throw a baseball over a building, Ruth gets the chance to punch his ticket out of the orphanage. All he has to do now is make the team.

Welcome to Heaven, Inc., the grossly mismanaged corporation in the sky. For as long as anyone can remember, the founder and CEO (known in some circles as "God") has been phoning it in. When God decides to retire (to pursue his lifelong dream of opening an Asian Fusion restaurant), he also decides to destroy Earth. The angels manage to strike a deal with their boss. He'll call off his Armageddon, if they can solve their toughest miracle yet: getting the two most socially awkward humans on the planet to fall in love.

Simon Rich is "one of the funniest writers in America" (The Daily Beast) - a humorist who draws comparisons to Douglas Adams (The New York Times Book Review) and James Thurber and P.G. Wodehouse (The Guardian). With Hits and Misses, he's back with a hilarious new collection of stories about dreaming big and falling flat, about ordinary people desperate for stardom and the stars who are bored by having it all.

In "Center of the Universe", God struggles to balance the demands of his career with the needs of his long-term girlfriend. In "Magical Mr. Goat", a young girl's imaginary friend yearns to become more than friends. In "Unprotected", an unused prophylactic recalls his years spent trapped inside a teen boy's wallet. The stories in Simon Rich's new audiobook are bizarre, funny, and yet...relatable. Rich explores love's many complications--losing it, finding it, breaking it, and making it--and turns the ordinary into the absurd.

From wild and wacky to knee-slapping, laugh-out-loud fun, these humorous tales represent some of the best of recent seasons of the hit public radio series Selected Shorts. Comedian Wyatt Cenac gives a killer performance of Simon Rich’s hilarious tale of woe from the point of view of a condom in a young man’s wallet. Alec Baldwin gives a delightful over-the-top performance of James Thurber’s wonderfully silly classic tale of the day everybody in a small Ohio town thought the dam broke.

Seymour is the least popular student at Glendale, a private school in Manhattan. His new nickname, “Chunk-Style”, is in danger of entering common usage. But then he meets the new transfer student: Elliot Allagash, evil heir of America’s largest fortune. Elliot’s rampant delinquency has already gotten him expelled from dozens of prep schools. But despite his best efforts, he can’t get himself thrown out of Glendale; his father has simply donated too much money. Bitter and bored, Elliot amuses himself by transforming Seymour into the most popular student in the school.

>From "one of the funniest writers in America" comes a collection of stories culled from the front lines of the millennial culture wars. Rife with failing rock bands, student loans, and participation trophies, Spoiled Brats is about a generation of narcissists - and the well-meaning boomers who made them that way.

Prepare for extreme horror. This collection of 10 stories features a range of international talent: award-winning authors, masters of horror, rising stars, and fresh new voices in the genre. Take care as you reach into these dark places, for the things here bite, and you may withdraw a hand short a few fingers. Authors included in this collection: Antonio Simon Jr., Trevor Boelter, Mia Bravo, Mark Meier, J.S. Watts, Paige Reiring, and Rich Phelan.